I walked into class and i was late and this guy said something about me. and this one girl i don't like laughed. and these people were looking at me. and i asked my friend if they were joking me and she said no. imaybe im paranoid but i don't know what to do. This guy keeps staring at me. I don't want this to be an on going thing. Help me! is this a big deal or not?!!!!
2006-10-12 13:44:04 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
In my expierience, I have learned that carrying yourself with confidence does a great deal. As to dealing with people laughing and looking at you when you are in an embarrasing moment, that is part of life, and doesn't mean anything is wrong with you. How you choose to deal with it may be. You were late, and that is what happens when you come in a classroom late sometimes. One way to avoid this is to make sure you are on time to classes. Prevent the situation from happening again.
As to the gentleman staring, is he staring at you? He may be staring at someone else. How to find out: ask him. Be confident, but dont be harsh. ask him directly if he is staring at you, and ask him politely to stop. If this does not seem to work, avoid situations where you are around this person. If he follows you, get help from a teacher, administrator, campus security, etc.
2006-10-12 13:50:34 · answer #1 · answered by Jimmy R 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ugh...school...
I think no matter what age you are the memories of immature mean ways we treated each other is haunting.
I canonly suggest that you try to forget about and do your own thing. You have a friend in the class. Maybe you could walk into class together ON TIME for the next few days. And be into your own conversation. If you forget about I think they will too.
If they persist in being jerks, you could either try to diffuse by just laughing it off with them.. If they are jerks then the more they know they are getting to you the more fun it is for them.
Good Luck
2006-10-12 13:51:18 · answer #2 · answered by markatger 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have heard that people pick on others because they are afraid of that person in some way. Either they are jealous of something, or they are so conceited and believe that they are so much better, that they have to set up a barrier between themselves and the person. I found in high school the second of these. I was over weight as a teen and everyone that picked on me seemed to be the "un popular" kids. They were, in someway, not in the "in" crowd and (I believe) they picked on me because it made themselves think they were "at least" better than I was.
So, when people say things about you and you feel made fun of, or left out, just know that these bullies have a self esteem problem. They are trying to prove to themselves that they are "at least" better than someone. When in reality they are shallow, conceited, selfish, paranoids who definitely prove to you that you ARE better than them.
2006-10-12 13:58:55 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
When we feel that someone is making fun of us it can cause a defense mechanism to trigger. You might immediately put up a guard to protect yourself and your reputation. However, this guarding behavior can cause the same response in others, creating a chain-reaction that may actually cause the situation that never existed in the first place.
I would ask myself... "Am I confident in who I am?" -YES!
"Do I need the approval of these jerks to find my value?" -NO!
"Are these guys just punks anyway?" -Probably
"Could they be laughing about something else and I'm blowing this out of proportion?" -Possible...
"What's going to cause the problem to worsen... over-reacting in a defensive nature, or making them feel like idiots by ignoring and hanging out with the people I know who are my friends?" -Friends rule, idiots drool
That's my 2¢ worth... Don't let it get to you... Be better than them and give them the benefit of the doubt... It might not be their fault, maybe they were dropped as babies or their mommy never hugged them. LOL
Good luck!
2006-10-12 13:55:57 · answer #4 · answered by JT 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
They found something that gets to you. It will probably keep being a problem if you keep showing them it bothers you. I'm not saying it's easy but somehow you've got to find a way to ignore it....let it go....or laugh it off to minimize it. Refusing to respond to it will make it go away. Really. As soon as it happens again - if it does - find someone to talk to or something to do - to act distracted until ignoring it becomes easy.
They may have said something about you being late but you don't have to respond to it. Show them you're bigger than that. Don't be shallow. Be big.
Why is it important what they think?
2006-10-12 13:52:28 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
i've been through this and much more all my life. i've learned to brush it off and not make it important at all. the less attention you give someone like him, the more annoyed he will be. listen, you can't be paranoid like this for the rest of your life. here's my way of looking at it: i try to be nice to everybody i know, especially my coworkers. if they treat me the same, that's great. but if they treat me like crap (and some of them do), i just wish nothing but the best for them (in my head) and don't make it a big deal. if you're gonna worry about how someone looks at you or thinks of you, etc..., you're not going to be happy with yourself. make yourself happy and forget about anyone who bothers you. they don't deserve your time and you don't need to worry about them. good luck and keep your head high.
2006-10-12 13:56:19 · answer #6 · answered by eyeswideopen37880 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
just tell him "you're creeping me out with your staring" it's pretty sad sometimes having those octopus eyes oogling what they can't have, just pitty him or you could just find a good excuse to reject him outright & tell him he makes you feel uncomfortable.
it's likely that he'll apologise after learning a lesson that will benefit the next girl he wants to creep out with his staring so you'll have done a public service & your personal space will be yours again!
2006-10-12 14:03:01 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Common thing, I'm sorry to say. Now you know why there ar so many movies that deal with "who was mean to me in HS".
Won't stop until you learn to act like it doesn't bother you.
2006-10-12 13:46:41 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The girl was jealous of your "exotic beauty" and the guy was playing along on her part. Don't let it bother you, or her job will have been a success.
2006-10-12 13:54:25 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would just simply ask him. What is so funny and see how he replies. You never know until you ask. If they know you will be straighforward and ask then they will back off if they are making jokes and stuff about you.
2006-10-12 13:48:00 · answer #10 · answered by mosierjuly 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋