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Because he (almost) never does. We've been married for four years and I just don't usually hear those things, hardly ever anyway. Is that normal or is that just the way marriage goes?

2006-10-11 14:24:52 · 25 answers · asked by littlenicky 2 in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

25 answers

Most women need to hear these words spoken sincerely and often.
Just as men have needs, women do also. Women need to hear and know they have security that their man really loves them.
We need as women to know that the relationship is okay.

A woman also has a deep need to know that her husband finds her beautiful. We don't want to know if we are just presentable, we want to know that we fascinate/attract our love by our features/our presence.

Are you normal? ABSOLUTELY !

Is it normal in marriage taking another for granted and not communicate and express this? Sorry to say, it happens often.
Should it be that way? DEFINITELY No.

We as wives need to be told we are beautiful and are loved deeply on a very REGULARLY basis.

It is very painful for a woman to have to endure this. I wish men understood this...and if they do, care enough to share their love for their wives by their words and compliments and actions.


Maybe you and he can read a copy of the book
"For Men Only" by Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn. You probably could borrow it from your library or have them get a copy in from another library. copyright 2006 by Multnomah. You might be able to find it at a Christian bookstore, order from them or a bookstore, or over the internet.

And...There is a book "For Women Only" to help us understand men also.

2006-10-11 14:52:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

it's not about the way marriage goes it's the personality of the man. some men are not real expressive and some are then there are some who talk too much. try to draw the affection out if your aren't doing it already. tell him how good he looks how nice he smells how you appreciate him for the man that he is. let him get use to all those compliments then start telling him (not nagging) very often how much you would like to hear from him how he appreciates you for the woman and the wife that you are. his love will show in his actions and as soon as he starts feeling comfortable in giving you compliments he will soon start telling you how much he loves you. if he treats you with love and respect and takes care of you and the home then be a little patient with him until he gets use to being more expressive. if he treats you bad on top of not telling you he loves you then i guess you need to go. good luck

2006-10-11 21:45:00 · answer #2 · answered by sexylousleo 2 · 0 0

Well, it's not uncommon for couples to become complacent once they've made the commitment to be together forever. More often than not, it's just assumed that the other knows how the first one feels. I've made that mistake, as I'm sure countless others have as well. However, I now do tell my wife everyday that I love her, and she does to me as well. Things like that might seem unimportant in the daily rush of things, but it is still nice to be reminded that you are important and also loved. I'm guessing that you tell him that you love him, right? I suppose then that yes, to a point, it is normal to assume that your spouse just knows these things. Maybe a gentle reminder on your part will do the trick. I hope this helps, hon! Good luck and God Bless!

2006-10-11 21:32:53 · answer #3 · answered by kevin_p0 3 · 0 0

I have to say it can be common for affection to go out the window as the relationship goes along.. but that doesn't mean it's okay. He probably does think you're beautiful and loves you a great deal but just thinks you know how he feels.

Have a good heart-to-heart with him and tell him you still need to hear these things, even 4 years down the track.

2006-10-11 21:30:26 · answer #4 · answered by kmlloveplant 2 · 0 0

is it normal you say. Each man is different some men take notice even when you get a new hair do others couldn't tell. Some men can express themselves better than others also.

Could be that your husband has troubles expressing how he feels and trys to show you by other ways. But nevertheless you need to hear these things as its bothering you. So try and tell him that its important to you that he compliments you and tells you from time to time how he loves you and that your beautiful.

Im sure he'll try .

2006-10-12 00:36:42 · answer #5 · answered by For ever in my Heart 7 · 0 0

My husband and I tell each other we love one another several times a day - been together 3 years, married 1 year....I think it varies depending on the couple. Watch his actions and how he treats you - if he's good to you, he loves you. If he respects you, he loves you. Try saying it to him and see what happens - my grandparents have been married 60 years and I've never heard them say I love you - not once...but my grandpa would do anything for her - and you can just see that in his eyes.

2006-10-11 22:15:40 · answer #6 · answered by Rachel 7 · 0 0

That's pretty much the way marriage goes. If you were expecting to hear it all the time why did you marry a man who doesn't say it all the time?

2006-10-11 22:27:20 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

I guess every once in a while he should. I'm only 13 and of course I'm not married but I hardly hear my parents saying that but they love each other very much and it seems perfectly normal.

2006-10-11 21:28:23 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

My husband says everyday, "have i told you how beautiful you are today?"
He also says I love you everyday. That he loves me So much.
I am lucky though, I have one of those #10, fairy tale marriages that you see in movies.
My husband is also a tough guy. Incredibly smart, very good looking, makes great money, he is the whole package.
We have been married two years.

2006-10-11 21:32:06 · answer #9 · answered by Honey 3 · 0 0

I've been married to my SOUL MATE for over 12 years and EVERY single day my husband tells me I'm beautiful. His nicknames for me are Gorgeous, Sexy and Boo. Don't let it be the norm in your relationship, communicate with him maybe he doesn't realize that he's slacked off. But it's definitely not the normal unless I'm just lucky enough to be with a man that believes in showing me love not just telling me he loves me. I honestly think my husband has become more endearing over the years

2006-10-11 21:30:53 · answer #10 · answered by ♥Shortie♥ 5 · 0 0

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