My dad was adopted at birth. My grandmother knew the birth mother's family *the birth mother was 15* and they arranged the adoption before he was born. I have a name and enough information to find her, but I want to get some health records without having to go to directly to her. This is following my father's wishes. He doesn't want to upset his adoptive mom by making her feel that he's looking for his "real" mom, and he doesn't want to upset his birth mother in case she does not want to be reminded of the past.
I want the health records most specifically because I want to see if there is a history of breast cancer in the family. I also would like to know if there are any other unhappy surprises that may show up.
Is there anyway to do this without alerting the birth mother? I don't want to disrupt her life, or my grandma's. I just want some information.
2006-10-13 16:33:31 · 3 answers · asked by LaLaLand 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I doubt that you'd be able to get that kind of information because it isn't held in any kind of centralized data base. You might be able to use the information you have to do some genealogy research and check the cause of death of female family members because death certificates are public record but if the person is still living or died of other causes there's no way to check.
2006-10-13 16:37:37 · answer #1 · answered by Kuji 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Regardless of a history of breast cancer, if you have it, treat it. If you don't, stop worrying about it. Either way, it doesn't matter how much research you do, there really are no preventative steps you can take to avoid breast cancer. If you are an adult, why don't you ask your grandmother in private. Don't betray your father's trust in you to not stir things up. This is his story. Not yours. Leave it that way if that is the way he wants it. You need to respect his wishes. If, someday, he wants to know, he will let you know too.
2006-10-13 23:42:21 · answer #2 · answered by sherijgriggs 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sweaty don't worry the way that i would try and go get his health records from his birth hospital or from his adoption agency if you guys dont know where his birth hospital is for sure go to his adoption agency and they will have all of his records and information
p.s. hope you find what you need
_*Anik*_
2006-10-13 23:40:05 · answer #3 · answered by ♥ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋