if your considering starting a family and your both still young and your partner goes out with his friends about twice a week is this still acceptable to do when you do have children?
2006-10-12 23:39:15 · 31 answers · asked by Pebbles 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
It depends entirely on the individual situation, but I would think that yes, it's probably okay. Particularly if your partner is working full time - he needs to let off steam and relax after a hard week at work.
The same applies for you too though. You should make sure you get to retain your social life and he looks after the kids occasionally whilst you catch up with your friends.
I think that having children shouldn't end a persons social life and I also think people need to spend time with mates, other than just their partner and children.
2006-10-12 23:43:25 · answer #1 · answered by Wafflebox 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I think that it's not only reasonable, but a must. Kids can drive you up a wall! (Believe me, I have four!) You have to have your own personal time so you don't forget who you are and how to have fun. Just because you decide that you want to be a parent, it doesn't mean that life as you know it has to end. Yes, you do have to be more responsible and take care of a child, but you do not have to only be a parent. You can still be you. If your partner is going out and you are not comfortable with it, you should talk with them. You should understand though that just because one person feels that life should stop being fun and exciting when you have children, it doesn't mean that everyone feels the same way.
2006-10-12 23:56:11 · answer #2 · answered by faierylady 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can see where everyone is going with the 50\50 thing but think about this. If you are both going out twice a week ther are four nights a week you aren't spending as a family:( Why not try a once every two weeks out with the friends...to a decent establishment. No bar hopping for parents, kids will see enough of that in the world without seeing it in their parents who should be their role models and setting good examples. One night out a week for you and your sweetie for quality time together. The rest of the time you should spend with your kids establishing a safe loving home enviroment.
2006-10-12 23:47:24 · answer #3 · answered by mary will tell you 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The days of going out with the singles should be OVER.....Your partner should not have the need to go out with the boys/ girls....once you have gotten married.
This is how relationships split....when one of the partners is still living the single life. Extra-marital affairs happen too when one of the partners is blinding themselve of the fact they are married now and have responsibilities.
I wouldn't dream of having children just yet. Someone isn't mature enough to handle the responsibilities of children.....and if you think the behavior will stop once children are born into this relationship you're badly mistaken!
Don't even consider getting pregnant!!!! Not wise....you're both to young and immature ......I would suggest waiting another 3-5 yrs....then ask the question again...chances are...even in 3-5 yrs your partner will still be going out with his buds!
2006-10-12 23:46:14 · answer #4 · answered by aunt_beeaa 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If both partners get two nights a week off to go out with their friends while the other partner stays home with the kids - why not? It has to be a fair and mutual thing though, not one partner going out all the time and the other one being stuck at home all the time.
2006-10-12 23:41:23 · answer #5 · answered by Liz 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why not? You should BOTH make time to see your friends and family and have fun. Trying to keep your partner under lock and key is a recipe for disaster.
Of course, depending on how young you are, you should be going out and having fun before you even consider having children. Why the rush?
2006-10-12 23:46:57 · answer #6 · answered by Katya-Zelen 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
when one has a family your responsibilities change. If you're both still young, why'd you consider starting a family?
There's nothing wrong with going out but if you're starting a family its probably best to have your mates over at your place or for all the family to visit the friends' place, in that way, if any of you needs the other (cause kids require back and forth trips to either pharmacy or store etc)...I wouldnt advise starting a family if neither of you are ready and committed enough, otherwise its just a forced situation which might end in resentment.
2006-10-12 23:43:19 · answer #7 · answered by Wisdom 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Going out with his friends means he is spending money getting wasted when he should be buying diapers, clothes, etc, necessary for the baby. Also, your entertainment money should be spent entertaining BOTH OF YOU, not just him. Very unfair. No, he should not be considering going out that frequently with his friends. Maybe once every two months or so, and limit what he is going to spend. What is his reason for going out with his friends? Is he continuing to look for love in all the wrong places? If you aren't pregnant yet, please don't get pregnant. It sounds like you will end up being a single parent with an absent daddy and no child support. Don't do it.
2006-10-12 23:53:20 · answer #8 · answered by Barbara W 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is acceptable to go out but i dont think that often is fair on the other person, who is then left with the responsibility of looking after the baby. Try and agree on days where you can each go out say once a fortnight you go out and once he goes out, that way you both get some space and time out.
2006-10-13 00:01:23 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not TWICE a week but ur not old... i think u should slow it down when the children arrive maybe once every now and then and of course both of u goin out from time to time TOGETHER i mean u still need me/ WE time...
2006-10-12 23:45:35 · answer #10 · answered by ~Niecee~ âË» âË» ♂ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋