Cold, filmy drops of water fell steadily from the rusty faucet. The constant beat of them hitting the porcelain basin was rhythmic, like a pianist keeping time on a metronome. A stagnant pool of liquid had been slowly collecting in the sink for days; the leaky faucet had not been serviced in much longer than that.
Off in the far corner of the bathroom there lay a cracked shampoo bottle, its contents spilled and drying on the cheap linoleum tile. This bathroom scene screamed panic. Something wasn't right here. In fact, nothing had been right since that God-awful night several days ago...
Where do I go from here? I dont want to include anything with rape or like a teen missing her boyfriend or anything to that effect. I want it to be profoud, and good.
ideas!
2006-10-13 09:03:10 · 8 answers · asked by mandii20771 2 in Education & Reference ➔ Homework Help
What about someone who had been wrongfully accused of a crime and was on the run, using a fake name and inventing a new identity? They could have run out of the bathroom in a panic (maybe through the window) when they heard a knock at the door and someone calling their real name?
2006-10-13 09:11:54 · answer #1 · answered by Jetgirly 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Nice (Rough) draft! You took me right into a creepy situation without too much trouble. It does need a little polish, though. Pianists, for example, don't play metronome, but I get the idea. I think you might try having a stray cat in the scene, perhaps as the omly living thing there. He may be slat-sided hungry, matted fur jumping with fleas, and...maybe that is when the cat's owner wakes from the terrible beating he took at the hands of the thugs who had beat him a few nights before. No rape, no missing teen, but maybe a missing (place object here) that need recovery...or
perhaps the man is a cop, but the intruders had the wrong apartment and didn't know he was a cop until thay stole his shield and gun?
Nice start...have fun! I'd love to read this when it's done!
2006-10-13 09:14:34 · answer #2 · answered by The Mystic One 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That was a very well written paragraph, but I must advise that you plan out your writing BEFORE you even begin as to avoid encountering such problems. Perhaps it could be about an eminent event in your life (even if you pretend it is not about you) or the news of a loved one dying and the emotions elicited by this change. I had a short story that was about death, etc. and it was highly profound. My teacher loved it and I am sure that you would find it an easy topic with many possibilities. Good luck!
2006-10-13 09:48:58 · answer #3 · answered by Kollie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Expand on the problem you are going through now - that is your existing problem. For instance you could be overwhelmed by the amount of homework you have to do or you could be preparing for an exam and it has taken over your day to day living, you are in a panic because you have spent too much time playing and not enough time preparing. You could even include how your parent would feel if they find out that several nights ago you opened their mail from your teacher to reveal that you've been skipping school.
Good luck, hope this helps.
2006-10-13 09:25:09 · answer #4 · answered by edith 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The apartment/house was abandonned in haste.
Possible historical setting: Germany, Poland or Austria in a Jewish home in the late 1930's.
Modern day setting: Poor family or individual had to leave home in haste, after reports of a terrorist exploding a nuclear, biological, or radiological device in a populated city area.
2006-10-13 09:16:03 · answer #5 · answered by freddrick_flintstone 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It could be the night someone woke up there with amnesia. It could be the night a wife caught her husband cheating, or vice versa. It could be the night a teenager had a baby and threw it away, or the night a group of friends had a wild party and one of them overdosed... I think any of those would work as profound and dramatic.
2006-10-13 09:18:27 · answer #6 · answered by Just gorgeous dahling 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The orange, purple leaves have silently fallen from the timber long and grand branches. a number of them are even yellow, they cover the floor and often the wind selections them up then dances with them in all its bouts of frivolity. I kick on the determination of colours, they fly into the air and then the wind gets the gist of the pastime and rhythmic steps and strikes of the leaves in circles around me. i'm surrounded via a swirl of purple, orange, and yellow leaves flying approximately as dying spirits at last do, in seek of their heaven, maybe. The timber have resigned themselves to the cycle of existence, like geriatric sentiments that have compelled themselves into the minds of the pessimistic historic; the seen wish would not motivate exhilaration for them. _____ ----- _____-----_____ hi, enjoyed analyzing what you wrote. Watch placements of "commas and using the word "and".... additionally... based as to the subject remember or challenge understand which you're writing approximately - attempt using diverse phrases. some that are no longer as harsh as "drill & others" that i've got relpaced interior the above - remake. it quite is largely a beginning place to greater desirable assist you to in turning out to be a mature writter some day.
2016-10-19 08:27:21 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you could go with a kidnapping, a fight, a child left home alone, an old person left alone, a cat scared out of it's mind (hey, it is Friday the 13th so...)
i can't wait to hear how this turns out!!
2006-10-13 09:06:34 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋