Okay Me and my husband have been together for 5 years and married for 2 now. We are still very much in love and are expecting our first baby any day now. He just recently started a new job, closer to home (he is an engineer) and said the work is easier but a lot more of it. We just got news that the baby could be here anyday now instead of 3 weeks (because Im supposed to be 37 weeks). Since we got that news he seems to not want to be intimate with me. I mean he will tell me he loves me and gives hugs and kisses but no sex. I asked him about it and he said he has just not been in the mood, he is stressed at work and so on. But I also know he is a little scared about me going into labor. I know its not cheating because we are to close and I know he wouldnt do anything like that, I trust him more than anything. Do you think its just stress or is he not wanting to have sex because he's afraid he will make me go into labor? Has anyone else gone through this?
2006-10-13 08:51:35 · 14 answers · asked by ? 4 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
i know that i am probably just being emotional but its bothering me.
2006-10-13 08:52:53 · update #1
Yes me when my wife pregnant.
He's afraid of hurting you or the baby, after all if he does have sex with you and something bad happens then he'll blame himself. He's knows in his mind that it wouldn't hurt you or the baby, but why take the chance? Now add the the stress of a new job and ....
So, if you can get him to relax and you take charge who knows ;)
Good luck with the new baby
2006-10-13 09:07:52 · answer #1 · answered by Richard 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's alright! It is stress! Men almost go through as many hormonal changes as we do. Just bring up the fact that life in bed has gone by the wayside and you want to know why? Tell him that he won't hurt the baby if thats the case. HOWEVER if you have started to dilate, don't do it! But it could also be the stress of starting a new job and having another mouth to feed. Don't read to much into it sweety! He'll come around, just wait till baby comes..good luck and congrats!
2006-10-13 16:00:20 · answer #2 · answered by Pandora 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok...well I'm at 39 weeks...and I haven' t let my husband near me for the fear of not so much going into labor...we want that...but I think we'd both be seriously tramatized if my water broke during sex...or the mucus plug worked it's way out during sex....if he's been reading any pregnancy books at all these may be some of his concerns as well...he may also just be worried about hurting you....I finally gave in to my husband this morning...and it was no easy feat just getting into a position that worked...(TMI I know...but I'm just sayin)
Don't take it personally...but do keep the lines of communication open...understand that if this is a first child for both of you ...and even if it's not...there are alot of scary things running in the back of both your minds...don't worry...talk to him...but don't badger...especially if you know your relationship is secure and everythings good...he's probably just worried about "breaking" you or "hurting" the baby.
RELAX :)
2006-10-13 16:17:46 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
At first my fiance was really freaked out about me wanting to have sex while i was pregnant. He kept asking me over and over "are you sure its okay? Are you sure the baby will be fine? Im not going to hurt you or the baby? You're sure?" constantly.
He is probably just concerned for your well being and the baby's. You should be glad that your husband cares for you two that much. You could assure him that everything will be fine with the baby and that it does not hurt him or you, and this might change things a little.
2006-10-13 15:54:40 · answer #4 · answered by Barbi 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have not gone through this but I do know that men sometimes feel afraid of having sex when their wife is pregnant in case it harms the baby.
Also there are some that think since the baby is almost ready to be born it is wrong to have sex because it will know!! Very odd I know but guys have some wierd ways of seeing this stuff. My husband doesn't know much about the female anatomy. Thay just don't know this stuff bless them.
2006-10-13 16:00:23 · answer #5 · answered by JAM 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He might be worried that having sex will hurt the baby. i was just watching a show about that, and i guess its a common thing with men. my husbands friend is the same way. he wont have sex with his wife cause he thinks it will hurt the baby. actaully it doesnt affect the baby at all. and also, having sex can possibly put you into labor. its reccomended to try to have sex to induce labor but you both have to have an orgasm . semen has progestern in it that stimulates contractions. i would try to talk to him. tell him you really want to be close. or better yet. try to get him into the mood. back rub, candleligh, soft music, etc.
2006-10-13 15:56:44 · answer #6 · answered by faiths13 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I freaked at the idea of having sex with my wife when she was
in the last few weeks and I could not shake the silly notion of somehow harming the baby... which I know is impossible but it just seemed like I was invading sacred territory or something and the idea of having sex did not appeal to me in the least and I would actually try to get out of it... Dumb I know but ya can't change a gut feeling....
2006-10-13 15:59:22 · answer #7 · answered by RiverRat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It might be because you're as big as a house. You have to realize that 'being intimate' is not the same for a man and a woman. A man is more turned on by the physical aspect of sex, while a woman is more turned on by the intimacy.
2006-10-13 16:01:16 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
It's everything that you said; new job, more hours, first child on the way and your first pregnancy. That's a tall order and a lot of changes in a short amount of time. Both of you need to take a weekend and just cuddle and unwind.
2006-10-13 15:57:54 · answer #9 · answered by Brainiac 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
aaahhh bless him. i think hes just concerned he might hurt baby what with being so close to delivery. Men are funny creatures sometimes. Why not simply talk to each other, its the most vital element of a relationship. U have to be able to discuss anything.
Good luck
2006-10-13 15:54:59 · answer #10 · answered by Serry's mum 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋