Well I just recently got married and I am loving every mintue. Now I know I can't change myself unless I want to, but I am a very emoitional person. Lately I have been really attached to my husband to the point were I will start crying just thinking about having to go to work and what not. I know I am not pregnant I have checked! I was wondering if you had this type of thing happen to you and how you went about adjusting this issue. I don't want to not be attached I just feel I am a little overly attached. Any recommendations are apperciated! Thanks!
2006-10-12 05:08:39 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I apperciate all the answers. I know I need to handle it better that is why I was asking for some ways to change. I do take care of him I clean up after him, I cook for him, I do whatever I can for him. We have been married for about 3 months and I have had him go into the hospital twice both times up to a week. This last time was just 4 to 5 days ago. I may just be a little emoitional about that and to say that I need to get over it is mean and rude! I am just concerned and I may be overly attached but not by much! So to those that were nice and gave answers that didn't sound like you had a stick up your but. Thank you! To those that do have a stick up the but re-evaluate your relationship and stop bagging on others just because they are more emoitional than most!
2006-10-12 10:51:53 · update #1
Yes absolutely - sometimes loving someone so much gives you a flood of emotion. The best thing to do is when you feel it coming on...leave the room and let it out. Or, give in once in a while. Also, I have found that when I am experiencing one of these swings...is to switch my focus. Go out with the girls, take a drive, go shopping - - go somewhere. The interesting thing that happens, is when you get home, your husband naturally is so eager to see you because you walk in the confident, assured woman that he married!
2006-10-12 06:51:19 · answer #1 · answered by SngrDncrDiva 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel the same way sometimes. I can't sleep if my husband's not in the bed too. I'll just be tossing and turning all night. But you have to work on this before it gets out of control. You need to keep the old you in check. What did you do before this guy? Hang out with friends? Whatever, do it. Spend time away too so you can have a life that doesn't revolve around being married.
2006-10-12 12:44:52 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are definitely over attached. When I got married, I was sooo happy! I chose not to work out in the afternoon so that I could come home quickly to my husband... But I did do things socially with my friends - without my husband, and I didn't cry when we were apart, I just missed him. We have been married for 4 years now, and I still want to be with him as much as possible, but we both have busy lives together and apart, so it has all equalized. Occasionally I find myself demanding too much of his time and I correct it. Just be careful. You don't want to smother him or lose touch with your friends....
2006-10-12 12:24:34 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, Congratulations! Second, you need to get out with your girlfriends! You're becoming too clingy!!(I wouldn't call it "attached") You need your space, and as much as your new husband does! Just like you have your friends, he has his and then the two of you have mutual friends together - you need to have a girls night out! Shopping, Dinner, cocktails, girlie movies, ya know lots of girl things that men don't particularly care to do.
You will overwhelm you new husband, and hell feel like you're insecure about yourself, or your relationship. You'll end up pushing him away! You both need your space, Honey, go to work - go shopping, do what you need in order to have a POSITIVE future together! If he see that you don't want to work, he'll feel as thought he doing all the contributing towards the relationship and the future!
Good Luck!
2006-10-12 12:41:01 · answer #4 · answered by sunbunny06 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There's nothing wrong with you at all. You have found your true soulmate, and you want to spend your time with him. I think women go through emotional bursts every now & then, and our emotions seem larger than life.
I went through something similar this Summer. I fell in love with my husband all over again, and I wanted to be with him all the time. He has enjoyed the newfound relationship too. As long as you and your husband are enjoying your new life together, then good for you. I congratulate you on keeping the honeymoon feelings going!!
(If you find yourself getting too emotional in front of him, try to tone it down a little. This part of me scared the heck out of my hubby, and we had a nice long talk about it)
Best Wishes Honey.
2006-10-12 12:21:36 · answer #5 · answered by Cynthia 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What did you like to do before you got married? Rediscover old friends and hobbies. Force yourself to do your own thing if that is what it takes. Call a friend and tell her you need her to come and pick you up and make you go to a movie-- your treat.
I love my husband and we do spend a lot of time together, but I also do my own thing every day. Even if it is just going to the gym for an hour, it helps. He will appreciate the time on his own and so will you. Hang in there!
2006-10-12 12:18:34 · answer #6 · answered by hannahthemovie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can totally relate to what you're saying - and I was the same when we got married (and still am to be honest!!) but after a while guys do start to feel smothered AND they can start to take you for granted because they are never having to search for your company coz ure always there. Force yourself to be independant at least some of the time as this is likely to enhance your marriage in the long run
2006-10-12 12:16:25 · answer #7 · answered by misscynic 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The real tough questions are always asked by ladies. Hook up with co-workres to ease the pain of not seeing him for a short time. When you start to have some of your own interests, your emotional dependancy will slowly wain. Get a hobby. Make sure that the hobby is not something to do together. Then, when you come home, you can have something to share with him. Good luck
2006-10-12 12:19:33 · answer #8 · answered by Jayme C 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was very attached to my husband when we first got married. I hated it when he left me to go out with friends, I was kind of jealous of his friends. I was 19, that might have had something to do with it, I don't know. I don't think it is weird or anything, I have found out that men need space, and I am older now and I love my space. You will get over it. Always make sure you have some friends, sister, or mom to talk to. I actually got very close to my mother in law then. Good luck
2006-10-12 12:16:49 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think your reaction is so strange at all. I would not be too concerned about it, unless you feel it is affecting your relationship negatively. I would suggest sharing this with your husband - why not be honest with him? If it is really very upsetting to you, I suggest you speak to a counsellor. Many people think marriage is a joke, but you are taking it seriously. Good for you! Hope you have many wonderful years together!
2006-10-12 12:18:50 · answer #10 · answered by shakespear 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋