Why can't I have an orgasm when having sex?

Question

I've have sex with over five different women and I've never been able to orgasm once. I've tried different positions. I've tried hand jobs, vaginal and oral. I've tried lubes. I've tried with and without condoms. I still can't seem to come when having sex.

I have no problem having an orgasm when masturbating. On average, I masturbate about four or five times a week.

I'm 28 y.o. and I'm in good health.

It's embrassing and I don't know what else to do.

Answer 1

The problem is you masterbate too frequently and expect sex to feel the same way. This is backwards. Stop masterbating and learn to have orgasms through sex.

Answer 2

Most probably because you're so used to masturbating. Ur mind only seems to know and want the pleasure of your own hands. Break the habit and retrain ur brain. And try no to have too many partners. Ur brain might be able to transmit the right messages to your penis if you focus on one partner. Also it is safer than having so many. U might catch some disease that u never wanted. Be protected by using a condom all the time.

Answer 3

If you feel to pressured to orgasm that can cause a problem. Also not to make you feel embarrassed but you could be masturbating too much. Try to cut down. Also while you are have sex try to think about the thing you do while you masturbate. If you watch a movie try that. Also Trojan and Durex make vibrating cock rings that may help stimulate you to orgasm. But I think one of the main things you may need to do is relax and enjoy the sex and don't worry about it.\ so much. GOOD LUCK!

Answer 4

I had that problem when I was younger. It's some sort of emotional block, I never knew exactly what. But once I found the proper girl, who I felt comfortable with, and could get that Nasty feeling with, It worked fine, and has ever since. She made me feel like she was mine, and I could "take" her. I dont know, she knew how to make me feel the right way. and btw, it's not the masturbating.

Answer 5

Ok, so, are you nervous around women? What do you fantasize about when you masterbate? Are you able to fantasize while with your partner? Do you find that sex is more work than pleasure? Do you have any negative feelings about actually having sex, or are you self-conscious about the way your body looks?

The fact that you think its embarassing is a clue, I think. I would say that the answer lies in what you're fantasizing about when you masterbate.

Answer 6

It is because you enjoy masturbating more than sex. If you masturbate alot after some time you enjoy to have sex less physicay and more mentally. I would suggest you cut down on masturbating or have more dull fantasies and enjoy the physical action.

Answer 7

Stress dear - pure and simple. One 'failure' leads to fear of failure, which leads to failure.

Firstly - find a steady partner that you feel comfortable and relaxed with - then lay off the 'chicken choking' for a week. Then, get down to some horizontal refreshment that does not always end in penetration - you'll soon get the hang of it!

Good luck

Dorothy Mills (Mrs)

Answer 8

I think the problem is that you are masturbating too much. Try leaving it alone for a week or two then have sex with your girl.

Answer 9

it must be a mental thing. first having sex with different people with out a condoms is very risky have you heard of aids? you are not in love that could be the trouble you should just wait till you fall in love and get married.

Answer 10

Maybe you are stressing about it too much and putting too much pressure on yourself. Have you tried drinking enough to relax, but not get smashed? Because sometimes alcohol can have the opposite effect on guys.