I've been attracting bad boys since I was 6 years old, and they have always fascinated me in turn. But when the crunch comes, I always get frightened, back off, and end up choosing sweet boys. I'm not saying all my ex-boyfriends have been saints (far from it!), but they've generally been caring and gentle, and treated me really well.
I think I'm too old now at 26 to find out for myself, so for those women who have really done the whole bad boy thing, what exactly is it like to date a bad boy? What have I missed out on by being a wimp and choosing the nice guy every time?
2006-10-11 14:25:36 · 20 answers · asked by Girl Machine 7 in Social Science ➔ Gender Studies
Okay, I can see some of you saying the bad boys are "sexy". Without getting too explicit, can you explain what was so hot about them in bed?
And I'm not complaining about sweet boys either - I have had a remarkably trouble-free love life, and have never had a negative sexual experience. I've been more than happy in the bedroom.
Just wondering about the road less travelled, so to speak.
2006-10-11 14:47:35 · update #1
Oh yeah, and I only say 26 is too old, because maybe I am getting on a bit for dating "boys". I mean, a 30 year "bad boy" is just friggin' tragic. My bf is 22, and I think he might be my last one, anyway.
2006-10-11 16:01:15 · update #2
Hah, you've missed out on a bf that treats you like garbage and makes you do things you dont want to.
Good job on picking out the good guys
2006-10-11 14:33:40 · answer #1 · answered by kitkat_rulez 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well, bad boys generally have a suitcase of problems for you to solve, if you are not adverse to rolling up your sleeves and doing all the work and being a slave. Some bad boys, on the other hand, have extremely redeemable qualities, like leadership and plain ornery stubborness that can surprise you.
If you believe him to be so, then so he is. He may not be able to manage money or be wise in raising the kids, but if he has a good heart deep down there and you can find it, and well, an image that comes to mind is of a wild garden that you must bring out the strongest features. Find his good points and bring them out. Look at his bad points (they are blatant) and acknowledge them for what they are. It's like a wild horse that only comes to you and then amazes everyone that this thing isn't going to kill you. It's like you have...MAGICAL POWERS!
well, that's the delusion. Then again, he may be a violent murdering SOB and you end up spending 20 years visiting him with a 1/2 inch of bullet-proof plexiglass between you.
2006-10-11 18:32:21 · answer #2 · answered by Shinigami 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being old (30), I can say that the bad boy always attracts you first. Being bad, getting in trouble and pushing the envelope are just FUN! But, then you've got to eventually figure out that the bad ones are bad cuz they do stupid and bad things. It's not like it is a surprise.
The nice guys are the ones that actually care about you back. They treat you nice and actually care about your feelings.
Maybe one of these days I'll come to my senses and make myself be attracted to the nice ones. But the bad ones are so damn sexy!
2006-10-11 14:34:15 · answer #3 · answered by Chrissy: The Angry Typer a/k/a Mood Mole 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"Bad boys" is a term that shouldn't even be used. The real term should be "borderline personality disorder" or "emotionally unbalanced" or "borderline anti-social" or "grossly irresponsible and grossly immature" or even "criminal". Other good descriptions of these losers would be, "idiot", "stupid", and "moronic".
You may even want to ask why you say the ex-boyfriends are "far from it" (being saints). Exactly how far from being saints are they? Are they just the less bad version of those other bad losers you were attracted to?
You are not missing out on anything by not linking up with some ridiculous/loser/"bad boy".
Just a note: I am proud to say I have never had a shred of interest in loser-bad-boys.
2006-10-11 16:58:00 · answer #4 · answered by WhiteLilac1 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Read through these answers, you are bound to get a lot of spin. Women by a large do not want to seem as shallow as men. they want to believe that they see relationships and love as more of an emotional thing. That women fall in love with their ears and mind......yeah right.
In spite what they(women) say, they basically go for the 3 Cs: [C]assanovas, [C]ads(bad boys), and [C]ashmen. If you look like a magazine model, you can have a personality of standing tap water, and the smarts of a garden slug, and the women will be knocking themselves out of the way to be on your arm. Second to that is the cads aka bad boys. The main two reasons is that the bad boy adds zip and pop to daily life. An element of danger. It is like having a really fly sports car with crappy mechanics. They look for the times when they can pull up to the curb and have everyone "ooing and awing" They do thier level best to ignore how many time it left them stranded on the roadside. They also think they are "The One". that gals that is so super that they can turn him from his destructive ways by their love. Which they really don't want because then he will be like that bland but dependable car that you know will get you from point 'A' to point 'Z' but with less flash than the sports car. If you are not any of the former, and you are of average looks or less. Money can make you very handsome. David Filo, co-founder of Yahoo said it best. Before Yahoo his average for dates was one out of every four. After Yahoo and several billions later his average is six dates for every four. How is that you say? Girls who before like Paris Hilton who would not even allow him to lick their boots when they came fresh from the cow fields, are slipping him notes saying "call me". And I even heard a gal say "ugly can still pay a car note"
2006-10-15 20:22:45 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bad boys attract us with their "apparent" self confidence, and rebellion that usually is mistaken for independent thinking and unorthodoxy. They frighten us on some level which is exciting in a very instinctive way. They also give the (often false) impression of strength of character as well as body which is something we look for (also a mating instinct). This explains the sexual attraction as well as the sociological aspects. All of which can of course turn out very badly for each of these "strengths" carries with it a high probability of severe "weaknesses" such as insecurity masked as machismo, rebellion which is often irresponsibility, independance which turns out to be intimacy problems and so on. You pick the ones that suit you. So don't beat yourself up. Besides it may just be the old tall dark stranger fantasy and fantasies are meant to be just that: fantasies.
2006-10-15 15:05:38 · answer #6 · answered by stardustandwanderlust 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u missed out on a lot of pain, drama and broken hearts.
It was definately exciting but in the end it was very bad.
and by the way....if you think that nice guys are not that great..think again..at least they treat you with respect and care...bad boys generally don't care because you can get replaced in 4 min.. there is always some other woman around the corner..
2006-10-11 14:36:11 · answer #7 · answered by Feodora 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The bad boy? They are the fun ones!! The ones who live for the moment!!
All you missed was someone who could not commit to you...
If that's what you longed for.. 26 is not too old.. I'll be 26 tomorrow and I'd really like to think that it's not old!
2006-10-11 14:41:14 · answer #8 · answered by SassySista 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i'm a dedicated, proud and practicing 'sweet boy' and i have no intention of changing! i am partial to being rough with the lady after i know them & there's a comfort zone established & the surprise factor is almost totally gone.
i think bad boys are almost extinct bceause society has accepted them that much that no one blinks at their antics it's the bad girl that's slowly coming to the fore here.
age 26 is still young. really young! at 22 you make me feel like a baby!
2006-10-11 15:08:50 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, ALL men are dogs - whether they are goodie two-shoes or lifetime members of the Hell's Angels. And this is coming FROM a man['s man].
Stick to the semi-good ones, 'cause the bad ones will just mess you up...even though you may have a goodslashbad time along the way.
2006-10-11 14:40:17 · answer #10 · answered by ? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋