figure and telling them what to do or using discipline??????
2006-10-11 01:41:18 · 7 answers · asked by chazzer 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
it is a package deal...You can not expect to be in a relationship with someone who has kids and not be looked at as a father figure or expected to for that matter.Just use caution in this role till you know for sure what she is comfortable with and how much of the role she wants you to play...These sort of thing are complicated.GOOD LUCK
2006-10-11 01:44:44 · answer #1 · answered by thunder_rainclouds 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It should have been established from day one that you are not their friend, but a father figure with rules to be followed.
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As an aside (because I had to leave for work), my son and my fiance (we are getting married on Friday) have always had the authority figure relationship established, once I introduced them. My son tried a couple of times to get smart with him and i quickly told him that John is NOT a friend but is my boyfriend and is to be treated with respect. And once John and I became even more serious, I told Andrew that what John says goes and that he has the right to discipline him (that doesn't mean smack him) if he feels that something that my son did was out of line.
If you start off being friends with your girlfriends children, it is much harder to establish a 'father figure' relationship with them. They will feel betrayed in that what they thought the relationship was isn't true and is really something else; the children will feel tricked and no longer trust you.
But I also want to make note that if the children's father is around you need to sit with him and the mother to set ground rules. You don't want to step on his toes at all.
2006-10-11 08:47:57 · answer #2 · answered by FaerieWhings 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
to be a great father is to be a friend to your kids!
you can still discipline the kids if the are out off line even if you are friends
2006-10-11 08:46:39 · answer #3 · answered by sweet - angel 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When he helps support them, disciplines them and does things for them only a father would do.
2006-10-11 08:45:05 · answer #4 · answered by Billys girl 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When you start setting rules and expectations. When you become more involved in their life and activities.
2006-10-11 08:54:45 · answer #5 · answered by blood_red_mustang 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When he's not minding his own business. If you were horning in on the raising of my son we would have words!
2006-10-11 08:46:43 · answer #6 · answered by St.Anger 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Will need more info ...to answer this one ...
Dr Bad
2006-10-11 08:44:30 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋