your toughest decision, if you ever had it to do over again, would you do it different ?

Answer 1

:) your question inspires an answer from me...

when i was 17, i had a dream to move to vancouver and attend the university of b.c. to study creative writing, and after graduation, envisioned living in a cabin in the mountains to write kick-a$$ novels. instead, and by a strange set of circumstances, i met my first boyfriend. we began dating, i fell "deeply" in love, became pregnant, and married at 18. i wept. this choice was a defining moment in my life.

at 19, i wept again as i quit school in order to deliver my daughter. at 23, i alone faced 4 law suits along with a car insurance company which refused to accept any liability due to non-payment of premiums, all resulting from the car crash which claimed my husband's life. at 25, i won all claims. call it providence, divine intervention, God, the universe, karma, my comeuppance... call it what you will.

at age 32, working 6 and 7 days a week, raising a daughter, managing a house with mortgage payments, vacations south each year, 2 evenings every week at night school with at least 10 hours of homework, i wept as i buried my mother. my only living blood relative was now my daughter, and we had become a family of two. all the while, as a single, half-educated (i placed first in my night school class and as granted ontario scholar standing), closet-writing mother, my dream remained alive.

little more than two years ago, still single with a now grown daughter, the chance to live in a cabin in the mountains presented itself to me. i decided this was finally! the culmination of my most ardent desire. i sold my house with full intentions of quitting my job (i never had the chance...), yet the very day of signing my acceptance of the offer, i began to go blind. weeping and still barely able to see, i packed all of my worldly goods. i wondered how on earth i would get myself to that cabin in W.Va. to finally write those kick-a$$ books (the formal education would have to wait...).

nearly broken, frightened, and barely one week after moving in with relatives, the neurologist cheerfully announced a diagnosis of m.s., and smilingly added i could expect perhaps 15 good years. he had his script pad at the ready for medical marijuana and interferon, a medication administered by injection. two attacks and two months later, it was not so cheerful and everyone was busy wondering which flowers to send to my funeral. i was 500 miles and a border away from the cabin, and could not drive. after crawling in to confer with a naturopath, things began to improve, and i visited anyone and everyone who might help me to heal myself - everyone it seems but a witch doctor. after one year of injecting myself with a now 24K/annum drug dependency, and suffering with a resulting skyrocketing blood pressure, i ceased taking all allopathic medications. afterall, heart problems and i were no stranger, having arrived in canada at age 5 to be cared for by sick children's hospital for what british doctors told my mother would be "my end".

m.s. means "multiple scars" and emotionally, i could understand part of the origins of my disease.

two months ago, symptom free since those first dire weeks of attacks, i drove my car to work after my two year hiatus. i half-joke about my nobel prize for curing autoimmune conditions.... and my dream is every bit alive, although just a tiny bit modified. those mountains are now mesas, and i've done everything but find the spot to buy my home. all i have to do now is get my a$$ to sedona for good, not just for visits. and write kick-a$$ novels.

call call it providence, divine intervention, God, the universe, karma, my comeuppance... call it what you will. had i not chose to marry at 18, what on earth would i write about :P

:) so, no!, my path is the way i choose it to be. i would not change it for a single nano-second.

Answer 2

I struggle with decisions in general....whether they are tough or easy. The less there is on the menu, the better off I am. It seems no matter what choice I make, I always think it is the wrong one. Perhaps I suffer from "the grass is always greener" syndrome. *shrugs* I don't know. That being said, the 'toughest' decision I've ever made is the one that I didn't make at all. The one I let someone else make for me. *sigh* And, believe you me, if given a "do over", I would do it all so differently. Maybe I would grab hold of the reigns and take control over the situation. Perhaps I would be stronger and see the big picture a bit clearer. Then again, if I sit and worry about the "what ifs" and the "should haves" I would just drown myself in gallons of wine and dream about a life I *could* be living. *takes a slow and steady sip of her "robust red"* dammit...too late. :(

Answer 3

You should worry about yourself, and where your taking your life. If you feel like you have no chance at getting back with her, then why waste your time staying? If you have no job, the navy is a very smart choice. You receive so many opportunities when you join a service! If things are "meant to be" with this girl, then they will work out in the future. But you should never wait around or put your life on hold. Everyone needs to be a little selfish sometimes! And don't forget that an ex is an ex for a reason!

Answer 4

I think the biggest decision I had to make in my life was what career path I should take from High School onward. I knew I had exceptional musical talent, but I also knew I could do anything in a technical or science career. The computer, research, or medical fields would have all paid off very well for me. For some reason I fealt a music career would be more rewarding, and the money wasn't important. Having grown up in a poor family I never realised what money could do, and how much it impacts your life. It took me until my late 20s to realise how stupid I was to pursue music as a career, especially since everyone in my family was against it, and was just waiting for me to fall on my face and change career paths.

Answer 5

Do what again, specifically? Live my life differently? Absolutely not. Everything turned out, in the end, the way I wanted. There are a few things going on right now that I don't like very much, but I know that eventually I'll look back on it someday and realize that it WAS a good thing that happened, even though I didn't think so at the time. When you're faced with a difficult challenge that's causing you to really struggle badly, think a year -- or less, like a month, or a week, even a day -- ahead and see how it could come out. Chances are eventually you'll work it out. You just have to have faith in fate and in God if you believe in God.

Answer 6

I could say yes because frankly there were a lot of times in my life that were sheer hell but as far as changing anything that I had control over- nope..besides all of your past gets rolled up into this wonderful stuff that makes us who we are today..if things were different then - we would be different people now - best thing to do - take the good, leave the bad, learn your lessons and then move on, become better- oh and don't make the same dumb mistakes twice *LOL*

Answer 7

Any toughest decision, if required to be taken again, would be far easier than it was earlier, since we now have an experience about it ! It is about the 'decision' not about the choice of action or inaction .... choice is situation dependent !

Answer 8

my toughest decision was to keep my daughter when I became pregnant with her and YES, i would still keep her odviously. Single or not, she's definately a blessing..

but i do wonder what would have happened if i went for the career? i KNOW i would have done extremely well.. but, then again, there's still time!

Answer 9

I wouldn't change a thing because all the decisions I made in the past (right or wrong) have shaped who I am in the present.

Answer 10

I look back and see all the things that I've done, all the places I've been. I see the things that I could have done differently and the things that I shouldn't have done at all. But that is hindsight.
"If I only knew then what I know now".

Answer 11

Yeah, albeit very slightly. I'd lay off the junk food (I'm 80 lbs. overweight and I still have a ways to go) and have better planning in college when I chose my major (history).