Why do so many women love men that treat them so badly?

Question

why don't women love the men that treat their woman with love and respect?
I see it all the time. I do not understand it.

Answer 1

Good question.......

Answer 2

I think when you love someone, no matter what they do, it's hard to stop loving them. My guy isn't physically violent and doesn't treat me badly in that respect but he emotionally hurts me quite a lot...only recently when I threatened to leave him (though I don't think I ever could) did he decide to do something about it by saying he'd go and see someone about his problem. This makes me think that he loves me because he's willing to do something to correct the way he treats me, even though it's taken a long time coming.
I think men can push women to see how far they can take things before the woman leaves, and it gives the men a sense of power i think, the men that do this are often very protective of their women at all other times which women like and therefore love their men!

Answer 3

In my own case, I know that when I first met my man... He said amazing things that made me believe he was one of the best nice guys out there... and when he did something disrespectful and I let him know how I felt, he came back with great words and pretending that he hadn't understood that I would feel that way about what he had done or he hadn't really thought about it. He has always nicely said that I should let him know when he does something that I don't like so he will not do it again (only even when I do this.. maybe it changes for a day.. but goes back to the same after that.)
He said so many things in the beginning that I believed.. tried to make it look like he was perfect for me (there's a whole manipulative scenario and reason for why he did this, but I won't get into that here).. anyway, despite the fact that we never actually did any of the things I really like to do together or that he actually likes different music and things than he said he did, etc. etc. I put so much into loving and caring for him, that when the truth started to come out, it was hard to believe and realize.. I kept giving him excuses. I've recently realized that I am still in love with the man that I thought he was.. Only problem is, he isn't actually that man - he just looks like him! Same face, hair, body, clothes, etc.
I've also found that many women like to be helpers and caretakers, so when they find a not - so - nice man, they've found their "project".. (even if this is subconscious) thinking that they can be the helper and changer...
and sure they can.. but they should do it from outside the relationship as a friend/mentor... not as a girlfriend or wife, because in that situation, the man has the potential to manipulate or have too much control over the woman.
From things I have noticed, once you have been in a relationship for a while, no matter how unhealthy, you feel connected and comfortable with the person even if it isn't good.. and if you are feeling depressed, have low-self esteem, are scared or timid in your current relationship that is supposed to be your "safety net" from the rest of the world, the world can look like a very big, very scary place to venture out into. Maybe sometimes its like that syndrome people can get after they've been kidnapped or something.. where after a while, if they are having trouble understanding or reconciling the situation they are in, they will try to see it from the other persons point of view (which is a good and normal thing in good relationships) but can be very harmful in a situation where they are being treated poorly.. leading them to believe that they have done something to cause the bad treatment, so then they bow down further to the man who treats them badly and the cycle of bad treatment - lower self esteem, etc continues... and everytime the man treats them well... they get excited.. and then look to the man for him to tell her when she is "being good" and when she is "being bad"

Answer 4

unfortunately a lot of it has to do with how they have been treated in the past. people who have been treated badly once often go back to old habits by repeating the trend over and over again. some people who have been abused also experience this. they go for the same type of person who is going to hurt them because either they don't realize what they are doing or they think they don't deserve any better. once you are told or made to feel you are nothing, why go for a person you think is really great, because you think you could never have them and even if you did how would you keep them? it is really sad. i have seen it happen many times as well. it is so easier for the outside to say "leave them now!!" but they just won't and it doesn't make sense. it has a lot to do with fear. they think about what they would do without them and that no one else would want them. really sad.

Answer 5

Oh gawsh, this is one I know! I married twice to men who treated me with disrespect, I thought I would never learn! After my second divorce, I vowed never to get married again, and Only date once in a while. After spending a few weekends at the bars (singing) I was hit on by so many guys who had nothing going for them! Except drinking, divorce and no self respect. Until one day, the "nice guy" showed up. I wouldnt have usually even bothered, because I liked the bad boys. But this time I gave it a chance! I struggled with the fact that he was treating me so wonderful and didnt know how to deal with iut, but it has been three years now! Got maried in May, been happy since the beginning. I wouldnt trade my nice guy in for ANYONE! Its good to be treated with respect. I dont know what I was thinking before. HE IS OUT THERE. look where you would least expect it. Might be right in front of you!

Answer 6

Sometimes women are looking for that "father figure" who will tell them what to do and when to do it. A lot of women were once little girls who adored their fathers. They may be trying to replace that feeling with finding a guy who seems to remind them of their dad.

Other times women don't think they deserve to be treated better than that. They feel that they are not good enough and should be treated like that.

Answer 7

I see it constantly too. I'm a woman and I've never put up with that shite. If they treated me badly I had no problem showing them the door.

Answer 8

You are a very nice person.....BUT....you watch too much Maury. Maury is a TV show that has turned into Jerry Springer. You cannot base "real life" with what you see on there. The people that he "exploits" need help and therapy, not to be "exploited" on TV. Instead of "using" them to draw an audience he should use the money he spends on producing the show to get them the therapy and help they need to get their life together. Peace & Love :)

Answer 9

I just don't know I love someone who is just not treating me write. But I am in love with him. I don't know, I thinks this is what love is about.

Answer 10

like the old saying goes....."A lady loves an outlaw like a little boy loves a stray dog!"...go figure...

Answer 11

He convinces her that he will change (which he won't) and makes her feel as if he's the best guy she'll ever have.