A married couple is driving down the freeway doing 80 km/h. The husband is behind the wheel. His wife looks over at him and says, Honey, I know we've been married for 15 years, but I want a divorce. The husband says nothing but slowly increases speed to 90 km/h. She says, I don't want you to try talk me out of it, because while you've been off fishing so much, I've been having an affair with your best friend and he's a better lover than you. Again the husband stay's quiet and just speeds up as his anger increases. She says, I want the house. Again the husband speeds up and now is doing 120 km/h. She says, I want the car, the checking account and all the credit cards too. The husband slowly starts to veer towards the bridge overpass piling, as she says, Is there anything you want?. The husband says, No I've got everything I need. She asks, What's that. The husband replies just before they hit the wall at 160km/h, I've got the airbag!!
2006-10-11 19:26:03 · 17 answers · asked by Barney B 3 in Travel ➔ Africa & Middle East ➔ South Africa
Ha! Great one Barney!
As usual, here's a few more jokes:
A guy enters bar carrying an alligator. Says to the patrons, "Here’s a deal. I'll open this alligator's mouth and place my genitals inside. The gator will close his mouth for one minute, then open it, and I'll remove my unit unscathed. If it works, everyone buys me drinks." The crowd agrees. The guy drops his pants and puts his privates in the gator's mouth. Gator closes mouth. After a minute, the guy grabs a beer bottle and bangs the gator on the top of its head. The gator opens wide, and he removes his genitals unscathed. Everyone buys him drinks. Then he says: "I'll pay anyone $100 who's willing to give it a try." After a while, a hand goes up in the back of the bar. It's a woman. "I'll give it a try," she says, "but you have to promise not to hit me on the head with the beer bottle."
A guy meets a hooker in a bar. She says, "This is your lucky night. I’ve got a special game for you. I’ll do absolutely anything you want for $300, as long as you can say it in three words." The guy replies, "Hey, why not?" He pull his wallet out of his pocket, and one at a time lays three hundred-dollar bills on the bar, and says, slowly: "Paint…my…house."
At a White House party, a woman approached Calvin Coolidge, famed for his silence, and said "Mr. President, I made a bet I can get more than two words out of you." He replied: "You lose."
2006-10-11 20:25:42 · answer #1 · answered by orion 3 · 3⤊ 2⤋
A humorous one and that i provide you a megastar. that's a humorous(!!) ghosts chat. 2 ghosts met and the two chat approximately how they died. 1st ghost : How u died? 2d ghost : I died of chilly. 1st ghost : How does it experience once you're dying in chilly? 2d ghost : definitely, i became by probability locked in the refrigerator. initially, i became shivering, then my finished physique began to freeze, later I felt the finished international became dark and that i died suffocating. 1st ghost : Wow what a terrible thank you to die.... 2d ghost : How approximately you? How u die? 1st ghost : I died from heart attack. 2d ghost : I see, why did u have a heart attack? 1st ghost : definitely, i found out that my spouse is having an affair with yet another guy. sooner or later, when I got here back from paintings, observed a pair of guy shoes exterior my homestead. Then, i found out that the guy became in my homestead with my spouse. when I rushed into the mattress room, my spouse became on my own. i ought to discover the place that bastard is hiding. So I searched the bathroom, I ran downstairs, appeared in the storeroom, however the bastard became not there. So, I ran upstairs and searched the dresser, yet i stumbled on not something. by way of fact of all that working,I have been given a heart attack and died. 2d ghost : Why you in no way seek for the bastard in the refrigerator? The bastard became hiding there. We the two could be alive now!!
2016-10-16 02:38:31 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I thought this was great, so did the whole of my office!
2006-10-12 03:24:09 · answer #3 · answered by chrissieyp 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am really impressed that you have such a wonderful stream of "cheer me uppers" to start each day with.
2006-10-11 21:31:35 · answer #4 · answered by london.oval 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Quite humourous.
2006-10-11 19:44:05 · answer #5 · answered by Phlodgeybodge 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
very good i will show this to my brother because his wife is taking him for all his money at the moment so maybe he could try it lol
2006-10-11 19:47:56 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
Yes I had a laugh. Nice joke but not question
2006-10-11 19:41:59 · answer #7 · answered by wparkar 2 · 2⤊ 3⤋
Great joke, I had a good laugh. Thank you.
2006-10-11 19:37:34 · answer #8 · answered by flamingo 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Great!
2006-10-11 19:27:28 · answer #9 · answered by riettebotha2 4 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Lol.. nice one
2006-10-11 19:36:54 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋