what should I do about my desire to have a baby?

Question

I am almost 19 years old and I have been wanting to have a baby now for many years. since i was 16. i know i am young and i am planning on going to university this year. i am usually very practical but i cannot seem to get rid of this feeling. every time i see a parent and child, or a mother with her new baby, i want to have my own. everytime i get my period i am a little dissappointed. although i wouldnt perpously get pregnant at this time in my life, i wouldnt mind getting accidentally pregnant by my boyfriend of over 2 years. why am i getting these feelings and what can i do about them?

Answer 1

WAIT. You can offer so much more to a child once you have your education. If your maternal instincts are so strong, why don't you get a job helping in a child care facility or babysitting? That way you can practice your mommy skills too, and your child will be better off.

Answer 2

First of all nobody is really finanically ready for a baby. Age doesnt determine if your going to be a good mother or not. I think getting "accidently" pregnant by your boyfriend isnt the right thing to do or very fair to him. Its something you 2 should decide together. I really would advise you to finish college first. I had my first baby at 17 and I've thought I'd always go to college, but then u just get caught up in living life and then the money isnt there anymore because kids are so expensive. Maybe get a puppy to help you with your baby fever. They're very needy and honestly like having to take care of a baby. Good luck on whatever you decide to do.

Answer 3

It's normal for women to get a 'mother feeling', but at your age, you're a little too young. Yes, I know I've seen 14 year olds have children too. My mom got pregnant with me when she was 19 too. I still think it's SMART to wait until your well in your 20's. Finish your schooling first! That's the wise choice since you can't go wrong that way. I'd wait also until you've been married until you have a child. I know this sounds old fashioned. I'm not saying not to have sex, but to wait until you're married before you have children and have a husband who is willing to help you with the demands and responsiblities of having a child. I was 30 years old before I had my 1st baby!! I'm 35 now and have 2 great children. One is 4 1/2 and the other is 14 months. I'm so glad I waited and didn't get pregnant at your age. I was able to earn my college degree and marry before I had my children. I'd suggest to offer to babysit other people's children..especially babies so you get an idea how it's like and you can prepare yourself when you do have the chance to become a mother! It's great, but it's very demanding and you don't want to be getting up 3-4 times a night with a newborn when you're trying to attend university! Trust me!!

Answer 4

What you can do, is think about the things you want for your child, and how simple everything could be if you just waited. I was the same way. Believe me, I was the same way. All I could think about through high school was having a baby.. but my Aunt sat me down and explained to me that waiting until I was a little older was the best thing that I could do.

She told me that just wanting to have a baby was selfish, and if I really wanted to have a child ... I would do it right. That means, waiting until you can offer a baby all the things she needs and wants without having to struggle to get it. Wait until you have a good job, and a stable home of your own with a husband (or long-time boyfriend).. wait until you have everything that you need to make having a baby a great experience instead of struggling to make ends meet and resenting your life.

Go to college, get a good job, have a happy and healthy home, and then have the baby that you always wanted. Thinga are so much better when you wait for the right time to have it.

Answer 5

If you truly WANT to be a mother, then you should also want to be a good mother. Think of the next few years as planning and preparation for the mother you will become. Finish college and strive to get a great job so you can support yourself and your child in a proper way. Babies cost tons of money, even if you are careful with your money. Marry your boyfriend before you take this lifelong step. One of the rgeatest gifts you can give a child is stability--this comes from being in a committed, married relationship, and from having a stable financial situation--you must know you will be able to provide for your child, offer her a proper home. Please do not pursue getting pregnant until you can feel certain you could provide financially for this child.

Answer 6

I will advise u to suppress that maternal feeling till u are matured and in a steady and commited relationship like marriage to make and nurture babies. Sweet heart u must wait for the right time and its very normal to feel maternal when around children or babies but it takes a lot of patience and steadfastness to carry a pregn. to term and care for the baby after birth, so girl go to school get a good education and pls no accidental pregn. because u must be emotionally ready to take that leap into adulthood, so girl pls play safe no mischief.

Answer 7

I use to be like that now I'm over 21 and I have a job and am on the edge getting married. I gave birth to a beautifull boy wich happend 7 moths ago I am so thankfull that I have waited a very long time for this. To have a baby is beautifull but you need to be responsible for that baby and raising a baby cost money, remember he needs milk, nappies, clothes, medicine and more.....You need to be financially strong and you really need patientce. If I were you I would Study get a job and first get married then think about babies.

Answer 8

Well the way i see it...its just that you want to be a parent so badly....and i dont think getting pregnant with your boyfriend accidentaly is a good idea....but maybe you should just be mre patient until you get married ( or not ) but the right age to hae a baby so maybe you wont have these feelings anymore....

But when you get one im sure you will know the great responsibilities of taking care of one.....

Answer 9

You are too young to get pregnant! Trust me! I got preg by my boyfriend of 2.5 years accidentaly. I am 16. It is perfectly normal for you to have maternal instincts. Maybe you should get a job in child care.The way, you could practice your mommy skills.

Answer 10

well take your pick do u wan a life struggeling with a baby money and stuff or do u want to get a good education and some money in the bank and a good roof over your heads so that you child does have a good life to look forward to try having some freedom first and some fun before u get tied down.