My son lives with his father because his always been a daddy's boy and his grandparents spoil him, noone can fathom why I would let my first born live their?
2006-10-13 02:14:59 · 20 answers · asked by csaw3 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I think you show a lot of love for your child. Putting his happiness before your own, that's a real mom!!
2006-10-13 02:19:30 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are asking this as a question then either you are seeking to validate the choice you have made or are having second thoughts.
You have done a very hard thing and I am not sure that I could have been strong or unselfish enough to have made that choice. I hope that his father and the grandparents value and appreciate your choice for your son and it and allow you proper access and respect.
Your son needs his mother too. He perhaps has lots of the day to day care issues taken care of, but being a mom is way more than the washing and buying stuff. He will need your love,support and understanding too, so be there when he needs it.
It sounds like you have other children. Are you 100% sure that your eldest does not resent the fact his siblings stay with you? Does it set up jelousies with the other kids about his life compared to theirs?
It's pretty easy for people to throw rocks at anyone they think is a "bad mother". Sometimes mon's just have to be completely unselfish when it comes to their childs happiness. Sounds like you are. BUT a child's long term happiness and security with it's mother is way more important than than short term material things like toys and indulgences.
Thee is no right answer with this, you just do what you think is right, but take a long term view.
2006-10-13 02:29:55 · answer #2 · answered by Dancemomma 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I did allow my daughter to live with her father because she thought she would be happier there. I wanted what was best for her and at that time living with her father was best. However after 6 months she found "the grass wasn't any greener" at his house and that what she was looking for in her life was actually right here in her own back yard. She returned home and has been quite happy ever since. But I think the parents when deciding custody of children should take into consideration the relationship the child has to both parents, if your son had a better relationship with your husband then it would have been more difficult for your son if he lived with you. What you did, in my opinion was the right thing for your son whether other people can understand or not.
2006-10-13 03:09:34 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel you with this situation, I am going through the same thing with my son, he tells me how much he loves me and will never leave me, but he wants to live with his dad. I kills me to think he would be happier there, since his dad really hasn't been a part of his life until recently, but I know the right thing to do is to let him go with his dad, he will always be able to come back to me. This chance will help him discover who his dad really is and if he doesn't like it there, then my arms are open wide, no matter how bad this breaks my heart to let him go. Good luck with your decision, there are many of us mom's out here who feel like you about our children. Maybe your son will get tired of the material and have the need for emotional nurturing and realize he's not getting it there and want to come home.
2006-10-13 02:45:00 · answer #4 · answered by mariajd3 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes I would if I thought it was the best situation for the child. It's hard for a mother to let go of a child, but we make decisions because of the love we feel for our children, always putting their needs first. I commend you on being a good mother, you get two thumbs up from me. If others cant understand that, I wouldnt let that worry me, you just continue to do the great job that you are doing.
2006-10-13 02:37:23 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If there is no real reason for the boy to live apart from you and you know you can care for him in every meaning of the word I should fight to get him back. On the other hand you see that he is better cared for and has more opportunities at his father's he should make the choice himself.
2006-10-13 02:20:32 · answer #6 · answered by EC 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My children's happiness is first and foremost with me, if one of my 3 kids wanted to live with another family member and I knew that it was a safe move that would make him/her happy yes I would let them. BUT I would still be involved in all that they did like sports and school activities and support them in all they did. I see nothing wrong with it. It's sooo easy for other people to criticize and judge how other people raise their children but as long as that child is in a safe loving environment who cares??!! That's your business.
2006-10-13 03:22:56 · answer #7 · answered by mslo25 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think in life we all make choices some better then others if you feel that your son is safe well taken care of and happy then whats the problem are children should be our first priorety and it looks to me that you are making your son your priority more parents should consider there childrens feelings and happiness so many times we worry about ourselves its nice to know that you are doing what you feel is best for your son keep up the good parenting and kudoos to you remember always make good choices
2006-10-13 02:20:05 · answer #8 · answered by lisaisfunn1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was in that situation for awhile.. If he likes it there and if he's being treated good i'd say it'll be ok for him to live there.. I think he should live with you to even it's for a couple of days weeks.. It's good for the child to have both his parents..
2006-10-13 02:22:17 · answer #9 · answered by crazgrss 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he can do that how do you feel about it if he did its all up to you do you want to make him happy or do you want him to have the spoil thing to go on forever kids will go were thy get can get away with all kinds of things and be a lot happier and that's no good for them he can stay with you and learn good luck to you
2006-10-13 02:31:01 · answer #10 · answered by freeman3905@sbcglobal.net 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋