(or rather: how do you accept a lie and feel good about it)
2006-10-13 23:19:26 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Live and Learn.
2006-10-14 00:30:38 · answer #1 · answered by GrnApl 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It would be interesting to know why you are asking this question.
It is hard to admit to yourself that he never loved you, because we all have egos and fragile feelings of self worth. When you feel rejected, your self esteem suffers badly. If he has lied to you and told you he loves you, when he doesn't, then this is even harder as you now feel that you cannot ever trust anyone with your heart again in case they also lie to you and make you feel depressed, rejected, unworthy and unloveable. You are NORMAL, so don't panic!
Basically you have to be proud of who you are and decide that you are not going to let someone else have that much control over your feelings and emotions. No, this isn't easy! You ARE good enough for a relationship with someone. You ARE better off without this particular person, and there IS someone just right for you out there.
If you believe this then you'll be fine. I have been where you are and I took a long time to move forward but these days, I am a positive person who always looks for the good that can come out of events. Tell yourself that he helped make you a better person and you love who you are!
Also, use this as a growing experience for yourself and decide to never treat anyone else how he has treated you.
Go and do things with your friends and if they don't want to join you, go by yourself. Life is too short to waste a day on regret!
Good luck.
2006-10-14 06:33:42 · answer #2 · answered by Elle 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had a friend like that but i think she knew he did not and i told her to just 4get about him. you can move on i promise you each day gets better. Accept that you were strung along and used for sex even if there were mutual decisions and no expectations from either of you, that should make it get better and if your feelings got involved just keep your distance and have no contact until the pain subsides. remember that neither of you are perfect only Jesus and God can feel the hurt that you once had and just pray for those you hurt and the one that hurt you. At least he can smile knowing he got to eat the banana pudding dessert you prepared for him multiple times. Next time use your head and not your heart and visualize the outcome now both can go back to the people who really love you so i guess it is better to have loved than lost than not to have loved at all.
2006-10-14 06:26:15 · answer #3 · answered by noanswers 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dear Friends:
Its not hard to admit, its sooo painful, that it eats at the very cavity of your world-my world!
Sometimes we think that maybe we are not destinied to fall in love, to love and be loved!
Because we humans, esp women are such highly refined emotional creatures we constantly need the reassurance of love and comfort!
To think and admit that he never loved me, means thats my whole life, my dreams, commonsense and existence was and is a lie!
It is so painful even to think that he never and will never have any feelings for me! What do I do? How do I cope with this tearing pain?
Girlfiend sometimes the thought of divorce comes up into our thoughts then we say" what if we are making a mistake, nah, he loves us!". So you see the fear of life , the fear of lonilness and the fear of the life out there is what makes it hard to accept this painful fact of being unloved!
You can accept this fact and live with it, but although you are living you are dead- yep! dead heart wise and soul wise!
So there, I gave you some of my reasons y I can't accept that he never loved me! Hope it answers your questions and eases the sorrow of your soul! Good luck!
Love sanam
2006-10-14 06:57:30 · answer #4 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a good question. I'm dealing with a shaky relationship right now and the hardest thing for me to accept is that he may have been playing games all along and I just was really in the dark about it of I knew deep in my heart and just couldn't face it. Either way it hurts like crazy and I wish this pain on no one.
2006-10-14 06:23:22 · answer #5 · answered by softlyinspired 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do, but after I saw you last night with that other guy, and you still claimed that you loved me, it just made it official. Life is really too short for us to be angry; lets use what we have learned from this experience and make sure that we don't go wrong in our next relationship.
2006-10-14 06:22:37 · answer #6 · answered by syemour 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
because there was a time when the both of you were in love with each other and nothing else mattered, you shared moments that only meant something to each of you, there were times when you wished would never end all those things he said to you at just the right time, those promises he never intended to keep!
but most of all he made you cumm when no one else could!!
2006-10-14 07:11:18 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's all in our heads. Sometimes it harder to admit we didn't love ourselves. To accept it and feel good about it is to love ourselves. Letting go isn't difficult when you wish happiness on them too.
2006-10-14 06:29:05 · answer #8 · answered by suzuka s 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Truth hurts ... really painful cause i find it hard to accept truth myself. But try to over it by not pondering abt it. Keep urself busy.
2006-10-14 06:35:31 · answer #9 · answered by Sob Sob 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You never do except that he didn't love you you just learn to put it to the back of your mind and move on!
2006-10-14 06:22:37 · answer #10 · answered by Jo. 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you need to stop worrying about that and find someone that is going to love you the way you want to be loved. Your wasting precious time.
2006-10-14 13:13:23 · answer #11 · answered by luvlisteningtomusic 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋