I’ve always been extremely shy (I have social phobia). It’s always been very hard trying to talk to strangers and I was never able to make many friends.
I recently went to a doctor for my social phobia and am actually starting to feel more comfortable around people. For the first time ever, I have a real interest in meeting people and trying to make new friends. Unfortunately, I’m still finding it pretty hard to talk to strangers because I’ve never had any real experience doing this before… I am just so clueless on what to say to unfamiliar people…
I would appreciate it if you would help me out…
For once in my life I would like to be the one to start a conversation- how do I go about this? How do I keep a conversation going. What things can I ask the person to show that I’m interested in getting to know them? And if the conversation is going well and I am really interested in them, how do I ask if they’d like to hang out with me sometime without sounding like a total loser?
2006-10-10 19:03:55 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
You can start a conversation by commenting on your immediate surroundings. Maybe a favorite song of yours is playing, the weather is especially nice or especially dreary, the air conditioning is really cold, etc. and then move the conversation to a little more personal area by showing interest in the other person and what's going on in their lives, by complimenting the person, etc. Some people just plain won't feel like talking, but most people enjoy someone taking interest in them.
2006-10-10 19:41:16 · answer #1 · answered by Lyf 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well you have made an important step in posting this question and sparking people's interest in you, through their answers. The point is you've got it all there in your head, you sound like a witty and intelligent person so why not?!
The most important thing to realise is friendships are based on attractions i.e having things in common. Therefore when initiating things find a reason, however flimsy to initiate that conversation, it could be in a coffee house, accidentally bumping into someone at college, the possibilities are virtually endless the main point is once that spark is initiated if it is meant to be it will take hold. Don't be worried if it doesn't work all the time, because it is like any skill you are learning and need to experiment, but remember ti never give and then you will learn more about yourself and your confidence will grow. Good luck my friend, I'm sure it will work out!
2006-10-10 19:11:46 · answer #2 · answered by waggy 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
First, there is nothing to fear but fear itself.
Next, relaxed body language and a little smile when eyes meet.
Then, sense the positive energy directed at you and say Hello!
There, you have just initiated the conversation you always wanted to.
Walk up to the person and introduce yourself.
It is always good to explore common interests before asking someone out. When there is enough familiarity, it just happens naturally.
2006-10-10 19:31:50 · answer #3 · answered by SS 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask them about where they work, and how its going for them and stuff. Just ask whatever you want, they will know you are interested in getting to know them. If you have something in common, like music or something, you can invite them to go with you to a concert or something. Or just ask if they wanna go get lunch. Dont think too hard, just go with the flow
2006-10-10 19:08:05 · answer #4 · answered by fall 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Compliment another person or something about them...their clothes, their hair, something...say something nice to someone and it's surprising how conversations can blossom. Be interested in them. Try to steer away from talking about yourself...be interested in what they do, what they think, how they feel. If you must make a statement say something that begins with "I feel....", "I've felt..." or "I've found...." ....something about your own discoveries. And they don't have to be great things...just tell people who you are in that way. It seems less dogmatic that way.
2006-10-10 19:09:31 · answer #5 · answered by Sleepee 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
People love to talk about them selves, so open with: tell me where you got that shirt, or "great tan, do you ski?" is good. If you ask "who, why and how" questions they'll do the talking and think you had great conversation
2006-10-10 19:06:19 · answer #6 · answered by Claus 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your question is very detailed. All i could say is to start with the basics (e.g. hi, how are you) try talk about current news that might relate to the other person.
2006-10-10 19:08:10 · answer #7 · answered by JonZ 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am the same way, i would say don't start the conversation, let the conversation come to you. And i personally like just standing on the wall and making friends with the people that are there too. sorry i couldn't help more, but thanks for the 2pts!!
2006-10-10 21:42:40 · answer #8 · answered by Confused & Young 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Hello there!U just have to be confident about urself.Always think Positive & be confident at all time.Never let in creep any negative thoughts in your mind.
2006-10-10 19:16:33 · answer #9 · answered by naughtybipasha 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
with a smile, honey. it shows even if you're on the phone...
remember, a smile is a curve that makes everything straight.
2006-10-10 19:10:34 · answer #10 · answered by butch garcia 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋