why do the even "pretty people" have low self-esteems?

Question

like i know this girl who is really pretty. she looks like a model and has basically very few physical flaws, and yet i can tell she has low self esteem, by the way she always points out that "one eye is bigger than the other" or "i look like an alien!" or something like that.
i mean, i understand if people have been made fun of being "not perfect" before and that has caused them to have bad self images, but everyone thinks this girl, for example is gorgeous and yet she does not believe so. how does that work?

Answer 1

ever hear of self-denial?

Answer 2

No one is ever satisfied! People never appreciate their good qualities. If you have great hair you hate your teeth. If you have a nice body you think your eyes are too close together. The tall want ti be shorter and the short want to be taller. Really, there is no true answer to this question. society has made ther image of "beauty" so unattainable that even those "pretty people" you speak of spend hours wondering how that can make themselves look better. Even super models aren't as pretty as they appear in magazines and on TV. After editing, touch ups, proper lighting, airbrushing, make up and hair stylist... anyone could look like a million bucks. Low self-esteem shouldn't be as common as it is. If people learned to appreciate that beauty in every one of us, we would have alot less depression in today's youth.

Answer 3

I mean, let's face it this girl you've mentioned is having feelings of inadequacy or insecurities as pointed by you, low in self-esteem.
Usually when someone has it, they automatically assume their not at their "best", which includes not liking what they see in the mirror on a daily basis.
After all, even "pretty" people are just that sometimes... HUMAN. Heck I have insecurities too. Who doesn't??
The most important thing is to tap into other areas of yourself that you find attractive/ positive i.e. personality, intellect, skill, etc & be empowered by that.
I know it's easier said than done but it's worth a shot.

Answer 4

That's just our society now. People, especially the media, put too much pressure on how a person looks rather than their personality. We always here the phrase "don't judge a book by its cover", but no one ever follows it. Unless a person is really satisfied with themselves and has a lot of self-confidence, the fact of the matter is that people will always pick at something wrong with their body (no matter how insignificant it is). That's why girls with curly hair want straight hair and girls with straight hair want curly hair. Fat people want to be skinny, and skinny people, sometimes, want to gain more weight. I don't think people will ever be satisified with themselves unless the media stops putting that pressure (and its already started with that ban on skinny models in Italy I think).

Answer 5

Self Esteem is a sense of personal worth and ability that is fundamental to an individual's identity. Family relationships during childhood are believed to play a crucial role in its development. Parents may foster self-esteem by expressing affection and support for the child as well as by helping the child set realistic goals for achievement instead of imposing unreachably high standards. Karen Horney asserted that low self-esteem leads to the development of a personality that excessively craves approval and affection and exhibits an extreme desire for personal achievement. According to Alfred Adler's theory of personality, low self-esteem leads people to strive to overcome their perceived inferiorities and to develop strengths or talents in compensation...

I take this to mean the level a person's sense of self-worth is not directly connected to or dependent how the person looks. Your friend may be beautiful to you, but if no one ever treated this way during her developmental years she wouldn't grow up with a sense that she is beautiful. Any number of factors, could have lead to believe that she isn't good looking and therefore needs to hear from others like you or other friends or males that she's pretty to believe that she is.

Another thing to consider, that I've found to be true is that if a bunch of people tell you are beautiful all the time, you become used to this kind of attention and then one day if people don't respond to you as strongly as they once did, your ego takes a major hit, more so if people never said anything to you before. It feels like all of sudden you are ugly and this leads people to exclaim their flaws in hopes that you'll reassure them they are indeed still very pretty.

Oh and I thing I've also noticed is that my friend is extremely beautiful, everyone thinks so, doesn't want people to think of her only as pretty or that she gets by on her looks. She nevers want to appear to be conceited so instead she puts herself down so that no one ever gets the chance to take her down a notch. If someone is really good looking and is constantly told so by a bunch of people there's no doubt going to be someone that tells them otherwise just be different or put them in their place. So, even if your friend is constantly told she's beautiful, you can be sure someone as told her otherwise and maybe now as defense mechanism she puts her self down before anyone else can...

Answer 6

To some people those few flaws are very big things to them. Yea other pple might see them as beautiful, but becuase of those few things they see themsleves as"ugly". When you are younger and people make fun of you becuase of something, well to some poeple those things stay in the subconsious mind as they grow so in the back of their head they will be thinking, "oh i have this and that wrong with me". Those types of things could be hurtful and it could hurt somebodys self esteem.

Answer 7

I think most everyone finds some fault with themselves. We can be very self-critical at times and "pretty people" are real people like the rest of us so they do it too.

Answer 8

I think that people look at themselves more critical than anyone else. They may not believe that they are pretty so ever time someone may tell them so they will think they are lying ot them. They perceive themselves to a much higher level of standard so they think they are not pretty.

Answer 9

it started from very young age when parents humiliate their child like telling them you are not pretty it will stick to the brain of the child till she grow up. so eventhough this child grew up already even she is physically pretty, she will not feel good of herself. but when a child were boost by the parents telling them that she is pretty though she's not it build strong confidence that no one could put that child down till she grow up..

Answer 10

Because it is easier to except that fact that we are flawed individuals.

Answer 11

why would you want a pretty person to be conceited? better they think they're not so the average can be romantically entangled.