I met up with I guy I use to date. We had had sex in the past but that part of my life was over and I made it clear to him that I wanted nothing to do with him sexualy. I went over to his house to visit and he began hitting on me. I asked him to stop but he wouldnt. Then he started pressuring me to sleep with him making me feel like owed him for what we had and things he had done for me in the past. He kept beging me then telling me I wasnt a real friend and that I owed him one last time. He started to touch me and kiss me and I asked him stop and he did but then went back to telling me how I oweed him and he deserved one more time with me. He acted like he would no longer be my friend if I didnt screw him and that I would be part of his life everagain. So eventualy I just said ok and let him. I laid there while he tried to enter me and I couldnt get wet I felt horrible and discusted as he was doing this and couldnt beleive I let this happen to me. Now I'm so sick from what happened.
2006-10-10 15:39:10 · 14 answers · asked by jessica 1 in Health ➔ Women's Health
it was consented. you did lay there and let him do his duty. although you told him no,no, and repeatedly no, he did not seem to care about your answer. this is really tough. you kept saying no, but you eventually just let him to shut him up. actually, i would say yes you were honey. the situation seemed like it would turn ugly if you didn't. you should seek professional help and tell someone right away about this. someone pressuring you do have sex is absolutely not the right thing and he can go to jail for that. seek help. he is not a friend if he needs sex to full fill his friendship with you.
2006-10-10 15:48:29 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I'm sorry baby girl. No where did I hear you say no, stop, I am not here for this and you could have left at any time. You feel raped but what happened was you let yourself be manipulated and used by this lousy excuse of a man and now you feel used, raped and your self esteem must be at it's lowest.
The only thing you can do is tell yourself that you will never ever be used by anyone again for any reason. Talk to yourself and convince yourself that you are a good person and your friendship is worth more than a roll in the sack with a scum bag.
If you didn't use protection, get tested and again in 6 mos. You need to get some new friends and believe more in yourself than you do now. Talk to yourself, you have to get your self respect back so you won't feel like this. Tell yourself every day outloud that you are a good person and a good friend and no one is going to use you again. You are a good person and you are worth more than that. Every day tell yourself all the good things you are. OK?
Stay away from him and if you know girls that he goes around tell them to be careful and stay away from him. He's a pig. I'm sorry this happened to you but, you have the power to say NO, and walk away and don't let anyone talk you into doing anything you don't want to do. You have that right!!! May God bless you and keep you safe and clear this out of your mind and bring you new hope and new experiences that are positive and build up your self esteem because He made you in His image. Blessings on you.
Oh Jason, does your wife know you did this to a friend of yours or are you keeping nasty little secrets from her, hummmmm.....wish I could talk to her.
2006-10-10 22:59:03 · answer #2 · answered by MISS-MARY 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This guy sounds like a sleazy a**hole. You definitely didn't owe him anything and you probably should have left him when he kept on hitting on you after you had said no the first several times. If some says "you're not a real friend" if you don't -- then they're the ones not being a true friend. With friends like him -- who needs enemies?
If you told him to stop even after he began attempting coitus, then you might have a case but if you said it was ok then you probablty don't.
P.S. Not all men are a**holes but this one definitely was and I'm sorry you had to go through that horrible experience.
2006-10-10 22:57:27 · answer #3 · answered by Dr. Nightcall 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, that is a form of rape. You said no and he kept pressuring you. He's also not a very good friend if he told you that you owed him for anything. That's not a good reason for anyone to pressure anyone else into having sex. Your feelings are natural and I really hope that you have some good friends or an adult that you can talk to.
2006-10-10 22:45:51 · answer #4 · answered by jen2192000 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You said ok and let him. That means it wasn't rape. I'm sorry this happened to you, but try to learn from it. You could have walked out of this situation long before it became difficult. You told him that you wanted nothing to do with him sexually. Then he started hitting on you. You asked him to stop but he wouldn't. That would have been the perfect time for an exit. Learn from this experience and don't let the situation get out of control. Better to end a date early than to end a date badly.
2006-10-10 22:45:21 · answer #5 · answered by Gypsy Girl 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you did not want to do this but you consented to it I don't know if it is rape or not you need to speak to a professional about this like a counselor or someone like that I hope you get the help you need.
P.S. I don't know if you believe in him but when I need someone to talk to God is always there 24 hours a day.
God Bless you
2006-10-10 23:03:07 · answer #6 · answered by tmkhrstn 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You were not date raped , you let him disrespect you like a commoner . you ask for that by going up to his apartment . how in the world could you owe him anything ? It 's not like you borrowed money from him. what have you learned in your young life ? NOTHING ! have more respect for yourself than that. He's not worth two nickles rubbed together to think you owe him anything.
2006-10-10 22:54:46 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well it was consensual to say the least, but you did make a mistake. He was the aggressor, obviously, so you shouldn't beat yourself up too much about it, but just make a commitment to stay as clean as you can from now on until marriage. If that is possible, then you won't have anymore regrets.
2006-10-10 22:42:23 · answer #8 · answered by Mister 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is not considered rape because you did say OK. It sounds like you could have left, and he did guilt you into saying OK, but that is not rape. I'm sorry he made you feel like you had to sleep with him, but you did have a choice.
2006-10-11 01:06:58 · answer #9 · answered by Jenn 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unwanted sexual touch or sexual use of someone through force or coercion is rape. To coerce someone sexually is to get them to engage in a sexual activity they do not want through guilt-trips or nagging, threats, bribes, intimidation or some other kind of emotional pressure or force
2014-10-31 16:28:52 · answer #10 · answered by Shane 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋