My mom is perfectly okay with my brother marrying outside his race. But my white boyfriend is not acceptable. I am suppose to sit around and and wait for a black guy to be interested in me. I disagree I have a great guy who treats me well and I him and we have so much fun. I love to read and so does he. We both love science and nature. I don't really know any black guys who are into that stuff and I have always loved dating white men. So I ask why should she call me all kinds of names because I date outside my race when my brother has been a male whore his whole life and that's okay because he is a man?
2006-10-13 06:23:48 · 13 answers · asked by CollegeDropIN 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
Well I have the same problem with my mom. They feel that white men just want us for sex. Or that we think we are too good for black men. We should be happy with scaps like they did. Do what makes you happy. She is probably jealous because she can't find that kind of happiness with a black man. Most black men are hoes and they will screw anything that will let them even other men (you know about that whole "down low" situation with black men now don't you?). I think white men are more responsible and that's what I want and have. I am responsible, educated and hard-working and well spoken and so is my man, who just happens to be white. Don't settle marry him and have a great life.
2006-10-13 06:38:40 · answer #1 · answered by Love United 6 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Your question is very interesting; Chocolate. What I don't understand is your mother. She seems to think that whatever your brother does is ok,but your not suppose to break some type of "Golden Rule?". I hate to say this,(but) someone needs to smack her back into reality. What's the difference in you dating Caucasin Boys,in him dating Caucasin Girls?. You'd probably have a better chance in your date,then he would in his,simply because "she" will more than likely cheat on him,the first chance she gets (and I don't care what the other's on this site says about that!). Your mother has probably been "subservient" to men; being there at their every "beck and call". She may also be jealous of the relationship you have with your friend. She should be supportive of whomever you choose to be with,just as long as he is not abusing you!. Mothers and Daughters should always stick together,and never let "ANY MAN" come between them. With her calling you names (and I can imagine which one's she's using), is making matters worst for her. She will fell very bad,if you stopped speaking to her. Tell her how much you care about your friend,and that your brother is no better than you!. You both came out of her,the same way!. (Get Deep!). Tell her to stop thinking,that boys are better than girls,come out of the dark age,and start living for today,and leave those "old fashion" thoughts behinds. (Now) As far as "Black People" having double-standards,it is not "Black People" who have this issue in point, "IT IS YOUR MOTHER"!
2006-10-13 06:46:07 · answer #2 · answered by Squeakers 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think you should ask your mom why she has a double standard. I do not think race should be an issue at all in any regard except perhaps for medical history.
There are many people outside the "Black Community" that are eager to hear what you find out with this question, as some have been asking the same question for years and told to mind their own business. Of course, I would also like to know why so many Europeans have a double standard on human rights, and why so many Hispanics have a double standard on crime, but those are questions for another time.
2006-10-13 06:30:13 · answer #3 · answered by wizard8100@sbcglobal.net 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
It's not just black people who feel that way. Whites seem to have the exact same problem going on. I don't think people will ever be able to get over this race thing which is very sad. When will these bigots realise that people are the same whatever their color and if you choose to be with someone who is "different" then why should it even bother anyone else? It's your life, just go ahead, be happy with your choice and if someone doesn't like it, tough!
2006-10-13 06:37:58 · answer #4 · answered by cazzi_g 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well, your mom is your mom, but it is up to you who you spend your life with. It is hard enough to find a decent relationship now, without your mother putting a damper on one that works for you two. Go for the guy & hope your mother will catch up to the 21st century.
The other thing is that the race of the baby depends on the father. If your brother reproduces, no matter what the mother is, the child will be deemed black. I learned that the first time I saw a very light blonde child who is technically a black child.
2006-10-13 06:30:28 · answer #5 · answered by fairly smart 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Honey, I don't think this double standard is only a black problem.It's a shame that your mother feels the need to call you names,because of who you're dating.I don't know how old you are,but as soon as you can,I would move.And if you're already out of the house,then you need to set some rules down.Until and unless your mother can stop calling you and/or the man you love names,then you aren't coming around.I know you love your mother,but no one has the right to put you down.If you're still at home,then don't listen to what she says,and just tell yourself,you're better than what she saying to you.Stay strong and stay proud,but most of all stick to your convictions.If you love this man,he treats you good,and you love him,that is ALL that matters.
God bless you.
2006-10-13 06:38:37 · answer #6 · answered by LEJIANE 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Don't marry, join the Air Force.
The issues you face are the same all over the world. Japanese want their daughter to marry Japanese, and it is the same with Vietnamese, Koreans, Chinese, the middle east countries and the so called royalty of Europe.
In some villages, they even abuse the female if she marries outside of the village. And you need to stop trying to qualify issues based on RACE?
2006-10-13 07:40:10 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
That sucks. My entire family with the exception of a few stragglers who I see once every five years accept my husband who is 1/2 caucasian and 1/2 vietnamese. We've never had a problem.
Sorry you mom is prejudiced. I wouldn't worry about it. Just life your life. Can't please everyone all the time.
2006-10-13 06:53:02 · answer #8 · answered by 11:11 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am very sorry that you mom is giving you such a hard time. However, sometimes it is like that in many families they have different ideas for the boys vs the girls. Just keep your chin up it really should not matter who you love as long as they are good to you. God bless you and I hope it gets better for you. Just keep in mind it is your life. She will eventually come around if she sees that you are not going to change your mind. Good luck
2006-10-13 06:31:15 · answer #9 · answered by ? 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
i don't think that black people are the only ones with that double standard....What it sounds like to me is that your Mom is like lots of moms........she lets her son do what he wants and the daughter can't.......But the fact is you are an adult, and if the guy is what you say he is marry him and don't look back.......
2006-10-13 06:28:16 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 3⤋