Put the past to rest? to get on with my future?

Question

Theres alot in my past that i just cant put to rest
do you think going back( to where i use to live and places where my childhood was) and trying to put it to rest will help me move on?

Answer 1

Hey, I tried that and I felt it worked well for a while. I revisited things in the past that had hurt me and reanalyzed what had happened.. there were some things I could analyze and understand and others that i just realized I had been holding onto for a long time and really no longer even remembered what the details were and why I had been so hurt. After a while I was able to let much of it go. I am still working on some of it, but I also believe that when I came back to the place that held my past, I stayed too long.. and though it had changed, possibly got stuck trying on an old persona. So, I would recommend that you revisit it since it is bothering you so much.. but learn from me and remember that your past, while you can learn from it and reanalyze it is your past.. remember who you are today.. who it is you are hoping to become and don't let yourself slip back into who you once were.. revisit, learn, love, and live the rest of your life, with the things that you learned from the past, but don't carry all of the hurtful things with you (I am still trying to learn that one.)

I suggest listening to "Walk On" by U2 on their "All that you can't leave behind" CD...

Answer 2

I've done that and in some cases its good to be in a place that has moved on without you. You can also do visionary releasing by writing down the issues in your past and then burning them one by one. You can do hypnosis and go back and explore these trauma's, go to a reputable counselor.

However in the end, the only thing that helps find release from past trauma's is to come to the realization that they are just that, the past. They can't hurt you, or harm you. Its gone, its over and its not coming back. Moving forward and breaking the patterns created by coping with those past events, takes consistent small steps to recognize and change the patterns. Say you drive to work one way every day, for what ever reason, usually its the fastest route. One day you leave alittle earlier and you get there by a completely different way. You still get there, but what you have experienced is completely different than what you have ever known. So now you have a choice, you can keep going to work the same way every day or you can choose something different that might be prettier, or calmer. Life is like that, we have patterns to our life because something in the past happened and this is how we learned to cope. Only by changing that pattern can we find release from pain.

I haven't had coffee yet, so if this doesn't make any sense to you, simply ignore it. Seek professional help if your past is crippling your future.

Answer 3

it could or it could go the other way and bring everything back, i once went back to a place i used to live when i was younger as i had a bad time in that house, i went past the house, i was shaking like a leaf and ended up having a few nightmares for a few nights after.
I suppose it all depends what went on in your past, is it worth bringing it all back to life again, or is it best to think...well i had a bad time, my life was terrible, but...im here, alot stronger at the end of it all.
i always say i wouldnt be the person i am today if alot of c**p hadn't happened to me while i was younger.
this is your life only you can deal with it, you'll never forget whatever is bothering you about your past, but try to think it's made you a better person today.

Answer 4

It is often best to put the past to rest through understanding of it, and through that we can thus understand the present.

To simply 'dump' the past (as in the expression, 'get over it,') is probably(!) an impossibility as the 'past' contains what makes us who we are and how we think, feel and behave.

If we were able to simply 'dump it,' it would be like erasing the past and much of who (etc) we are ....thus leaving us a BLANK to be written over with all new stuff. However, you'd still have to find someone/s to do the writing (as it were), and given the efforts needed for this, 'one had better get it right this time around.'

(otherwise you have a bloody awful never ending cycle of 'goes' at it.)

Sash.

Answer 5

If you are looking for closure and an end to the 'what ifs' and 'whys', going back would be the best thing to do. Obviously it might stir up some strong emotional feelings, and it might not be easy to handle them. Ask someone close to you to go with you and help you through it. Then put it officially behind you (you can even have a small ceremony) and move on with your life!
Good luck!

Answer 6

Iv had to do the same thing and in the long run benifited from it.
It can be hard at the time but just grin and bear it and you will pull through the important thing is to have a good network of friends and family beside you to make it easier but definietley do it because you will then be able to get some closure!

Answer 7

You don't necessarily need to go back to those places physically, especially if it was a scene of distress. It does helpt hough, but it can trigger unwanted memories that you'd rather not have come back.

If you'd like, we can talk about it more. I've set up a free service which people can join up on and just talk to me about any problems or anything that's bothering thme. Sort of like a counselling service that is completely anonymous. You don't have to give your name or anything.

Just the offer of this service and knowing it is there when they need it has helped some people, and I've convinced someone to join up already. So if you want, come and have a chat and I'll see if there is anything I can do to help.

http://www.phpbbserver.com/theconfidant/

You're also welcome to email me at [e-mail]

Answer 8

Our brain can think just only one thing at the time .
Control what you are thinking .
Refuse to think on what you could not affect by your action .
Past is just beyond correction .
Healthy direction to input to mental activity is toward the present .
Pls try .
There is no way back to the past , we change and places do change too .
Be completely where you are now .

Answer 9

I think that would only make it more difficult for you to move on. It would just refresh everything in your mind. Try writing everything down that you wish to get rid of and the read over it to be sure you want to get rid of it and then burn it. Watch it turn to ashes knowing that you are moving away form it all. Then bury the ashes in the soil. Good luck.

Answer 10

Whatever's in the past is history and cannot be changed. To move on with your life, you need to leave the past behind.
If you don't discard the old, the new will not come.