Going out with this girl for about 5 months. She has many people fancying her. One other guy is still in the picture. She hasnt told him that she's decided on me. Said once that she feels guilty that she's been 2 timing both of us. Sometimes , she doesnt pick up the phone when i call. I've seen that she does the same to him , when he calls and she's with me. She says that she wants to marry me, although she has not told him so. she said that she did not have much contact with him nowadays.
The present problem is that I cant seem to talk to her if something she said or had done has upset me- she gets upset and does notr seem to want to see my point of view . Otherwise, she's very caring and loving. if i say that i would like to talk about something 'she gets very defensive. The end result- she tells me that she's upset with me. What should I do ? I love her. How do I make her understand? All I want is for us to have a very open relationship- able to talk to each other about anything.
2006-10-13 06:00:02 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Sounds like to me she is playing the two of you.
2006-10-13 06:02:32 · answer #1 · answered by ©ubs Fan™ 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
In your question is your answer. From lif experiences I've found with no exceptions that when someone gets defensive like you describe they are hiding the truth from everybody and especially themselves. If they take and turn things into an attack instead of being looked at they feel in control and that way they keep up the decites. Remember not saying things sometimes is the same as out and out lying. If she really wanted to marry you she'd be proud to tell the other guy. Sounds to me she's actually only in love with one person-----herself
2006-10-13 13:09:15 · answer #2 · answered by idiot 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dude, you are so being played, but you already know that. Why don't you care? She gets defensive when you want to talk because she wants it all, and she knows that you want her to yourself. And you've let her get away with it for 5 MONTHS ALREADY, so she doesn't understand what the problem is. She's got her cake and eatin it too. She doesn't want to marry you. For if she did, she'd have told her other guy already that you don't care that she keeps around. It's time to give her an ultimatum....and sorry, she's not going to give you the answer that you want to hear. She is going to make it feel like your fault. She will blame you for being to controlling. And the bad part is, is you deserve to be. Nothing wrong with wanting to have a girl all to yourself, unless she doesn't...........
2006-10-13 13:10:04 · answer #3 · answered by frigidx 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like a guilty person being defensive. And it sounds like she is burning the candle at both ends - and you are letting her - if you want an open relationship - sounds like you have one - i would think about closing the relationship some with an altimatum - you or him? make her decide and be honest with you and the other guy.. if she cant do that you should move on - why keep taking it?
2006-10-13 13:13:50 · answer #4 · answered by beachnut222000 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like she has a lot of issues. I would consider the many red flags that you have with this relationship. She's just not ready to commit, make up her mind, or be in a healthy relationship.
2006-10-13 13:02:46 · answer #5 · answered by Justsyd 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She's playing you BIG TIME! you don't need someone like that. Move on and find someone whose into you, you seem like a good guy so it won't be hard. Don't let a skanky girl mess with your head when you can find a nice girl who won't
2006-10-13 13:04:27 · answer #6 · answered by Jersey Style 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess it's best to give her TIME. Take things easy.. don't force her to talk things out. Everything will be resolved. Don't get too touchy if she isn't caring sometimes. Just take it easy and she'll be okay.
2006-10-13 13:03:58 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
she isnt willing to give you an open relationship. part of dating is to date lots of different people so you can find out what you like and dont like. you dont like this about this girl, and on top of that, she isnt honest. you need to go find a new girl who's willing to communicate.
2006-10-13 13:03:52 · answer #8 · answered by Surf n' Snow 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Many fish in the sea! If you're lucky, you'll find a mermaid.
2006-10-13 13:09:00 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
kick her A S S to da curb
2006-10-13 13:02:31 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋