I have this friend who never respects me and does all these awful things to get me back. She treats me like a back up friend that will always be there waiting, shes awful. When we get in fights, its because she refuses to listen to my side of the story, and somehow twists it to make it seem like my fault. She says I expect her to do all these things for me, and I do. I expect her to be a good friend, i expect her to listen to me, I expect her to give a ****. And So I try to find ways to see if shes realy my friends, and she says that testing your friends are immoral!!!! can u belive that!!!! When we get fight, and she ends up saying sorry, its hard for me. you know to forgive her, its hard to let go of the memory of betrayal and she doesnt seem to get that. I know it seems like im just venting so heres the real wuestion. How can I save this relationship?
2006-10-12 16:52:53 · 17 answers · asked by furyfluf 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
YOU NEED TO START IGNORING HER, AND WHEN SHE TRIES TO COME TO YOU ASKING " WHY " FACE HER AND TELL HER THE TRUTH HOW YOU FEEL !!!! MAYBE SHE WILL UNDERSTAND AND MAYBE SHE WON'T. OR MAYBE IT'S TIME YOU FOUND ANOTHER FRIEND! GOOD LUCK.
2006-10-12 17:01:33 · answer #1 · answered by angus 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep a distant, that's probably the best solution. Even you know how to say she considers you as a back-up, a rebound when there's no one around. This is not considered a friendship, and even if it is, it's not one worth your effort in saving it if she does not participate. And from what you're saying, I'm doubtful she will even try.
You're so much better, really. No one deserves to be shoved and step all over that way. If she cannot listen to you without shoving untrue words in your mouth, it's best to keep an amount of distant between you both before drama unfolds.
I would not be surprised, either, if she's doing her little two-face scheme and trashing you behind your back. Personally, I would not even consider saving this pathetic, useless friendship. Why give when you never receive? It's selfish, yes. But with a friendship, a true friend would always return a listening ear or a comforting presence. She offers nothing.
2006-10-12 17:15:18 · answer #2 · answered by lilies_n 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You want to save the relationship? Are you sure? I had a toxic friend like that once, and after almost 13 years of hell with her, I finally cut the ties. It was painful at first, but in the end it was the best thing I could have ever done. My self-esteem went up, and my whole life just generally improved. You should be able to trust your friends. They should not be sources of stress for you.
2006-10-12 16:57:52 · answer #3 · answered by Jess H 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
God... if she keeps on doing that, then I'll dump her before she says her last sorry in my face. Grl, you gotta give yourself a break and save yourself time from such b i t c h y friends cuz they're not really worth it.
Don't save the relationship, more like break it before she breaks you totally.
Things to say to end her:
"If you're gonna be two-faced, at least make one look pretty!"
"God, here's something I expected too-- to say tata in ur face!"
"Sorry, but that doesn't bite it. You were never a friend, so leave me alone. At least i'm not a fake."
Just give it to her. There's no point if this situation goes on repeatedly!!! Her stupidity is making you go down with her too. She doesn't deserve a friend like you if that's how she's gonna treat you. TRUST ME.
2006-10-12 17:03:15 · answer #4 · answered by geml0vely888 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is what exactly happened to my high school best friend and now shes my Maid of Honor and she doesn't give a crap bout my wedding. Doesn't even help!!! I seriously would distant myself. I know its hard but it the end you will be better off take it from someone who has been there. She will never change or in my case she will get worse.
2006-10-12 16:55:50 · answer #5 · answered by RoryGirl2005 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Remember that love means never having to say your sorry. Is this relationship worth saving? What is your part in the troubles you are having? Have you sat down & expressed yourself openly with her about how you feel? And lastly, put yourself in her place & see what she may be feeling. She may have her own issues with your relationship. No relationship is easy. If they were, there would be no divorce, no runaways, heck no wars. Good luck in whatever you decide.
2006-10-12 16:59:44 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
im not quite sure it can be saved, I dont think she even realizes what shes doing to yoiu, maybe theres something that she isnt telling you that shes having a problem with. you only get one life long friend in life, so if she is yours, then teach her how to be a good friend and try and be as understanding as possible and dont necessarily put up with all of her ****, but try too and let her know that it bothers you but shes still ur friend anyways
2006-10-12 16:59:27 · answer #7 · answered by myerfreddy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Personally, I don't think a "friendship" like that is worth saying. Real friends don't treat each other with disrespect and twist their words around. Real friends love, listen, and support. If this "friend" can't do that, then they are not your friend - you are better off without her.
Best Regards,
Holly
2006-10-12 16:59:18 · answer #8 · answered by Holly 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
nicely, if this could be a case the place somebody is to be staring at over you mutually as your mothers and dads are away, then sure. possibly the chum did not ask her mothers and dads in a fashion that should signify you mandatory to be regarded after. If that have been the case, the mothers and dads would not enable yet another chum to take your spot. My guess is this chum did not even ask her mothers and dads.
2016-11-28 02:54:14 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find a real friend! Leave this friend behind you will be better for it.
2006-10-12 16:56:27 · answer #10 · answered by stormyjoem 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋