my now x fiance finished with me 2 weeks ago and I really don't know why, he would not give me a reason. i can just about deal with that now but he up until yesterday has been texting me one minute saying he loves me and to f**** off out of his life the next but he is even telling people like his mum and my sister that he really loves me it just doesn't make sense! it is messing with my head so much, he is all i have ev er wanted and i love him so much! why did he ask me to marry him if he didn't mean it?
please help me understand him. thanks rachel 21
2006-10-12 22:50:20 · 29 answers · asked by rachel 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Ask him to meet you and discuss it. If he won't leave him, get a new cell phone and move on
2006-10-12 22:52:23 · answer #1 · answered by dumpllin 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he is emotionally disturbed. Thank your lucky stars it has happened now, and not after you got married.
Sit down for a while and really think what misery you would have endured with him as a husband.
I know it's hard when you love someone sweetie, but he has robbed you of all your confidence, and no-one has a right to do that.
Find a mate to go away with, or a group, even for a weekend, have a good laugh, and realise what he would be denying you, because the next thing, you would not be able to go anywhere without an interrogation process.
Then erase him out of your life, no matter how much he whinges and cries.
Who wants a man who treats you so badly then says he loves you time and time again?
Then, take up a new interest, have fun, enjoy your freedom, and find a real man who will treat you as if you deserve to be happy, because this one sure isn't!
2006-10-12 23:10:24 · answer #2 · answered by Thia 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will never understand him by the sounds of it! Sounds like you need to sit down with him and have a serious chat. Ask him why he says one thing to you and another to family? Maybe a break from eachother will help, ie, no communication whatsoever. He needs to be alone to realise is he just lonely or actually missing you? Good Luck. x
2006-10-12 22:54:13 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would just get on with your own life.
My mum and dad went through something similar, my dad had depression and didnt realise what he was doing and how bad it was, this caused a chain of events leading to my mum being very ill, she got an eating disorder, took pills and alcohol etc, it was really awful but once she started getting on with her life he realised that he had to make a choice if he wanted her because other wise she might find someone else.
so i dunno i hope ive helped, dont let him drag you doen with him, go out with your mates have fun and dont make everything about him.
Good Luck.
2006-10-13 00:07:56 · answer #4 · answered by kiki_dees 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He would come back at one stage to say "sorry and so on" it does not mean the relationship would continue as smooth as we all wanted. I am sure at one stage you both will sit down and talk all the elements you both need for the loving relationship. And you both will study more about relationship like everybody else.
In the meantime ... Have couple of deep breaths which would take you to the next step ... you will be fine ... take care x
2006-10-12 23:02:38 · answer #5 · answered by Vig 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Tell him your willing to put marraige to one side while you sort out what's bugging him,I think that he has got cold feet and is confused and he is taking it out on you because you are closest to him.You are only 21 plenty of time to get married in the future.
2006-10-12 23:31:26 · answer #6 · answered by MANC & PROUD 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry that he has hurt you this way! Next time he calls tell him you are going to take his advice and stay out of his life and by the way you have a date so you can't talk right now!
2006-10-12 22:56:37 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Talk to him and find out what's all the reasons behind these negative remarks. If finding out , he is not worthy for your love
then it is easy to junk him out and look for a better fiance.
2006-10-12 23:21:12 · answer #8 · answered by dodadz 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like hes terrified of the commitment of getting married. He probably does love you, but as shallow asit sounds, most blokes get the fear when they think that they will never get to spread their seed anymore. I think its just a primal reaction with many guys and they start to panic. Sad but true. Maybe just try and sit him down and ask him about it.
2006-10-12 22:55:35 · answer #9 · answered by Sir Digby Chicken Bhuna 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He does not mean it and is a jerk. Drop him, and don't respond to his emails. He is all mixed up and I would not want to get married to this abuser. He knows he is messing with you, and it is fun. Just realize it, and get the heck away from him before you wind up marrying this weirdo.
2006-10-12 22:53:21 · answer #10 · answered by shardf 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What I can make out of your narration is that your Ex fincee is of unstable mind. It is no point carrying on with him. Just break free from him and start to look for a better man with a clearer mind.
2006-10-12 22:56:48 · answer #11 · answered by mann54 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋