its 13 weeks noe since my husband died and it only seems to be getting worse
2006-10-11 12:09:55 · 25 answers · asked by judith c 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
So sorry to hear of your sad loss. I know exactly what you are going through, my wife died almost 14 months ago we had been together for almost 35years, since the age of 15. It still hurts terribly & I have tears nearly every day. Sorry to say but all this talk of time heals to me is a load of nonsense, I feel as bad now, if not worse, as when she first died. What helps me is remembering all the wonderful, loving times that we had together, our 4 wonderful children & the thought that this beautiful, caring person chose me to spend her life with. Try to spend time with family & friends, talk & laugh about the things you did together, remember the good times & try to get on with your life. Like me you will probably have bad days & days that arent so bad, just try to make good use of the days that arent so bad. Try to keep smiling. God Bless from a fellow sufferer.
2006-10-12 02:05:26 · answer #1 · answered by wayforwardhow 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm very sorry to hear of your loss. I can't imagine how you must feel.
It really hasn't been a long time. I don't know how long you and your husband were together but 13 weeks is a very short time to even start to feel better.
I really think it would be helpful for you to talk to a professional who can help you through things. Things will get better with time and I'm sure you've heard that a lot recently but sometimes it helps to speak to somone who can help you understand what you are feeling.
I wish you all the best.
2006-10-11 12:18:02 · answer #2 · answered by Purple 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can't imagine what you be going through but I offer my deepest heartfelt condolences.
I would think that it's going to take a lot of TLC from the one's you love that are left behind grieving with you and an enormous amount of time.
Nobody can truly be where you are right now and make you feel any better I'm afraid because nobody knew the brevity of the love you shared, so just get through each day as best you can and eventually it will stop hurting.
2006-10-11 12:15:52 · answer #3 · answered by Lorraine R 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hi, Very sorry to hear about your loss...my Dad died 15 months ago & my Mum said she felt like her heart was breaking - she got worse a couple of months after he died, which according to the Dr is normal as you go into shock initially.
From my Mums experience I think I can safely say - you never REALLY get over it - but the old cliche is true...tiem does heal (although not completely) - my Granddad died in 2000 & my Nan still misses him loads.
If, like my Mum you get very depressed when you're alone see a specialist bereavement counsellor - Mums was brilliant & she started showing signs of improvement in her attitude soon after her 1st session.
Whatever you do make sure you're not alone at Xmas or at any time of celebration (eg his birthday, your birthday, your wedding anniversary etc) or at any time when you feel low...true friends & good family help a lot.
Good Luck x
2006-10-11 12:20:39 · answer #4 · answered by Lisa 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry for you. The feelings you have will never go away but they will become easier to live with, you will be able to smile and laugh at your memories, it just doesn't feel like it at the moment.
It may sound silly but get a pet. You need company or you will become more and more depressed. See your doctor and ask for grief counselling, it helps a lot, trust me. They put you in touch with people in the same boat, you comfort each other and even go out to dinner as a group, it reminds you what you have to live for.
If you have children, then now is the time to stick together they need you just as much as you need them.
You will be fine, You will get on with your life and most of all You WILL be happy again, I PROMISE!
2006-10-11 13:55:02 · answer #5 · answered by flibertyjib 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Oh honey, i am so sorry. Losing a loved one is never easy and to be totally honest i dont think you will ever get over losing him, you will just learn to cope as time goes on. Just let the grieving process begin and let it last for as long as it needs to. How about a bereavement counsellor? I am sure this will help you. I hope you have lots of family and friends to support you right now. I do wish you well.
2006-10-11 12:13:37 · answer #6 · answered by english_rose10 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You may never get over it, some days will seem harder than others but the pain will get easier with time. Life is for living and you must live your life now and look forward to the future.
Take Care.
2006-10-11 12:29:15 · answer #7 · answered by XhappytalkX 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry to hear your news. Keep your head up and remain strong because i am sure that your husband would want that of you.
He will always be in your heart and your memorys but each day that passes you will find it easier.
Give your self time it will get easier i promise
2006-10-11 22:23:03 · answer #8 · answered by blondegirl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First.....go to the chat room called widows and widowers. You will find many people in there who have been through it and can help you. You will not feel so alone in your misery.
Second....Get counseling and KEEP BUSY. Let your friends and family help you.
Third....Help others. Sometimes focusing on the needs of others can help you to feel better.
Last.....grieve in your own way and as long as you need to and don't let anyone tell you anything different
2006-10-11 22:44:27 · answer #9 · answered by xovenusxo 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry for your loss. Pls get some help from your doctor. You need to talk about this with someone. Time really is a great healer. Best wishes x
2006-10-11 13:28:23 · answer #10 · answered by star28 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋