My husband had a prior short relationship of kissing and making out and meeting this other woman who was married at the time as well and my and my hub both know her and her hub well. We are really good common friends of each other. Anyway how is it that if my hub and her talked about not seeing or doing anything again...this was over 7 months ago and that every time they run into each other at a party or with us at a restaurant, those two keep staring in each others eyes and my hub gazes in her eyes and he always does this. i find him observe her and her actions at times. why does he do this?
Also if he told her they can't do see or kiss or anything, but yet she writes him friendly/general emails which he ALWAYS replies back to every time, and he also knows the woman loves him. Don't you think my man does like her alot? Is it possible for him to kiss me, make love to me, do good things for me, but then on the side reply back to her emails, only tell me about some of them, and
2006-10-12 08:18:36 · 25 answers · asked by Saira D 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
keep their kiss and making out a big secret from me? I mean my hub and I have a little girl now who is 5 months, and his replies to her still go on. She always is the one to initiate emails, then he replies to her always. What would you make of my hub?
2006-10-12 08:19:40 · update #1
I believe you can love 2 people at the same time...it generally makes a mess of things, but yes, I think it is possible. I think it's probably best if you sever all ties with this other couple. They have an illicit history together, there is no reason for you to continue your friendship with them, and neither should he.
2006-10-12 08:21:54 · answer #1 · answered by melouofs 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Love is a strange thing. You can love someone with all your heart but it seems to me your husband is more infatuated with this other woman. The grass always looks greener on the other side until you have to live there. E-mails are just that. Letters. No physical means of connecting. Sounds more like she is trying to get to his heart. The looks can come from lust alone but once he starts to find common ground in his heart then you will lose him. You have a family started. Your child comes first. Talk to your husband and tell him how this makes you feel. Tell him that you need reassurance and that it makes you feel insecure. Does he know these things already? Sometimes men are blind to the flirtations of women and maybe he doesn't see the position she is putting the two of you in. Better yet if the emails are just friendly and general maybe you should send her a few. Tell her how beautiful your little girl is and what a wonderful time you and your husband had on your last night out. Let her know what the two of you have and the happiness you share together. Sure couldn't hurt but might help her see you aren't going anywhere.
2006-10-12 15:32:54 · answer #2 · answered by rose v 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He had and is still having an affair. If he wants to meet with his lover, they can do it anytime they want with out anyone but them knowing. So if you think they are not still seeing each other, there is something wrong with you. Something has to be wrong with you anyway, to know your husband and a (non-friend) of yours is making out and kissing each other and you don't think they aren't taking it all the way... well, they are. You really need to stop playing the if I don't see it then I don't know it's happening routine. He doesn't love anyone but himself. If he loved her, he would give up what he has with you, and go to her. If he really loved you, he would have total respect for you. He only proves that he is in love with himself. You really need to start loving yourself too.
2006-10-12 15:35:11 · answer #3 · answered by ricepat2000 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your man, like many men (or even women), want what they can't have (or more like, what they shouldn't have)! Your husband might be thinking that this woman is perfect for him, but he also realizes that he has responsibillities at home (your baby). If he left you for that woman and she left her husband, neither one would probably enjoy the relationship as much as they do now. It's a proven fact that people like to be bad! And when it's no longer bad, it's not as fun. At the end of the day you need to do whats right for you. If you want to continue putting up with this sh*t, then go for it. But you don't need it!! Be strong! Tell him to end it-end seeing her, end emailing her, end f*cking her. If he does end it, give him another try, but if not... leave him and find someone that truely loves you!!
2006-10-12 15:32:14 · answer #4 · answered by Jay 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Woman are you blind ! I think you know in your heart what is going on there , you need to cut all communications with this woman , and does her hub know what went on , ? , if you are okay with this situation , then you need to seek counseling , as soon as possible ! Your hubby is burning the candle at both ends and you might be the who gets burnt !
: ( LB
2006-10-12 15:36:16 · answer #5 · answered by Lois B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't say that a person, man or woman, can only love one person at a time, but there is a big difference between love and infatuation.
Replying to emails isn't a definite sign of love or infatuation, but if it bothers you, talk to him about it. Don't accuse him of anything, just calmly let him know your thoughts and ask him how he feels. Hopefully you can come to some sort of understanding.
2006-10-12 15:22:13 · answer #6 · answered by Dave C 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Will you let it go already? You sound psycho. I didn't know they allowed computers in an insane asylum. So, he loves that other woman; now what? You married this player, you made your choice, just go with it. Or leave. But I wish you would stop posting the same inane question over and over.
2006-10-12 15:26:02 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Obviously it's possible -- you're sitting here telling us that he's doing it!!! He isn't respecting you as his wife if he knows that what he is doing is bothering you, but he's still doing it anyways.
He could be cheating on you - or he could just be fantasizing about her, but not cheating. (Unless you consider that cheating too).
I would have a serious discussion with him about how much what he is doing hurts you, and if he doesn't stop, kick him to the curb! You deserve better than that, and he sounds like a real jerk to do this while you're watching, especially.
2006-10-12 15:22:28 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Sounds to me babe he still carrys a torch for this woman, sorry but you need to hear yourself. Do you really want to play second fiddle to another woman when you should be the only violin in his life???? Come on now, think this over, talk to him, if he continues this, kick his rump to the curb hun.
2006-10-12 15:22:58 · answer #9 · answered by LunaFaye 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he's in love with her. It's very possible that they are still having an affair. All communication must be cut off form her. Your marriage is not safe.
2006-10-12 15:22:23 · answer #10 · answered by tpurtygrl 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋