Such as a husband going out and having an adultress affair, Say you forgive him so you'll not carry the anger (a deadly sin) but How can you forget it was done and move on, especially if you still love this person very very much???
2006-10-12 22:34:31 · 16 answers · asked by Ladeebug71 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I should add we are seperated but he does want to come home and work things out but I'm just having an extremely hard time with the whole thing, and I am also fighting my demons as I do not believe in divorce, it's all very hard and stressful...
2006-10-12 22:50:19 · update #1
One can forgive just about anything but to forget what happened is impossible unless you lose your memory. It takes a strong heart to forgive and if you still love him and believe you can get past this to make it work then give it a try. There are many couples that have fallen off the horse and got back on to succeed. My father made a mistake and it hurt my step mother deeply. He regretted what he had done so much and she forgave him. This happened 8-10 years ago and they have been together ever since. It took time to heal and I'm sure she won't ever forget but she has learned to move past it. Since you mention forgiveness and not believing in divorce I can assume you are a spiritual person. To love someone and forgive them for such a mistake makes your heart even stronger. I believe you should take the chance to resolve and save your marriage. He will surely come to know just how lucky he is to have you and how much you love him. Good luck to you both.
2006-10-12 23:12:37 · answer #1 · answered by Laura R 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you still have doubts about him and your lack of trust in him is still aroused then you have not forgiven him. You might have told yourself and him that you forgave him but you really didn't. Because if you did completely forgive him you would be able to forget about the whole thing and not think twice about it anymore.Your anger is still there. You just thought if you told him that you forgive him that the anger would go away. But it hasn't, it is just buried deep with in yourself. If it was gone I don't believe that you would be asking this question. When you have lost all trust in a relationship it is very hard to rebuild that trust back. Well you know because you are separated. If he truly wants you back you should have him wine & dine you and get to know oneanother all over again and see if your trust in him will come back and also you will see if he still loves you and if he really deserves your love & trust for him as well.
Good Luck!
2006-10-13 06:13:36 · answer #2 · answered by bigred 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is possible to forgive any wrong doing even if it is something as serious as your partner having an affair but very few people are able to forget it. If you are to continue a loving relationship with this man then you will just have to accept your decision and carry on. It will take quite a lot of work and time for him to rebuild your trust in him because depending on your personality you may be constantly suspicious of his every movement. Anything is possible with perseverance. good luck
2006-10-12 22:47:15 · answer #3 · answered by AussiePete 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, forgiving and forgetting are two different things. U can forgive but u can't forget and forgetting is the hard part. U just have to make a choice not to bring it up or hold it over their heads everytime u get into an argument.
2006-10-12 22:46:00 · answer #4 · answered by cheetah7 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that would be impossible to forget - and for me, I could not stay with that person anymore. The only way to move on would be to get away. Good luck!
2006-10-13 01:49:53 · answer #5 · answered by Rachel 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can forgive, but you will never forget unless you have brain problem. It is mere academic to plead with somebody to forgive and forget a wrong done him/her.
2006-10-12 22:41:06 · answer #6 · answered by peaceman 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's like bottle glass .... you step on it with bare feet and it hurts after it cuts. You forget in time the pain but you still remember not to step on bottle glass. Time heals wounds...it doesn't erase them
If you can't forgive then consider forgetting him
2006-10-12 22:38:16 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
forgiving goes hand in hand with forgetting. if you can't forget what he has done to you, then you've not yet forgiven him. whenever you remember what he has done, stop and think of the good things he has done and eventually you will be able to really forgive him
2006-10-12 22:40:50 · answer #8 · answered by Lynn Rosemary 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that's very hard to do.."forgive and forget" easily said than done...if you think you can put up with it and it makes you happy to forgive him and be with him then do so....it's your call...did he come back to you after? be sure that he really means it when he asked for your forgiveness...once is enough, twice is toooo much....you have to let go by then..
2006-10-12 22:41:50 · answer #9 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its very difficult almost impossible to do so esp if you have thought about the topic in depth. Actually the more you think about it the more difficult it becomes if you really want to forget the act forget it dont think about it ....
2006-10-12 22:40:07 · answer #10 · answered by Sanjeev 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋