I'm 26. My paternal Grandmother just passed away on Monday. My bio father left us when I was 4. My mother has resentment for my father's family and will not be attending the funeral and neither will my brother because they think funerals are for the living. I kept in contact with my Grandmother through letters, cards and gifts on her birthday. I feel so horrible that I couldn't be closer to her or say goodbye. I am pretty sure that I am going to go to the funeral but I am not sure if I should just go to the service, quietly pay my respects, and then leave. Or should I call my father first rather than just showing up unexpected? I really am not ready for a realtionship with my bio father, but I would like to pay my respects to my grandmother. I also don't want to make anyone uncomfortable by attending.
2006-10-11 06:54:41 · 6 answers · asked by ND 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
If you and Grandma kept in contact all these years you have every right to be there at the funeral, She IS your Grandmother. what anyone should think about you attending or not, really shouldnt matter.. Your there to pay your respects and say so long to a woman who you cared for, dont let what others may think keep you from going and if your not ready for a relationship with your bio dad, thats ok, just go, pay your respects and leave quietly.
2006-10-11 07:54:14 · answer #1 · answered by Nani 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You as a grandchild have the right to both pay your respects and attend the funeral. Just showing up will prove that you loved her.If you have nothing to say to your father, then don't.A funeral is a time to do what you want to do,that will help in your grieving.Trust me on this,go ahead with what your heart tells you to do. Deepest sympathy for your loss.Who knows at your age you may find out you like your Dad.
2006-10-11 07:15:26 · answer #2 · answered by Maw-Maw 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she is ur grandmother and if u want to go the funeral then go no one is stopping u!!! u dont have to talk to ur dad there. if u dont feel right then u can leave. just as long as u paid ur respect to ur grandmother that's all that really matters!!! who care what anybody has to say about it!!! if u make anyone uncomfortable OH WELL!!!
2006-10-11 07:00:11 · answer #3 · answered by mustangsweetthing 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are the child and should not be the one feeling uncomfortable...it is also not your place to worry about ur fathers feelings. he hasn't contacted you in years and may not even recognize u. go to the funeral and pay ur respects if that is what u feel u need to do. don't worry urself about anything else.
2006-10-11 06:57:51 · answer #4 · answered by and now you know 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Probably should even if you don't like the idea now. Look at it this way: You can't loose anything. Besides, how will you feel ten or twenty years from now?
2006-10-11 07:00:27 · answer #5 · answered by K.S. THiS 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you do what is best for you....sometimes let lying dogs lie, is a good choice, he has been out of your life since 4....opening a can of worms may not be in your best interest...If you meet, and there is nothing there from him, you'll just feel let down again...Or don't go...you don't HAVE to, unless you feel you have to.....
2006-10-11 07:00:50 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋