Too Sleepy to make lo*ve?

Question

I am asking this question on behalf of a friend. My friend is married and is happy in all aspects. her only complaint is that her husband goes to sleep too early at night. After having dinner, he imediately gets sleepy and doesnt seem to be interested in any "bedtime activities".
Its not as if he is se*xually less active - in other times (like morning) he is always ready. Why does he fall asleep so early?
How can she motivate him to make lo*ve to her at night?

Please give serious answers only.

Answer 1

He should go to a doctor to make sure he doesn't have some sort of sleep disorder like sleep apnea which can make one tired all the time. Next, an improper diet and lack of exercise can sap ones energy. He does get sexually aroused, but in the morning, rather than at night. The couple you are describing may just have different times when they can be sexually aroused. Maybe they can have an earlier meal, plan a specific time for lovemaking (like a date) and have some lovemaking in the morning for his sake (compromise can be a good thing). My biggest concern is the constant fatigue. Try a doctor first for him, then go from there.

Answer 2

Not a big issue. Menfolk are sexually more active at the early morning and that's what relates to the latter part of the problem. Sleeping early & easy could be due to many reasons viz.: work ressure, tiredness, full stomach or may be he is getting prepared for the act in the morning.

I believe that your friend MUST talk to him and if they find it possible they could add some variety to the thing by way of having it bothe ways - at about dinner as well as early morning. Then they can find out and stick to the best one.

The most important part of the thing is satisfaction of the duo and that cannot be guaranteed by a third person. LET THEM TALK ABOUT IT & DECIDE FOR THEMSELVES.

Answer 3

Married couples don’t have enough sex because of the pace of modern life. Or because they have small children in the house. Or because of communication problems and resentments that have built up over the years. All true. What married couple doesn’t struggle with these challenges?

But there’s another reason for low-sex marriage this might sound harsh, but the truth is, for a lot of people it was never that good to begin with. I mean good in the sense of being truly physically satisfying.

In the beginning of a relationship, sex might be exciting or fun or sweet, but not really physically satisfying. If that's the way it was for you, you probably remember that when your relationship was new, it didn't matter so much. The newness itself lent excitement to everything. Also, in the beginning, it felt wonderful just to be close and never mind the details. But now that you’re married, you’ve got plenty of togetherness. Sometimes it feels like way too much togetherness.

Double or triple that if you’ve got small children. Your idea of sensual bliss might be an entire evening without anyone touching you at all. Or an extra hour of sleep. Under these conditions, sex is not going to interest you unless you know it’s going to be really, really good.

OK, then what do you have to do to make it really, really good?

That would be the ideal approach. But when it comes to sex, it's usually not that simple. It's hard to admit it's not all it could be. You don't want to hurt your partner's feelings. And you don't want to get hurt, either. You might be afraid to find out what your partner is thinking:
"What if he doesn’t find me attractive any more?"
"What if I’m not good enough for him?"
And the husband is so busy with his proffesion/bussiness - It’s easier to focus on other things and let sex take a back seat.

Most likely, your worst fears are unfounded. There's nothing dire going on at all. Any problem starts to look like a dragon when you don’t talk about it. This is especially true of sexual issues because we have such strong feelings about them.

Chances are, your sex life just needs a little attention. That's why I suggest a very gentle approach. You don’t have to have a heavy conversation about the meaning of sex in your relationship. And please, don’t try to figure out whose fault it is you’re not having more sex. I guarantee you that will not make either of you feel sexier!

Just think in terms of getting re-acquainted with your partner. Ask him what he likes. And tell him what you like in a gentle, positive way. Say what you want more of, not want you don’t like. "You know, I really like it when you touch me right here."

Breaking a pattern feels awkward at first. Those comfortable married habits have a powerful momentum! Don’t expect a 180 turnaround. Just aim to open the door and get comfortable talking about sex in a loving way. Then you can both gradually guide each other to more satisfying sex. I'm sure you'd both really love that.

The hardest part is taking the first step. That takes guts. Someone has to decide it's worth it. Will that someone be you?
Wishing your friend Good Luck>

Answer 4

Sounds to me like he is just too tired at night. The older a man gets, the less energy he has, so he needs more rest. Short of a drink from the Fountain of Youth, I guess your friend will have to be satisfied with morning se*x. She should count her blessings, in fact. Some men lose their virility with age, so can not perform at all. Believe me, I know!

Answer 5

This is a rather serious issue. Inform your friend not to heavy serve food For e.g. food with lot of fat, curd rice, etc. Else, if he is more addicted to tea or coffee inform your friend to give her husband a cup full of tea or coffee before serving food. This will keep him awake for hours and will also remove his fatigueness.

Your friend should dress sensually and should try to grab his attention towards her. This surely will interests her husband to play some love games at anytime.

If your friend's problem is resolved then do let me know at [e-mail]

Answer 6

eat something light for dinner instead of a heavy meal.
Just think after people eat Thanksgiving dinner they immediately get tired and go to bed ... this is what your husband is doing. He's filling himself; then gets tired and goes to bed. If you make something light ... he will stay up longer w/you.

Answer 7

Hi Devika,
He may be a bit old or having too physically tiring official routine.So he feels tired in the evenings and fresh in the mornings ready for the act.
May be a little nap or a luxurious siesta will do a world of good.

I wish you ping me in [e-mail]!

Answer 8

Try dropping hints or teasing him before dinner. Start planting the seed before he leaves for work and continue doing so through out the day if you can speak with him while he's at work.

Answer 9

She should talk to him about making time for her in the evening. This is a huge communication gap between them. I think that if she were to tell him how much she wanted him before bed, he would be happy to take care of her. Maybe he just doesn't realize what is going on.

Answer 10

actually tell ur friend that having sex at morning time is not bad at all. but if ur friend is too much interested in night sex tell her to lay the dinner after having sex or tell her to give her husband some energy drinks with the dinner.