I am married. I love my husband but we have had a lot of arguments and so forth. He did something about 5 months ago, that I still have not forgiven him for. I don't want anyone else but him though. However, when he hurt me--trust issue (not cheating), I said to myself that I had had enough and that I did not care anymore what he thought. I started yahoo answers about a month later and he encouraged me to make some new friends that were in different countries. Ok, so I made a friend and we talked a lot since my husband I were not on good terms. We were only friends, but this was a guy. My husband would get mad and tell me that I could not talk to him anymore and then he would tell me I could. He even got physically violent with me over this. So I ended up saying goodbye to this friend. I have few friends that I trust and I really enjoyed talking to this person. My husband is happy and all that fighting/physical stuff ended when I ended this. But I still miss my friend!!
2006-10-11 19:01:50 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
I don't want to go behind my husband's back and do anything upsetting, but I just miss my friend and I see him online and it is so hard not to say hi. It makes me so sad.
2006-10-11 19:02:36 · update #1
well, this is hard but easy. If you realy love your husband and want it to work, do NOT get back in touch with this person. If he were your friend BEFORE you met your husband it would be different, no man has the right to choose your friends for you, unless you want him to. And if he has valid reason to, cut the ties with the friend. BUT, if you have genuine feelings for the "friend", definitly cut it out or leave your husband, cuz it's just like cheating, i think. Feelings for a man change it from friendship to somehing more, even if you don't have sex...if you love your husband, make it work with him
2006-10-11 19:11:44 · answer #1 · answered by kim 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can't see why the physical abuse over a cyber friend, unless you are quoting him to your husband and he feels that you are getting to close to him, never let your friends into your private life to the point that your spouse feel intimidated. To say Hi to your friend on line should not be a problem just keep it simple. Don't lose yourself in your husband become a stronger individual within yourself. Let him know your love for him doesn't interfere with your other friendships. As an adult, you are entitled to pick your own friends as long as you keep them in prospective
2006-10-12 02:20:59 · answer #2 · answered by tricia5661 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ohhhhh, I know that feeling too............................
Your man is overbearing, jealous, insecure and sounds like he's short on trust here!!!!!!!
!st of all, I see the signs of Domestic Violence, and watch out, because if his temper flies about you being friends a guy, it shows what else would he "flip" over???
It's a BAD start when a man gets physically violent!
Don't think it won't happen again! Keep your eyes open and if you EVER find this starting up again with his anger, I'd get out and don't look back!!!!!!
I learned!
2006-10-12 02:13:34 · answer #3 · answered by julesrules 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In essence, you did to your husband what he did not do to you. You cheated.
You gave your emotions and intellectual connection to a man who is not your husband. That's cheating. No wonder he was angry. Do not contact your friend.
I'm curious what it is that you're holding over your husband's head and refusing to forgive him for. Whatever it is, that's making it easier for you to grow more distant. If he's a good man, and you want to stay married, you had better let go of whatever you're clinging to and focus on your marriage.
HOWEVER... if what you're not forgiving him for is violence... get out now.
2006-10-12 02:06:40 · answer #4 · answered by SLWrites 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
one no offense but your not the brightest are you. no man should ask you to give up a friend. two he got physicl with you. that is a big red flasher right there to leave him. it doesn't sound to me like you are too happy, and if you talking to a guy can make him get physical, then he could do it over anything.
2006-10-12 02:06:02 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You and your husband sound like a couple of nut cases that need to get divorced. Somehow, you seem like the type of girl that loves to be abused and always will.
2006-10-12 02:10:37 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like he is insecure. Let him know that it will take time to forgive what he did and let him know that you miss talking to your friend. You could let him know about some things that you talked about. Let him talk to him and maybe they can become friends too.
2006-10-12 02:08:23 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋