I have been married to this man from 10 years. I have been giving more to his name, fame, prestige and to the family more than him. I feel that I have given much much more than I ever got. I had bad times with my parents and now it is my husband. why is it so? is that my destiny? I have decided not to go after anybody( I never did that) Is it ethical to stay with him and still not love him. My husband pleads that I have to stay with him for the sake of our child (whom I love to death). How do I cope up with such a dull life.
2006-10-12 18:05:22 · 15 answers · asked by suman 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If you are truly truly miserable and there is no possible way you can ever work it out, then leave him. But try as hard as you can. A lot of it is mental, if you keep telling yourself he is great, eventually he will be. Do things that you enjoy and invite him to enjoy it with you, and vica versa. Buy the book How Full Is Your Bucket, read it, and try to apply its concepts to your life. Essentially, compliment him alot. If all goes well, it will make him feel good, which should make you feel good, and then he should return the favor by complimenting you. When there are kids involved try as hard as you can to make it work. But if it doesn't both sit down with the kids and talk it out with them. Make them apart of the process and don't make them feel like the problem. I am going to use a celebrity family to convey the concept I am trying to make. Look and Bruce Willis, Demi Moore, and Ashton Kutcher. They were able to make a clean break and all remain friends, and the kids understand. Try to achieve that, and look towards bigger and better things. Good luck!
2006-10-12 18:12:35 · answer #1 · answered by curly 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are a typical, brat, soiled princess that is just plain bored because the emotional roller coaster you love so much is stopped. So now, you want an affair or divorce or both ... just so you know you can still be the center of attention and drown in your precious emotions vs real life with your husband (who would in all likelyhood take a bullet in the face for you or your child) because you just don't feel the 'love' anymore....Just what do you think love is?? Dating? Candles and dinner? Stupid cards and flowers on valentines day? You don't have a clue what real love is because if you did you would'nt be on the internet asking permission from all the other whiney, high maintenance women if it's OK to split and party-down. You nauseate me.
2006-10-13 01:15:07 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
that is hard but if its for the sake of your children and your not happy then why would you want your children to see this??? What if they grow to hate (but not hate but I cant think of another word) you for not moving on and staying happy. I don't agree with separations but I don't agree with you not being happy. Maybe you should try marriage counseling so he can work on changing too, you once loved him and your life you just have to your way back to that to be happy if you want that again... Good luck
2006-10-13 01:16:07 · answer #3 · answered by Laprincessa1182 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i don't know about the ethical part but you do need to consider the child and put them first. What exactly are you missing in the relationship?
2006-10-13 01:14:04 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Think back to those times when he made you happy. Remember why you took those vows. You both stated "for better or for worse" This may be closer to worse, but talk to him so that you all can make it better. Pray about it!
2006-10-13 03:09:06 · answer #5 · answered by flwrgyrl 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What is going to make you happy? I was married for 11 years and finally filed for divorce because our marriage did not make US happy. If you can't live with it, then leave.
2006-10-13 01:35:26 · answer #6 · answered by Mitzi 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Lady, you have one life to live, god gave that to you, use that to make yourself happy also.
A relationship without love is meaningless, I do understand about your child, but what sort of environment do you want to bring up that child in.
I was in the same situation for 25 years, I know now that it was the biggest mistake of my life, we waste all our youth in that situation.
Better to seperate and both love the child then living together and not in love.
2006-10-13 01:13:49 · answer #7 · answered by ashok kumar 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
If you want to leave then do it. You shouldn't put your happiness aside just because "he said so". If you want to stay then stay. Your child will be happy in a happy house, not just because mom and dad's there.
2006-10-13 01:09:32 · answer #8 · answered by rowster 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you agreed to marry him, and now you have to stay, dont be another statistic
be responsible, you have a child to raise together.
2006-10-13 01:09:22 · answer #9 · answered by Fowl Language 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You do what you have to do. I respect you for wanting what is best for your child, but why live unhappy.. wheny you can create a happy life for you AND your child?
2006-10-13 01:18:00 · answer #10 · answered by cree siempre 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋