In a relationship, I often find that the arguments, bad emotions and breakups happen because of talking too much about everything (especially those things that are very negatively emotional). Most psychologists would agree that the problem is that we need to communicate MORE. Do you agree, or should we avoid talking sometimes? Explain.
2006-10-12 16:16:50 · 7 answers · asked by DN 2 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Communicate more. Try to remove the emotion from negative topics. Examine issues, not personalities. A lot of arguments get emotional when one person says or thinks "you always...".
Avoid talking only long enough to get your emotions under control
Problems don't go away when you avoid them.
2006-10-12 16:28:40 · answer #1 · answered by PAUL N 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you are a serial avoider of emotional situations. This says something about your personality and perhaps a pattern of unhealthy behaviors that you have by avoiding emotional situtations. You can't expect your partner not to discuss something if it is negatively emotional. ALL relationships have these issues and should have these conversations. Running from it will not help you in the long run.
PS: Talking isn't necessarily communicating. The quality of the conversation is important.
Avoiding talking isn't really useful, unless it is just to postpone a conversation until everyone involved calms down and can think rationally. I think you need to take a good look inside and at how you were raised and see why you have this pattern.
2006-10-13 01:04:51 · answer #2 · answered by prettyinpunkk 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If emotions get in the way of getting to the bottom of something - communicate simply and non-emotionally. It's also best to discuss matters when we aren't overly emotional - because you can definitely over communicate at that point, and that's just as bad sometimes if not worse because we tend to say things we don't mean.
Cool off, let the adrenaline slow to a normal pace and then communicate without accusing. Don't got to bed angry - it only festers overnight and it makes everything worse.
2006-10-12 23:27:06 · answer #3 · answered by Stella Bing 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most psychologists believe that feelings are synonymous with emotions, and they are not. Feelings are what ones brain thinks one is experiencing, and such 'thinking" is fed to ones brain by ones MIND that is converting active emotional energies into thoughts fed to ones brain which are expressed as feelings.... along with Delusional Thinking that projects upon others responsibility for "causing" ones feelings. This dishonest interchange is encouraged by psychologists of course because they have no idea what they are talking about.
What is missing in relationship interchanges is the owning of ones emotions... essentially because mental health has taught people to deny and ignore two-thirds of who and what they are. The Esoteric realms of MIND and Spirituality.
Honest expression of what one is actually experiencing at an emotional level within oneself is quite cathartic for both the experiencer and those around him/her. But such honesty is rare.
Peace
2006-10-13 00:09:27 · answer #4 · answered by docjp 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know if its age or just being with the same person so long, but I used to want to talk about everything...but now "less is more" when I look back at some of the things we HAD to "talk" about, it seem soooo "high school".
2006-10-12 23:37:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i agree. nothing good is kept inside, even if it is to protect the person. by fighting you sometimes come to something like "oh, well i didn't know you felt that way" and then you understand each other more. by not avoid talking, you're also not fully opened to the person and that's not such a good thing.
2006-10-12 23:27:57 · answer #6 · answered by Cathy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should know very well the person you are with.That being said they are wrong, Don't go to subjects that will hurt.
2006-10-12 23:45:50 · answer #7 · answered by gwhiz1052 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋