So here's the story....?

Question

He was walking along and flashes this group of women a flirtatious expression(I was looking right at his face).This particular group of chicas knew he was my hubby because me and our daughter had just passed them also on theway home and they were waving at her and smiling(we live in the same complex so theyknow we're a family).This behavior is both rude ,disrespectful to me and our relationship,and embarrassing 'cause like I said they knew he's my hubby.So he getsinside and I ask"who were you looking at?"..he lies and says he was looking upstairs.I ask two more times and he replies with the same lie.I tell him,"look me in my face and tell me you weren't looking at them".He gets outraged all of a sudden and tries to flip the table over,with our 3 yr old sitting at the table!He could've hurt her very badly!There were things on the table so he wasn't able to flip it,only lift it slightly and push it to the other end.Our child runs into the living room,scared and crying ..........

I'm repetedly asking him if he 's aware that he could've hurt her and he's not answering.I get angry and take his can of beer he just returned from getting and pour itoutand tell him to leave.He goes for my expensive perfume I just got in the mail for my birthday.I try to grab it and he punches me in the head.He drops it and goes for my expensive lotion and begins squirting it on the floor.He goes for another gift I just recieved and westart wrestling on the floor.He grabs my hair on each side with both hands and tries to slam my head on the ground.I prevailed to be stronger and I get my stuff from him.I also took his cash out of his pocketand tell him I'm gonna reimburse myself for the25.00 bottle of lotion he's wasted.and he can get out.This fight resulted in a pair of ripped slacks(his),torn out hair(mine),wasted money(both,but more on my end),and most of all another bad memory and example for our child .Ive let mychild& myself down again I'm distraught.Wat is your take on this even

Answer 1

He threw some girls a flirtious look. You asked why. He tried to flip a table your 3 year old daughter was sitting at. Hmmm... how soon can you leave him?!

Because, for me, the question of him trying to flirt with those girls isn't as important as what he did in response to your question. I think you should run for your life (or your daughter's life atleast). My mother has always been making excuses for my dad when he physically and verbablly abusing her; before he decided to launch against us. My fellow-sufferer younger brother is in jail doing time right now because of those times and my aunts (who were witnesses of the beatings) say it's a miracle we got away with our lives. But, ofcourse, not without scars. I know it's difficult to raise a child by yourself, however I'll never ever ever ever advise a mother to compromise the safety of her child, for WHATEVER reason. EVER!!

Answer 2

What are u two doing arguing in front of your daughter in the first place? No wonder it scared her off. Your husband is obviously going to lie about it as he knows u will be angry. Just calmly let him know that u know what u saw and tell him that u don't appreciate being disrespected like that, especially since these people knew u were his wife. What the hell was he thinking?

Another thing, your marriage is a very destructive one. He is being physically abusive at the same time. I would suggest u get yourself away from this situation as soon as possible. Your child is your priority and if this is the kind of environment she's constantly subjected to, then it can't be healthy for her.

Answer 3

you seriously need to consider counseling.. or maybe even a divorce.. If it was ME then i would get a divorce immediatly.. i know that sounds tough . but if he put my child in harms way he's got to go.. the child is more important.. my dad put me and my sisters through crap like that all the time.. even worse than that.. like beating my mom and crap.. she didn't leave till i was 12.. I still have problems coping with the past.. i wouldn't want my kids remember bad things like that..

yeah i just read the other info you added.. you need to call the police.. and get a divorce.. he is too violent and your daughter does not need to be around that.. if you don't leave you need to let your daughter stay with a grandparent or trustworthy friend or family member.. and get counseling and FAST

Answer 4

If you were in the same position walking home a married woman and a group of neighbor hood guys were standing there and they were smiling and lightly flirting with you and you smiled back hell its a compliment don't you think? Would you have liked to have that nice compliment and the way it made you feel made into an affair just because your spouse is feeling uncertain? Or just have someone in your face because of jealousy? I think you over reacted and I think he is borderline violent, but you already knew that if you have a child by him, are you one who regularly pushes her spouse into violence? You need to put your whole marriage into perspective dear he came home didn't he? he did not take one of them down on the sidewalk and do her did he? You are a drama queen I bet and he has a long hard journey ahead of him

Answer 5

High maintenance wife. Unnecessary and unfortunately corrosive drama. How about a nice, quiet, loving marriage where you cut each other a little slack?

How about me minding my own business? Hey, you asked; and my answer is not intended to be flippant. Read it again and see if you can't find something helpful in it.

Answer 6

kickin off about a look is a teensy bit over the top, his reaction is way over the top.

this sounds like a destructive and violent relationship with very little trust and respect.

you sound like a good parent and a responsible person - you need to think about what kind of role model you are being for your little girl - sort it out!

Answer 7

it would seem you instigated this through badgering because of your own insecurity within your marriage ..you need to determine WHY you feel insecure in your marriage.... certainly, counselling is in order here. a friendly look is not an invitation for infidelity ... you need to pick your battles and not create issues where there aren't any. while i agree that his reaction was excessive, i dont wonder that you drove him to it with your choice to make an issue where none exists and then to badger him to the point where he realized you were not listening to him but were instead trying to coerce him to validate your argument with some admission of guilt that was unrealistic. ... it is YOUR insecurity and reactionary choice to make an issue where none exists that is at issue here, not his actions which were just neighborly.

the bottom line is, he may have smiled at them flirtatiously, but he came home to you and did not engage them in conversation ... your unreasonable jealousy will drive him away if you keep it up. ... we ALL flirt, both men and women because it boosts our egos, it does not mean we wish to cheat ... however, if our spouse becomes irrational or shrewish, certainly, we would put more effort into the outside flirtiing if there is no pleasure in coming home. perhaps if your reaction would have been to flirt with him yourself instead of trying to make an issue where there is none, you would have been making love instead of sulking on the computer ... put your energies in a positive way toward your marriage and you will have a devoted husband, put them negatively and you will soon have no husband to worry about.

i just read the additional info ... you are argumentative and destructive, while i dont condone violent behaviour in a marriage, you two better get some serious counselling before one of you gets killed over STUFF. your materialism and jealousy is destroying your marriage .... who is sending HIS wife perfume through the mail on her birthday??? and you dont see that as disrespectful to him in the marriage?? you better decide whether you want to be married or you want to compete with your spouse over DIS-ing rights. neither of you is property of the other, it is a PARTNERSHIP, or should be .. i am glad that I am not married to you, you are nuts!! and you are a bully!! i dated a nutjob like you once and the first time she went off on me like that with verbal harassment, i threw her out and that was the end of that relationship ... good riddance ... respect is earned, you wont get it by disrespecting your husband for all the neighbors to hear, you just wind up looking like a jealous possessive moronic bullying shrew

Answer 8

You certainly know how to throw gas on a fire.

Getting in his face and saying the same thing over and over was not going to help

Answer 9

jinklehymer? are you serious?
get off his case. your hubby is allowed to act like a mature and experienced male around other females....simply because it would be humiliating for him to act real shy, and unfriendly to pretend he doesn't see them.
really, do you expect him to have to be horrible to everyone just because you are the most beautiful woman on the planet?
it was just a smile on his face. all you should worry about is that he cares about you and the children and he always comes home to your bed.

Answer 10

thats a good one what you need to do is call his mates over and do them all take lots of pics or do a video. and give him that for a present:) that will fix him good