And don't get married doesn't count as advice! What advice do you think would help the couple?
2006-10-12 11:00:22 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
all marriages are give a little take a little.. be willing to sacrifice for each other.. remember that trust and communication are very important.. remember that now u're about to learn what love and commitment is all about.. don't let divorce be an option and u'll always be looking for an answer to the problem rather than trying to get out of the marriage.. remember it is healthy for couples to disagree and have problems it's normal.. just get through them.. don't bottle up u're feelings.. find the proper time and place to express after u're emotions are out of it... remember a 3 fold cord is not quickly broken.. u, spouse, and God!... hope this helps
2006-10-12 11:06:54 · answer #1 · answered by program ideas 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Since you've not stated a specific problem, I'm assuming you want "overall" advice.
Be HONEST! And do it BEFORE your vows. All the love in the world will not lead to a healthy, happy marriage if you can't be honest with each other. Talk about EVERYTHING, even the unromantic stuff early, and be completely open. If you don't want any kids ever, and he does, don't expect it just to go away. You don't want any nasty surprises years down the road because you never truly discussed family or finance or whatever.
As I keep saying, marriage is not the magic bullet that fixes a relationship. Sure, the wedding is great, but reality will set in. If there was a problem before the "I Do's" it will still be there after.
Also remember that marriages take WORK and COMPROMISE. Again, love is not all you need. Expect arguments. They will happen and it's healthy, as long as you are honest and communicate with each other. Just because things get hard, it doesn't mean it's time to jump ship. I recommend people try their hardest to work things out before they give up.
Was that the sort of answer you were looking for? I know it's not all sweet and romantic, but it's the truth. People mystify marriage so much and boil it down to a just the wedding I think we really lose the point. Marriage is about building a life with another person...there's no way that's going to be easy. (but is so worth it! :-))
2006-10-12 11:12:47 · answer #2 · answered by Sativa 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Make sure that you completely understand the other's view on the important things.
Such as:
Are we going to have kids?
How many?
Will we both keep working after the babies start coming?
Who pays the bills? It can get complicated if both try to do it.
Joint accounts?
Boy and girl night outs?
Discipline of children?
Public or Private schools?
Who drives when both of you are in the car?
I know some of these seem little and things that you have plenty of time to talk about. However, knowing what I know now . . . . . find out now before you get married. You don't want to get years down the road, find out that you don't mesh on some of these things and it's a deal breaker.
It's best to know everything up front.
By the way, when it comes to kids and jobs, don't bank on the other person changing their minds. It doesn't happen that often and you'll end up either unhappy or divorced.
Good luck.
Tabberlynn
2006-10-12 11:13:05 · answer #3 · answered by tabberlynn 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
gig Id say get to know what is in each of you
what you like
what you hate
what gets you angry
and what gets you excited.
Marriage is a partnership a you both need to make an effort to keep the love growing and strong
so don't hold a grudge with the person you live with put the problems out there and when they are resolved don't file them throw them out .
The most important thing
is to be best friends some folks treat their friends with more respect and compassion than their spouses love cant bloom if there is no friendship.
2006-10-12 11:55:33 · answer #4 · answered by slick 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been given married as quickly as I became 20 and he became 23, it became like this we met at artwork he became in school i became in school then each and every thing got here approximately so quickly that the subsequent undertaking i understand i became married, pregnant, and out of my pastime and school. So, i'm no longer announcing that's an identical undertaking. don't get me incorrect we like one yet another and maximum of all our daughter yet we won't help to think of that if possibly shall we've waited somewhat greater then shall we actually see one yet another as friends and in comparison to three style of ordinary undertaking. So my advice to you is why no longer attempt residing at the same time for it sluggish and be conscious detect your courting and then make a determination oh and don't have a toddler appropriate away!
2016-10-02 05:57:35 · answer #5 · answered by schnetter 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stay open to each other. Talk about everything. Be honest. Be considerate of each other, when you are together and even when you are apart. Compromise whenever there is a disagreement. Be respectful of each other at all times. Don't involve others in your relationship. Don't allow pride to cause dissension between the two of you. Communicate your needs to each other, and try your hardest to see to them. Don't take each other for granted EVER. Take all the effort you put forth to get each others attention, and KEEP it up throughout the marriage.
Do these things......and you will last forever. =)
2006-10-12 11:19:53 · answer #6 · answered by lilac b 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To except the little things that bother you about the other person like not picking up their clothes and other things. Little things in life are not worth fighting over. Be patient and understanding. Marriage changes things. It might be really good in the beginning with lots of bliss but it will change not necessarily for the bad. Just except the changes in marriage.
2006-10-12 11:52:12 · answer #7 · answered by luvlisteningtomusic 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Accept each others strengths and be there in each others time of weakness. Don't try to change someones quirks unless they want to change. If they want to change, be supportive without being demanding or condescending.
Have a good circle of friends. Remember to take time out for yourself, and give her the space she needs to be her own individual self apart from you.
Tell the groom if she says that something is important to her more than once, remember it and do it. Don't placate her with "I know, I know!" She's trying to tell you what she needs to feel loved.
Read "The Love Languages" - people give and receive love in different ways, find out each others.
Enjoy each others company!
2006-10-12 11:15:12 · answer #8 · answered by WhyNotMe 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Talk about finances!!!!
Like...really talk about them! Get it all out in the open....
What's your credit...what bills do you have...student loans...any bankrupcies, who will balance the check book...what are financial goals...etc. Stuff like that.
I just got married 7 months ago...now that the honeymoon is pretty much over I have had some unpleasant surprises about my hubby's finances.
We never talked about things like that before we got married, and now that we have unified our finances...I just discovered what a mess his credit and finances were in. This is really going to impact our buying a house, getting a car loan...to many things to just list them here.
I know it doesn't sound really romantic...but it will save you some fights and stress in the future.
Congratulations on your incoming marriage!
2006-10-12 11:06:27 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Never go to bed mad at one another. I just got married last month, and this is the best advice I got. It is very true!!!
2006-10-12 11:10:54 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋