My friend has being going around telling people bad stuff about me. I confide in her and she knows almost all my secrets and when anything bad is said about me, she goes and contributes to the gossip. These people that she gossips with, later come and tell me. What should I do?
2006-10-12 21:26:25 · 38 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Realize that this person is NOT your friend. Sorry
2006-10-12 21:28:44 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Its quite easy for alot of these people to say 'dump her' But if she's your best friend - then I assume she is for a reason and you should value that. However, you need to show her that this is no way to treat a friend.
How do you know she bad mouths you? Did your other friends tell you? Could they be jealous of you friendship? Your best friend may have confided in them but they may have twisted it slighlty.
Best thing for you to do is ask her straight if shes been chatting about you behind your back. She may be so horrified that you mentioned it that she will get upset and never do it again. Or she may say that she mentioned some things but nothing was meant in a nasty way. Trust her unless you are proved otherwise.
Or finally, she may deny it. If this happens and you know you have specifically told something only to her and now everyone knows about it, you have to confront her in a different way.
You could wait until all of your friends are together and say to her in front of everyone 'did you say this to that person' She will find it hard to lie infront of everyone because that would involve dropping someone in it. You don't have to end the friendship at this point but make it clear to her and all of your other friends there at that point that they shouldn't do it because its out of order. Mention also that you could tell everyone something about someone else to make them look bad but your not a nasty person.
Hope this helps! xx
2006-10-13 00:29:51 · answer #2 · answered by tamara19 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry honey, but it doesn't sound like this person is your best friend. It sounds like she is your friend when she wants to be, but when the **** goes down she will not be standing beside you in the fight. A best friend is someone who loves you and will defend you at all cost. They never tell your secrets or gossip about you with others. They may seek advice from others if they are worried about you, but never should they gossip about you. I know it is hard, but cut your losses. You should tell your friend you don't appreciate her talking about you. Another point is are they people telling you she is talking about you trustworthing or just stirring the **** in the pot? Things to consider, but before saying goodbye talk to them and see what they have to say, maybe they can be forgiven. Good luck!
2006-10-12 21:36:23 · answer #3 · answered by tiger4mel 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is not acting like your best friend, friends wouldn't treat you in that way, you should be able to trust a friend not worry about what she will be saying about you next and who to. You need to get well away from her, let her be friends with the other gossips and you find yourself a real 'best friend'.
I was in a similar situation about a year ago, and although i was really hurt at the time the best thing i done was to get away from her.
Good Luck!!
2006-10-13 17:38:25 · answer #4 · answered by talula 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You call her your best Friend.Do you have a better status than her earn more she is jealous as hell of you keep her on a long leash tell on a need to know basis. you have the winning hand and she hates it. dint start bad mouthing her.but just if she you has have some some dirt on her. pull her up just before you meet a load of your mates and just mention this bad thing and say you wonder what all her other mate would do if you mentioned it and look for a response then tell her to back off slagging you or else it should work but best mat i don't think so
2006-10-12 21:41:18 · answer #5 · answered by The tagg master 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is she really a good Friend? If you have told her things in confidence then she should keep them private. I would talk to her and ask her why she tells other people things. Also does she actually realise that the things you tell her are not to be repeated to other people? Some individuals are less sensitive than others. Hope this helps.
2006-10-13 00:27:30 · answer #6 · answered by lizzy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
powerpuff has got it. I would join in the game and feed her crazy stories adn laugh when she comes out looking stupid. Don't hang out with her for a while and keep your relationships short. When she gets so desperate she will come back to you and u can tell her how u feel. When u give her one more chance which i am sure she will fail then u can say u tried. If u don't want to deal with it at all just cut her off completely and hang out with new people.
2006-10-12 21:33:41 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's not a best friend, that's a back stabbing, jealous person not worth being your confident and friend.
Let her know you don't appreciate what she's been up to and cut her loose. She is the type that ends up with no friends because she does that back stabbing with everyone to make herself look good.
A trusted friend is hard to find, but when you find her, she will be faithful and true to you....
happiness and peace
2006-10-12 21:33:06 · answer #8 · answered by easinclair 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
That is not a best friend hun, it sounds like she is jealous of you in some way and wants to hurt you or it could be a case of trying to find common ground with other people and that common ground is you. I would seriously have it out with her and say just be honest and say you are an evil jealous vindictive ***** and I don't want you in my life. Hold your head up high and let it go.
2006-10-12 23:45:34 · answer #9 · answered by caroline b 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hunni, If your she bad mouths you to other people and contributes your private issues to gossip SHE IS NOT A REAL FRIEND!! Seriously girl, Ditch this biatch asap, find some friends who are worth it and who you can trust...Leave her behind, shes not a true friend if she does these things to you.
Good Luck!
2006-10-12 21:54:48 · answer #10 · answered by -Ashlee- Eeeep! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She aint your real friend. she is jealous of you and she feels thretend by you thats why she acts in this way. trust me. just show her that she dont bother you and next time she wants to be around you, tell her, "stop being fake with me, just go run about with your other mates, ca you bore me now, so just pi*s off!"
i am telling you now, when you get older you wont know half your "friends" that you know now, most of them are fake. YOur lucky if you got 3 or 4 friends, and i mean REAL friends. just get rid of her, she no good for your confidence or self-esteem. She rubbish. Never think she is better than you like she tries to make out, that is what she wants you to beleive. just ignore her COMPLETLEY. Goodluck.
2006-10-12 21:32:02 · answer #11 · answered by london lady 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋