my teen daughter?

Question

she gets good grades....she is 16....she is on the pill, and her and her boyfriend are monogamous....he spends the nite occasionally.... he is 17....i feel its ok....how do other parents feel about this.....does anyone have this same situation? do not respond if you dont....actually, email me if you want, ONLY if you are in the same [e-mail]

Answer 1

so when she ends up with a child you will support it and not the rest of us right ? be her mother NOT her friend

Answer 2

Dont listen to what these people are telling you, they are all being rude. I think its the right thing to do. Youd rather her be at home with her boyfriend than some where out sneaking around and getting drunk wouldnt you? At least you know where she is, that she is safe and you are a good parent by making her go on the pill. Its really stupid how all these people are saying that shes gonna wind up pregnent really early because you are showing her you trust her and making her take the pill. Its the right thing to do as long as you dont leave them home alone for too long.

Answer 3

Well, I'm not a parent, but my mother allowed me to have my boyfriends spend the night with me when I lived with her, and I didn't wind up pregnant or a "whore" like all of these people on here with their "holier than thou" attitude have told you she will.

I believe that there is nothing wrong with it as long as it is occasional. I know my mother did it because she knew I was already having sex (*gasp* I didn't wait until I was married...and I don't care what other people think about it) and wanted me to be safe. It's better to have her at home with you than sneaking around to do it and getting into a lot more trouble.

Answer 4

You obviously aren't okay with the idea or you wouldn't be asking this question.

I can't tell you what to do, but I can tell you that I have an 18yr old daughter, a 14yr old son and a 13 yr old daughter, and none of them will have a boyfriend sleep over IN THE SAME BED until they are living together, are married or I'm not home... I'm not comfortable with the idea of sex in my home with my kids.

Ask yourself this question: would you have done it to your parents? It doesn't have anything to do with the times and the fact that it's 2006... I feel it has more to do with respect. It's like smoking or drinking... you know they're gonna do it. As a parent however, I don't think my job is to make it easier for them. My job is to give them roots and wings.... so they can stand on their own two feet and yet fly on their own one day...

How would you feel if your daughter went to a motel with this guy? Because basically, you're a free hotel for them.....

Answer 5

Usually, how we treat our kids reflects how our parents treated us, with amendments made for when we thought they were unfair.

I had sons, not sure how well I would have coped with daughters and sexuality. Sons were strange enough.

My policy was mostly, no sleep overs, no overt carnal behavior in public areas, and no grandbabies. And absolutely no intoxicated females on premisis.

We all set our own rules. It aint my job to judge yours or anyone elses.

Nor is it anyone's job here.

It is a mistake to ask for help then quallify who can answer, it limits your data. Stupid if you have a question.

Good luck getting the answer you seek.

Answer 6

Girl don't be on here asking these non mothers for their advice half of these women are still trying to get pregnant if u trust your daughter then don't ask these people for their advice that makes u look stupid because all they doing is hoeing u so close this question before your daughter see this and think that u don't trust her.

Answer 7

UMMM... I HAVE A 16 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER, AND SHE IS VERY RESPONCIBLE, AND MATURE FOR HER AGE. SHE HAS NOT HAD A BOYFRIEND YET, AND I CAN HONESTLY SAY THAT IF SHE DID, I WOULDN'T LET HIM SPEND THE NIGHT, JUST TO SPEND THE NIGHT. IF THERE WAS AN ISSUE AT HIS HOUSE OR IF WE WERE GOING ON A TRIP EARLY THE NEXT MORNING AND HE WERE TO COME ALONG, THEM MAYBE YES. BUT NOT JUST SPEND THE NIGHT.... I READ SOME OF YOUR REPLYS AND I DON'T THINK YOU ARE A HORRIBLE PARENT, BUT IF YOU NEEDED SOMEONES THOUGHTS ON THIS, YOU MUST HAVE FELT IT WASN'T OK....

Answer 8

If you are OK with it no problem, forget what others think. You realize your daughter is a young woman and chose to be sexually active and you've accepted the fact, I give you ALOT of credit. When my 17yr old daughter and her boyfriend came to visit (Divorced from her mother.) myself and her stepmom allowed them to have their own room, and they would go camping in occassion. Young adults are human and thus humans are sexual beings if they choose to be sexually active it is their choice to make. These days I'd rather accept the fact and insure they are safe, there have been instances of criminals comming upon young couples making love and these encounters end in tragedy. Parnets do not get to choose if a teen is sexually active or not, it is there own personal choice.

Answer 9

my mom treated me the same way........and there is no way in hell my daughter will be allowed to. I am not preaching, I just know how it affected me and that it wasn't right. I shacked up with my daughters dad before we were married, but I won't do it ever again...even though her dad is.....I am not undermining the sanctity of marriage with either shacking up or condoning behavior I don't approve of. My flesh is weak, my childrens is much stronger....I think that is because it was ok with my mom....too late for me to change, but I don't have to raise my kids with them thinking those things are ok.

Answer 10

What kind of mother are you? What message will your posting give to the global society with diverse culture.In India and Pakistan many parents would have killed their daughter for this. By no ethical standards your conduct is right.

Answer 11

I just wouldn't let them sleep in the same room together, but that's just me.