Mathematical proof that girls are evil.....?

Question

First, we know that girls require time and money, so:
girls = time x money

And we all know that "time is money," so :
time = money

Therefore:
girls = money x money

which means that:
girls= money^2 (money squared)

And because money is the root of all evil:
money = square root of evil

Which means that:
money^2=evil

And since:
girls= money^2

And:
money^2= evil

We can conclude that:
Girls = Evil

Answer 1

Let me offer a parallel axiom. I am Dr. Evil.

Everywhere I go, girls tend to accumulate around me.

Hence,
Dr. Evil = Girls

At first I thought it was a fluke; however, it is actually applied physics and chemistry.

I have experimental evidence to support this man's theory.

His math is flawless. You cannot prove him wrong.

Answer 2

sofarsogood, I can assure you that the anecdote you have just given is completely false. Though it is true that I made a number of fallacious arguments in defense of catholicism (the most noted of which is my famous wager, which is still used in theological arguments to this day, despite its flaws), I have never stooped so low as to utter something nonsensical and irrelevant and then pretend that my opponent's inability to make sense out of nonsense had anything to do with the existence of God.

Anyway, the fallacy in this proof lies in the first step: girls may require time and money, but it does not follow from that that they ARE time and money, and in fact I dare anyone to produce a girl given only time and money to work with. Also, I think that the proper expression in step 5 is love(money)=√evil, not money=√evil. After all, the full aphorism is "the love of money is the root of all evil." So your proof is invalid there too. Good try though.

BTW, you may be interested in this proof I found the other day:
We know from physics that power=work/time. But time is money and knowledge is power, so:

knoweldge=work/money

Simple algebra then yields:

money=work/knowledge

Therefore, the more you know, the less you get paid. Something to think about when deciding whether to go to college.

Answer 3

There is the story of Pascal, a mathematician and devout Catholic, who was asked to defend God in a debate with an atheist who had achieved some popularity. The atheist did not understand math, so Pascal said (something like), "Monsieur, x^2+3*ab=y^(3/2), therefore God exists. Reply!" The opponent was left speechless.

So am I.

Answer 4

Girls = time x money is nonsense
Time = money is nonsense
Money is the root of all evil. This is not a square root
Your conclusion is nonsense

Th

Answer 5

In your proof you wrote money^2=evil twice, you just used the symmetrical property. Good Job. You must have too much time on your hands, baka. Get a job. GET A LIFE

Answer 6

Yet there are still more guys who do evil things. You don't believe me, just look at the number of the guys who are the heads of the states, countries and terrorist groups.

By the way, how many "evils" have fallen for so far?

Answer 7

Hehehe. The first time I heard that was back in '62 or '63.
Damn, Dewd!! I'll bet you just get more αss than a toilette seat with those kinds of proofs ☺


Doug

Answer 8

Personally, I find the proofs of the Pythagorean Theorem and Euler's Formula much more appealing.

Answer 9

Interesting proof.

We also know what happens when one by and one girl get together.
Boy + Girl = Good
Boy + zero = bad (When Boy is alone)
So subtract the two equations, you get:
Girl = Good - bad
So girls are good when the bad is taken out of them.

Answer 10

This doesn't follow, since the actual saying in the Bible is "The love of money is the root of all evil." Beyond that, we are all capable of doing evil things.