How much disappointment can one girl take?

Question

Has anyone else been disappointed so many times that you didn't even want to take a HPT even though you think you are pregnant?

I been having cramps for some time now and no period. I'm late but I'm scared to test cuz I know I'm going to be disappointed if the results read negative yet again. My husband and I have been trying since we got married. Each time I think my period is coming or I get a negative result I get upset. I just can't take the disappointment so I don't even want to test. Anyone else out there feel this way?

Answer 1

There is a reason for everything in life , relax and it will happen...Good Luck honey...

Answer 2

I know exactly how you feel. However, now I'm on HCG injections to help me ovulate, so I can't even take an hpt anymore because it detects the hcg hormone. This is sometimes a good thing, but it also means I have to wait until day 32 (4 days after my missed period) to get a blood test, which then takes another day to get the results.

My advice is if your cycles are pretty regular and your period is late, then take the test. If it is negative, you are just avoiding the inevitable. Information is good when ttc because if you know you aren't pregnant, then there are medications, like Prometrium (progesterone) that can make you start your cycle to help you start trying again.

You didn't mention how long you've been married, but if you have been trying for 6 months without any success, then I would make an appointment with your OBGYN. You don't have to wait a year to get help. There are some routine tests that your Dr. can do. It's also good to get an exam (if you haven't had one in a while) and go over the medical histories of both you and your spouse.

I also strongly recommend educating yourself. Many couples go into ttc blindly. They don't know when "their" fertile window is. Not everyone ovulates the same time each month, so using those ovulation calculators on line can be misleading. Check out fertilityfriend.com. In addition to charting your BBT (basal body temperatures), they have valuable information on signs of ovulation as well as the best times for sex to conceive.

As hard as it may be, try not to get depressed. Hopefully you will get a positive result. In the event you don't, you have options to help you. Best of luck!!

Answer 3

Yes, every 17th - 19th of the month. For the past 2 months my period was late and I was excited. I even spotted a little and then nothing. I thought I had all the signs, but then I took a deep breathe and remembered that thinking about it and worring about it has a negativve impact on your body and health. I thought to myself " I want this so bad I can already see my stomach getting big, and feel the baby kick." And I remembered that it is possible to trick our bodies into thinking it's pregnant. You stressing over getting your period each month causes all the cramping and no period. Me thinking I was pregnant caused me to feel all those symptoms. You need to take the test, get the result and then relax because tomorrow is another day. It will either be a day where you plan to surprise your husband with a "you're a new dad" card or a day where you tell your husband that you are sad and need to do something to cheer you up. If you keep stressing over it, it may never happen. By the way I have been trying for the past 4 years myself. I have one child from a previous relationship and it breaks my heart to think that the love of my life and I can't have children together, but i'm not going to let that keep me down from trying. I know that we have all this love to give and we can't let it go to waste. Please try and relax, I know it's hard, but it will do you a world of good. Remember that saying, when you stop looking for it that's when you find it? If you stop stressing over it, that's when it will happen.

Answer 4

I know all too way about the disappointment you are going through. My husband and I tried ttc for 4 years. Every late period brought on new hope; every negative sign brought on more tears. I got to the point I would be 3 months late before I would say anything to my doctor. I just couldn't take it month after month. Having my husband and family there helped, but you know they don't exactly understand what you are going through. If you are like me, I spent all my growing up years, thinking one day I will get married and have a baby, then when it didn't happen for me, but everyone else, including teenagers, was easily getting pregnant, I was devastated. When my doctor discovered I had PCOS (Polysistic Ovary Syndrome), I joined an online support group and it helped so much to know other women knew how I felt. You didn't say how long you have been married, but we tried for a year on our own before the doctor stepped in; then two years with her of drugs and such, then a year at a fertility center. You doctor should have some brochures on support groups for women feeling the same as you do; it will help to have someone to talk to that understands.

I am still disappointed at times and feel the heartache; I won't ever have a child because I had a full hysterectomy May '05 at the age of 31. But I just go on; you have too. You can't quit living. I really believe that God doesn't put anything on us that we can't handle; and we have a crisis in our lifes that is our test to see if we turn to him when we need him the most.

I wish you all the luck in the world, and I pray that you are blessed with a healthy baby of your own one day! God Bless you!

Answer 5

Hello. We have been trying for three years and I have had two miscarriages. It has been a whole year since my last miscarriage, which required a D&C, and still no baby yet even with the assistance of fertility medications. I usually wait until I am a week late to test for pregnancy and it is always negative. I too cry and become very angry as it just doesn't feel fair. Admittedly, my husband has to talk me into taking the pregnancy test each month as the disappointment just seems to hard to continue to bare. Therefore, I completely understand what you are going through and I think it's a normal reaction to something you want so badly. We should both stop being so hard on ourselves, stay positive, have hope, and know that someday we both will be blessed. Good luck to you and hang in there!!

Answer 6

I know exactly how your feeling. I'm going through it right now. We've been trying to get pregnant again for the last 6 months. I haven't had a period since July 25 and I've had sore breasts, crampy feeling for the last month, feeling sick to my stomach and still 3 negative pregnancies tests. Before we got pregnant with my son we tried for 5 years until it finally happened. I say you should take the test and put your mind at ease. I use to do that. I'd go without a period, I'd a take a test it'd say I wasnt and that night or the next day I'd start, but the one time I did it just to ease my mind it came back positive and it'll happen for you to and it'll be the greatest day of your life. Good luck and I said a prayer for you and the Lord is faithful..just remember its in His time not ours

Answer 7

yes there are alot of us out there that have went through that I go through it every month. I am 33 years old got married to my highschool sweetheart that I had been dating since I was 15 year old we got married when we were 22 yrs. old we didn't get pg. until I was 27 & I had her when I was 28 I still have only the one. I wanted 4 kids by the time I was 30 but since I'm 33 1/2 don't think that is gonna happen so right now I'm just pushing for 1 more before age 35 & I can't tell you haw many time I thought I was pg. & took the test only to be disappointed & to feel like a failure once again. I feel for ya! Trust me I do!

Answer 8

depends on how late you are... if you over a week and half late than i would say test... there is a good chance that you will get a positive reading. never give up hope and faith because the Lord will bless you with one soon when He is ready to give you one. Try not to focus so hard on getting pg because you body will tend to give you sign of being pg when you aren't. Stress too will cause you the heartache. God knows what you want and at this point in time he is not ready for you to have a child. Keep trying and keep up the FAITH and HOPE because without them you will have nothing...

Answer 9

I've had the same thing before. I know it sucks. On a happier note, I was also told that I couldnt get pregnant and now I am. After trying for 3 years it finally happend. Just be calm, take the test, I mean if you are pregnant think of how excited you will be.

Answer 10

This is my standard answer......... go get a book called Taking Charge of your fertility by Toni Weschler
This book will help you with all of your menstrual and conception questions. It’s for all women - not just women trying to conceive. It covers everything from temperature to mucus checking, etc.. It will help you understand your body and all the myths about it. It will help you time when you are ovulating and the best times to conceive – or not! It tells you how to figure out your cycle and what to expect. My husband and I tried for a year to conceive and nothing happened. The first month I used the book we conceived right away. Now I am due Feb 2. It's about knowing your body and knowing when you are fertile or not. You can pick and choose what you do with your info. Good luck and don't listen the all the myths!

Answer 11

You poor thing - have you been to your Drs yet? I think if you've been trying for a while you need to see your Dr for advice, tests and possibly advice and further help. Good luck.