i ve tried all de tricks i know still he is not satisfied, sometime those stupid things call him on phone, i even call the girls on phone to see if they will stay off him that he is happily married still he dosen"t want to change, my marriage was just a year oct 8 and i love my husband most times he says business but within me i know its not true, please i need help and i dont want bad advice.
2006-10-12 02:52:34 · 52 answers · asked by africa queen 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Get some self respect and ship out!
Ditch the cheating prick - if he loved you he would NOT be playing around.
2006-10-12 02:55:33 · answer #1 · answered by lisaandmax 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Three years ago my husband too had an affair after being married for 33 years. I was heart broken and packed his bags and through him out. When confronted he tried to blame me but I wouldn't have it. I also spoke to and visited to woman he was having an affair with when I confronted her I got him on the phone to which he told her it was only for sex even though he did like her as a friend. He admitted he overstepped the mark. When he realised he was about to lose his family including his grandchildren there was no choice.
Sometimes we do have a part to play and I believe that part is that we can bury our heads in the sand and pretend its not really happening, however we need to confront it. If he is not happy no amount of tricks in the bedroom will make him stay. He has to want to be with you, and don't accept anything less. If he doesn't and I know it can be painful let him go.You deserve better. Above all don't lose your self respect by contacting these women he is seeing as it gives them the power over you.
Good luck
2006-10-12 03:12:10 · answer #2 · answered by Margaret S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
don't listen to wthing5. you have a right to make a big deal of it. Especially if you and your husband are still sexually active. Does he wear protection with these girls. Who knows what he's bringing into your bed after being with them. You deserve better! Marriage means a commitment to one person only. What is he telling you? Why are you letting him get away with treating you with such disrespect? Your instincts are usually right, so tune in and decide how you want to be treated. There is no easy answer here, tossing him would be great, but obviously you've made a life with him. You can't decide how he's going to act, but you sure can decide what your willing to put up with and how you want to be treated by your husband. No matter, don't wait another minute, deal with the issue, since it's not worth living with it clouding over you all the time.
2006-10-12 03:08:10 · answer #3 · answered by pippy4tao 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It won't do any good telling you to just leave him, especially since you've only been married for a year. I do however think you must do something to knock some sense into him. If you really want to stay with him, then you'll have to fight real hard and show him what he has in you. If you could find out what he see in the other girls, then you can do something that's so much better! Show him something that would want to make him stay home with you all day! Good luck!
2006-10-12 03:23:11 · answer #4 · answered by Charmaine V 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to grow up and accept that this guy is messing you around. It is obvious what is going on and you are making it worse by letting him get away with it. How do you recon he would react if the shoe was on the other foot and you were staying out all night and getting phone calls off of other guys? Do you think he would be sitting around asking us lot on here what to do or would he be taking steps to make sure it didn't happen? I know what i'd do. Don't think i'm having a go at you cos i'm not but you really do need to wake up and smell the coffee!!!
2006-10-12 06:03:01 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry to hear this - i am sure you have tried all the tricks, and do not think that you can improve things by trying some of the other sexual behaviours mentioned below. He just gets off on variety. There are many men like this. It is very important that you are not a doormat - have you lived with him for a long time before the marriage? Do you know him very well? I really think you have to be firm with him and say "change or it is over" - but you have to be prepared to go through with it. Do not be degraded by this man.
2006-10-12 09:38:49 · answer #6 · answered by Miss Behavin 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he does not want to change and he is sleeping around, all he is going to do is bring you home a disease that medicine can not cure. You need to lay down the law, either he stays home and is a faithful husband or you are gone, for good. If you know he is cheating, all that means is that he does not care what you think, how you feel, what his vows were or your happiness.
2006-10-12 03:11:44 · answer #7 · answered by Suthern R 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You need to pick a time when he's relaxed and talk to him. Have a heart to heart. Tell him you love him but you have self-respect, too, and you will not stay in a marriage if he continues to cheat. Tell him you aren't stupid and that you are on to him. If he were happy and a nice guy, he wouldn't want to hurt you by cheating. But he is obviously not a nice guy and he doesn't care if he hurts you right now. Suggest to him that you'd like him to attend marital counseling with you. Tell him that if the marriage is important to him he will go with you. If he refuses to go, you have your answer....he doesn't care. Then, you get to decide if you love him enough to be his door-mat forever, and catch whatever STD he manages to get while cheating. If you have any self-respect in tact, you will give him a chance, but leave him if he doesn't agree to work on the marriage with you. You deserve better.
2006-10-12 03:05:00 · answer #8 · answered by Wiser1 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you really need to think hard about if you want this for the rest of your life or if you want someone that wont cheat on you? Personally i would not stand for it and soon enough it's going to hurt you and make you feel bad about yourself and no man should be able to do that! I think you need to talk to a close friend! It's not fair on you, you deserve better!
2006-10-15 23:30:33 · answer #9 · answered by mummytray 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well only a year into your marriage he is already cheating, I think you need to leave. He obviously has been cheating from before you two married. It's not fair to you and I am sure you can do much better.
2006-10-12 03:04:33 · answer #10 · answered by Lady Dee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you amaze me you use the word "happy" when you talk about your realtionship, you need to get some respect for yourself, you know this is happing yet you are putting up with it, you can not do this you cant live the rest of your life like this! i know i sound horrible but seriously you need to ask yourself if you can trust him anymore? you may love him but he has done something that he or you can never change, he has not only cheated on you but he has broke your heart, you deserve better, there are plenty of fish in the sea that will not do this to you, but if you decided to stay with him you need him to build the trust back with you, if it was me i would have left a long time ago, no man even if you love him is worth staying with after cheating a lepoard will never change it spots remeber that!
2006-10-16 01:02:20 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋