Everytime he comes for a 10 days leave, she'll be always with him...forcing us to visit temples..and relatives. He doesn't seems to understand tht we don't have enogh time together. I can't say anything against her cuz he loves her a lot. How do I convince him tht he need to pay more attentin to our marriage. ?? Somebody pls help me..
2006-10-12 21:17:50 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Girl, u have to take control of ur life honey!!!. Marriage is all abt lots of love and little bit o adjustmest..I'll say u don't need to adjust all the time...but pretend tht u r adjusting. First do whtever u have to do to het ur man on ur side. Don't hold back the sex...it may cause problems...when he's abroad make sure tht u chat every single day at least for 2 hrs...and do everything to make tht time intimate. When he's at home...make him want u all the time. So tht he will be tempted to be with u...rather than listening to his mama dearest. Tell him openly how much u love him..and missed him. Make sure tht u r with him all the time...so that mommy can't even come anywhere near. And ur strategy shud be to go abroad and live with him. Good luck dear
2006-10-13 23:10:38 · answer #1 · answered by dragonfly 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think am in the same business as your husband and do acknowledge we can be insensitive some times.
Try to convince your husband that R&R is a time to recuperate but also to spend quality time with your family (wife and kids). So convince him to take some of those holidays with you and him alone somewhere else other than home. This would cost him some additional money but if he can do this once in a while it would be good. If he can't afford you making trips out of the country, then you can both go outside your home town and stay in a motel and spend quality time This way you can get away from the family.
2006-10-13 04:35:26 · answer #2 · answered by jackbauer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry that you are feeling left out of your husbands affection. I'm going to be a little harsh, but speak upon experience. You should have been able to view the relationship that your husband and his mother had before marriage. please don't try to change that, because you will only get hurt and hurt your husband. He has two very important women in his life now don't make him feel pulled. His mother is probably feeling as if she has lost him rather than gain you. Maybe you should focus on gaining her love and respect and build a relationship with her in your husbands absence. She will then see why her son loves you and grow to appreciate your marriage. I am guessing that you guys are pretty young. Support your husband threw this I promise it will get better in time. Plain dinners with time limits and invite her, try to include her in your plans before she makes all the plans herself.
2006-10-13 04:34:36 · answer #3 · answered by Michelle G 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You just tell him what you said here.
If you let her control your relationship.....it will go on forever.
Tell your husband that YOU need him and that mom needs to back off. Give her some time, but most of the time should be with you. Tell him that you can't maintain a loving relationship with him unless you have more time with him. When a man marrys , his wife is number one over the mom.
Don't let her ruin your marriage.
2006-10-13 04:30:07 · answer #4 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would try a serious heart to heart talk letting him know exactly how you feel, and let him know it's nothing against his mom that you just need more time.. if that doesn't work or even if it does.. try marriage counseling.. it's for good marriages and struggling ones.. a couple can always use 3rd person views.. and advice.... and maybe try having a heart to heart with his mom
2006-10-13 04:21:38 · answer #5 · answered by Lydia S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should tell her to respect your privacy while your husband is at home. He can still love is mother but are now married to you and that changes everything.
I am working away from home and this is my rules, my wife and daughter first and then the rest when there is time, and it is not a question of being nasty.
2006-10-13 04:44:26 · answer #6 · answered by B.A. 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should discuss this thing with him and try to convince him or else if you know any of his friends who has some influence on him then you can tell him or else if you are living in a joint family and if you have someone from his maternal uncle or so who can influence to both your hubby and his mom then you can get him in confidence and request him to advise them both...
2006-10-13 04:28:50 · answer #7 · answered by CosmicLight 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u miss him as a future hubby,she miss him as a son she sees from young till now
lots of mothers r like tat,give urself time to learn to understand her fear of losing her son's company to another woman and also give her time to understand her son is growing up n shd have more time with his own future family
most ppl have problems with in mother in laws n daugther in laws
close one eye,give in alittle cos she is old already,how many years more can she 'fight' the son with u
be an understanding daughter in law,well at least 'act' understanding,i'm sure ur hubby will appreciate it better than 2 women making him a can't breath sandwich
all the best to u
2006-10-13 04:25:46 · answer #8 · answered by Western 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't go with him when he goes off on his mothers instructions.
you must break the pattern.
you can tell him to his face you are tired of his mother controlling your lives....
let him go by himself. it's the only way to make him think about it.
if I was you I wouldn't even let her enter your house. I guess there's going to be a lot of drama, but if you are resolute you will eventually win.
2006-10-13 04:23:06 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be honest with him. Start planning a few things yourself for the two of you to do when he comes home! Don't let his mother ruin your marriage.
2006-10-13 04:20:28 · answer #10 · answered by janet r 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋