I hadn't been treated the way a husband had suppose to the treated. She always say I didn't love her but married her for her house. which isn't true. I was the only one working in the household and paying all the bills after 3 yrs she gets a job and I still payed all the bills not askiing her for any of her money, for her to spend it the way she wanted too. I only ask for money once when I was behind on a bill, But she always say that I owe her. To me when you are married . We are suuppose to have each otheer. we Both are christians, we both Love God. But I don't want to be last on her list for love . What should I do ?
2006-10-13 18:32:14 · 7 answers · asked by David M 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Your wife needs to read the book "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands." She sounds like one of these foolish women who thinks a man is supposed to do everything for her and she doesn't have to do anything in return. Good luck.
2006-10-13 18:38:32 · answer #1 · answered by SLWrites 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a very complicated matter and very serious only married people or the divorced could relate to this. Do you have any children? It's easy for someone who hasn't experienced it to say move on. Well you know that if you payed everything for three years that she grew dependent upon you. You know what I see that she grew less attached to you. Think about it you are always at work and she didn't have a job. What did she do all day? It gets pretty boring by yourself. But thats understandable because you have to work life isn't free. Maybe if she had been working all along you both would have a long day and come home to enjoy each other. As far as the house that is her only possesion that she has that you havent provided and she feels an attachment to use that as an excuse. I think she got a job and decided to become big headed and thinks now she has a job and a home she don't need you anymore. Witch is not the case. Alot of females would appreciat that. I split every bill 50/50. But thats just me. The older beliefs believe in the man taking care of home. If she really didn't think you ever loved her why did she marry or you marry her. Come on now it's common sense. But you can't turn love off. You really need to find out what the real issue is that she is trying to hide from. There has to be a more significant reason than "you don't love me" and "you want me for my house". I see it like this if the man were working and paying everything you should be taking care of your man and your house upkeep as well. Your out there for the both of you. She is saying you owe her because you all are married and she expects you to take care of her no matter what. But reality is no body owes anybody anything. If she is christian and loves god like you say she do then she should be more open with you and you all should be able to work out your differences. If not then Im sorry she is doing more than you think. And that's real. Good Luck on saving your marriage and I hope everything works out for you.
2006-10-14 02:08:46 · answer #2 · answered by $Foxy Diva$ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A true Christian marriage is 50/50. She wasn`t acting like a wife or a Christian, and it doesn`t sound as if she was letting GOD be the head of your house. She is very materialistic and it was very demeaning to you to tell you that you only loved and married her for her house. Maybe she is the one with the hidden agenda and was trying to cover it up by making it look like it was all you. You were doing all the giving, and she was doing all the taking. You need to go to counseling so that you can get your self esteem back intack. You sound like a wonderful person, so don`t let this get you down. Continue to pray for strength and guidance from Jesus. May you be blessed with GOD`S favor and blessings through Jesus Christ.
2006-10-14 01:59:30 · answer #3 · answered by Sparkles 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like a very dysfunctional marriage. Plans of how to spend money should be agreed upon and the basic guidlines should of been decided before you said your I do's.
God forgives marriage mistakes. If you need to move on do so, but if you marry again make sure you discuss everything you do before you commit to someone. Have long converstaions ...like
What if........
Than what'''''
What would we do....
2006-10-14 01:38:40 · answer #4 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
next time you call her or talk to her tell her you want to go out on a date some time and buy her a rose or gift to let her know that you care for her tell her that you still love her!! this should do the trick!!
2006-10-14 01:37:07 · answer #5 · answered by delta_bonds 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
IS SHE AS CONTROLING AS SHE SOUNDS ! MY HUSBAND AND I HAVEBEEN MARRIED 29 YRS I DONT THINK HE OWES ME ANTHING AND I DONT OWE HIM WE ARE AS ONE SO GOD AS SAID WHEN I CAN DO SOMETHING TO PLEASE HIM OR HELP HIM OUT I AM BLESSED TO DO IT HE IS A GOOD HUSBAND AND WORKS HARD BUT IF SHE THINKS ALONG THE LINES OF YOU OWE ME!! THEN MAYBE SHE NEEDS TO GO TO THE ALTAR WITH THIS ADDITUDE AND ASK GOD LTO HELP HER BE THE KIND OF WIFE GOD TELLS US TO BE IN PROVER
WELL YOU NEED TO DO TWO THINGS IF YOU WANT A MARRIAGE WITH HER SIT HER DOWN AND TALKE AND PRAY TOGETHER FOR GOD TO GIVE THE BOTH OF YOU WISDOM AND THE STREGHT TO WORK THINGS OUT TELL HER IN THE BIBLE SARA CALLED HER HUSBAND ABRAHANM "MY KING" BECAUSE SHE LOVED AND RESEPTED HIM AND HONORED HIM AND THAT IS WHAT GOD WANT US AS WIFES TO DO IN GAL 5 IT TALKS ABOUT HOW A HUSBAND IS SUPOSE TO LOVE HIS WIFE AND HOW SHE IS TO SUMMIT TO HIM I THINK AS HUMAANS WE GET ON THIS THEWAY I WANT TO DO THING S KICK AND FORGET TO DO THEM GODS WAY!! GOD BLESS
2006-10-14 01:52:38 · answer #6 · answered by Msdeb gee 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She seems kind of selfish to me. There are really only 2 things you can do counseling or d-i-v-o-r-c-e. Good Luck.
2006-10-14 01:38:06 · answer #7 · answered by happy_cute_mom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋