im in a 5 year marrige and my wife is always fighting and screaming and i cant take it anymore i have stayed with her for a year because of my 3 year old son , should i continue to stay or is it best to leave i dont want to lose my son but i cant take the abuse anymore and someone said that it is bad to stay in a relationship because of a child what to do
2006-10-10 18:29:56 · 16 answers · asked by jason_narsil 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Same thing happen to me and my EX WIFE. I finally could not take it any more and left. It is worse to stay in a bad relationship with children, because all in all they are the ones who pay for it. Get out for his sake!
By the way, I have both my girls. So it worked out for all of us.
2006-10-10 18:35:33 · answer #1 · answered by lifescircle 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you've explored and tried all other avenues including medical exams and the situation doesn't appear to be caused by that and still persists then you might consider trying just a separation at first ,,,,, Move out for a while ,,,,, give it three months and see what happens ,,,,,, If by then it still isn't working then maybe you should consider divorce ,,,,,, I know this ,,,,, If there is allot of unrest in the home and there is termoil and tension then the child can feel this and that's not good ,,,,,,, I know that it's always said that two people should stay together for the sake of the children ,,,,, but that isn't true always ,,,,,, Sometimes it's best for the children if there is a divorce or at least a separation ,,,,, When some one asks me for advise ,,,, the last thing I do is to tell them they should do anything ,,,,, And I know that you will probably get allot of answers telling you to do this that or the other ,,,,,,,, No one but you can decide what to do really ,,,,,,,, I would say that you do have options though ,,,,, You just have to figure out which ones best fits you because it's only you in that situation not anyone else ,,,,, Some of the questions you might ask yourself is ,,,,Do I really want a divorce ,,,, Do I still love her ,,,, What may have happened to set this off ,,,,, Is there anything I can do to change things,,,,,You might ask her point blank what her problem is ,,,,, If you haven't already ,,,, There are all kinds of things you need to sit down and go over in your mind ,,,,, But don't let anyone ,,,, especially family influence you ,,,, Do your own thing and do your own thinking and make your own decissions ,,,,,, Good luck with this ,,,, Hope things go for the best ,,,,,,,, Yoda told you this ,,,,,
2006-10-10 20:43:50 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
All that fighting and screaming will do your son no good at all.
If you still love your wife, is it likely you'll be able to talk to her reasonably without her losing her temper? Is there something bugging her or making her constantly angry & frustrated? Can you help her get past it? See if she will agree to counselling. If she's not open to that, then I think it's probably best to distance yourself from the marriage.
I hope it works out for the best for you and your son, whatever you decide. Good Luck.
2006-10-10 18:37:02 · answer #3 · answered by belmyst 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does she know you are ready to leave? Why would she be constantly fighting & screaming and if she is this bad, why would you leave your son with her? You need to sit her down & find out where all of this anger is coming from....it is not healthy for any of you! Do you believe she needs to seek therapy of some kind? If she really is out of control, possibly you could take a break (your son with you) & be away for a few days and she might do some soul-searching. She is angry & she needs to get to the bottom of it & find a cure. If she is as bad as you say......I would not leave my child with her to raise.....if you are a good father & provider then why can't you raise him?
2006-10-10 18:51:24 · answer #4 · answered by Geez Louise 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is better to leave, because your son feels what you are going through. my daughter,, tried to stay in a marriage, where there was a lot of abuse. she couldn't take it anymore, her daughter started feeling the pain, she was going through, crying a lot,nightmares etc. sometimes it is worse to stay in a bad marriage.maybe you and your wife can get counseling, and that might help her to see she is destroying your family. but by all means you should do what is best for you and your son. my granddaughter was 4yrs at the time,she is 6 now and adjusted very well.good luck
2006-10-10 18:44:05 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No one and answer this questions for you. You need to make this decision from your heart...A marriage will never work if your in it only for a child. You will not lose you son if you leave that is what the courts are for. Kids are smarter that adults give them credit for and sooner or later he will notice the tension. You deserve better than what she is giving you. You seem like a good hearted person and you will be a better person if you are in a loving relationship. Good luck with you decision it is not easy to decide to follow you head or your heart.
2006-10-10 19:13:04 · answer #6 · answered by chick29 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it depends on what uve been fighting for,if its because your ego, then somebody will have to compromised, if its something that both of u cant fix anymore, then u should leave..abusive marriage is bad for ur son too..its not like he doesnt realize whats happening, children absorbs everything from their environment.Its better if u sepparate in peace and become friends for ur sons good, than to stay in ur abusive marriage. Either way, you should talk 2 ur wife about this, and try not to fight...ok??Good luck..
2006-10-10 18:40:59 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you still love her...stay and try to work it out. I was pretty stressed out when my boys were toddlers. Mom's take on a lot of inner stress that is hard to explain..Im not sure if you understand what she is screaming about or not...have you talked about it? Is it repairable? If yes..stay..if definately no..and you dont love her...then go...your son will be ok..especially without the fighting.
2006-10-10 18:34:18 · answer #8 · answered by jessified 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am recently divorced 3 months ago. My X husband was very abusive in every way. I left because I don't want my daughter OR my son to grow up thinking that is how you let someone treat you Or how you treat someone else. It becomes a vicious cycle.
2006-10-10 19:07:38 · answer #9 · answered by venus3661 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A child should never be the reason that two people stay together.
If you're unhappy and you don't see the marriage working out; than you should go...
If you think there might be hope - try marriage counceling or something of the sort? Maybe there's hope beyond what you think?
2006-10-10 18:32:36 · answer #10 · answered by llsoinlovell 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋