he is having a lot of issues at work.i told him what that has to do with us having sex?? if he have sex with me afterwards the problems will be still there.i told him either he is gay or have a girlfriend.what do you think?
2006-10-13 03:40:36 · 50 answers · asked by holla 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Hes just bored of you ugly ***. Leave the poor guy alone, your lucky he's still with you.
2006-10-13 03:42:36 · answer #1 · answered by MazdaMatt 5 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Well i thought u was the girlfriend but on that note, I think he is bullsh***ing u. I think if he is having a bad day most men WANT to come home and make love or fu** your brains out to releave the stress. I really hate to say it but it sounds like he could be having sex with someone else because has all women know, men sex drives are off the chain and if he got a women who is trying to have sex with and he already pisted off then what's the problem. Most men find that to be a part of release therapy. I would start asking ?'s., but i don't want to stear u in showing signs of insecurity, but what the hell, he aint giving u no feed back on what u need to do or what needs to be done for the relationship between the two of u. So ask him straight up is there anyone else or if not them tell what is wrong, is it me, have u lost interest in me or the relationship. Do we need to try different things, are u bored. What the hell! Is it something that u want to tell me? (ask him). Do we need to seek help because has much as u try he's not telling u anything and if u don't want the relationship going sour then i might have to seek some help so that maybe the real thing will come out and not saying that he's cheating it could be much more then that and that's what were going to hope for. Good luck!
2006-10-13 04:43:23 · answer #2 · answered by the real deal 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
"You can catch more flies with honey than you can vinegar" meaning if it is truly his work that he is having stress with then maybe by offering some encouraging words and solutions rather than hurtful words may get you what you want. Ask him what you can do to help him feel more in the mood to have sex with you. This may be a situation where you need to step forward and make an effort to help him instead of bringing him down. I don't know how long you have been married, but I can tell you this one thing. If someone continued to talk to me like that I would not want to be around this person or have sex with them. Does he say hurtful things to you too? Sounds like it may be just more of a matter than stress at work if you are indeed talking about your husband like this. WOW! I have never heard such disrepect someone saying, You are either gay or have a grilfriend". How old are you? This doesn't sound right to me. Grow up and stop being so selfish and start thinking about someone else besides yourself and your needs. Help him!!
2006-10-13 04:01:26 · answer #3 · answered by hehmommy 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think your judging him too harshly. Stress does ALOT of things to a person. If you are a healthy, clean and willing person, Then it must be a him. Now, I'm going to tell you this right now. I'm a HUGE horndog. I just adore making love, and oral is not only my favorite thing to perform...I'm pretty talented at it. If I don't want to have sex with my partner there is only a couple reasons.....I'm sick, stressed, or I don't want to. If I don't want to, there is only 1 reason. It's her. I will have sex no matter how much I've had it that day, let alone just with someone else. I have refused sex for someone not being clean (as in not showering) rarely but have, depending on the origin of the dirtiness. lol But , and I know you might think of me as an *sshole but I'm just turned off by obese people. My ex, once she got married, decided she didn't have to take care of herself and let herself go. She felt "I have my man now so I don't have to work at it anymore". Well, she became too big and I refused to have sex with her. She didn't taste as good and clean as she used to, nor smell as good. I talked to her politely and as a caring and loving husband, but she got pissed and refused to do anything about it. I'm sorry for the babble, but my point is, don't just jump at the conclusion that he is cheating. First try to discuss what is happening at work and see if it sounds like he's really stressing about it and why. Then if that seems ok, then ask him if he believes that you are the reason. Make sure he knows he can say things that might hurt your feelings and be ok with it, or he'll never say. Then, and only then, when you've eliminated the internal things that may be reasons he doesn't want to have sex, then look into him having an affair...this way you know you aren't accusing without reason. Now for the lighter side, if you still don't get satisfaction, send me a note...I'll be happy to help out if I can. lol ;)
2006-10-13 03:59:27 · answer #4 · answered by flashpro 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why'd you go do that? lol.... men are very sensitive about their jobs... remember some men think that they're not men if they are not succeding at work. men most provide the food, kind of mentality. Well, does he work late? Always saying he's too busy for you because of work? If he does not do this then he does not have a girl/man friend. He probably REALLY does have a problem at work and doesn't know how to fix, so he'll keep worrying about it until he finds a way on how to deal with it... think about it, have YOU ever had a day when you just don't want him to touch you? And it has nothing to do with him per say, it's just you have too much on your mind. Give the guy a break, but if this continues for more than a month then start talking to your husband.
2006-10-13 03:47:26 · answer #5 · answered by antoinette m 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Work stress can dampen a man's sex drive and every man is different in handling it. If he has had some major work stress in the past and he was fine with having sex then he could have other issues at hand.
My ex was skittish about sex for a while and told me it was work stress and he need time to focus on his career. Well, his career wound up being a fat cow named Tenacia that he met at a convenience store while he was at work.
Just wait it out and he'll either get over it or you'll learn the truth. Good luck.
2006-10-13 03:50:04 · answer #6 · answered by The Steele's 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When men stress they become a little impotent. Which means they cant get it going, I dont know your situation but maybe this is his case. Perhaps he's having troubles at work and knows he wont be able to preform like he used to. Give him some time but use contex clues to see if he's acting any diffent. As long as he's still showing you some affection and love I dont there's a problem. But I think you should continute to help him with his work issues, talk to him about it, let him know youre there for him. After that I think he'll ease up and everything should be okay! GOOD LUCK!!
2006-10-13 03:59:26 · answer #7 · answered by ~* Pink Princess *~ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stress can affect the sex drive. I usually enjoy a good round of sex as a stress buster though, but some guys seems to rather worry about a job or whatever else than to worry about making pleasure for his SO and self! You may need a good counselor or a mediator if this continues to be a problem.
2006-10-13 04:23:47 · answer #8 · answered by David 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he is having problems at work then YOU need to back off. Problems at work can have an effect on a man's sexual prowess, leave him alone. What he needs right now is an understanding and loving spouse. I don't think he has that in you. If I were him married to you I'd probably either go gay or find a girlfriend.
2006-10-13 21:37:49 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's tough being in a relationship where sexual appetites are different. Does he at least acknowledge that there is a lack of intimacy? Does it seem like it bothers him? Maybe the stress of work is making it difficult to "perform" and he's a little embarrassed to talk about it. I wouldn't stress him out any more than he already is IF stress is actually the problem here. If you find that he's cheating then set him free!
2006-10-13 04:29:37 · answer #10 · answered by Georgia Girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hate to say this, but if he is having issues at work, then it can really interfere with you two having sex. At least until those issues get resolved. You should find out what those issues are and how serious are they really. What's his response? On the other hand, he might not be gay or have a girlfriend. He might be telling the truth. If you are suspicious, then check him. Look through his stuff when he's not around, especially his cell phone. Check any late calls or any reoccuring numbers. Also guys are slick, if he is cheating with a girl, her name will probably be under a guys name. But since he's your husband, you should know who is who in his phone. Drop by the office unexpectedly to bring him lunch to check what he is doing.
2006-10-13 03:47:27 · answer #11 · answered by Rica 82 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋