Should I get a divorce to the man I've been with for 16 years if there is no love in our relationship and we f

Question

I was 17 when we were married and had two girls then.Now we have a boy. Our kids are 15 13 and 11. They don't like him at all. My family doesn't like him at all either

Answer 1

Is this man the father of the two girls or just the boy? I am not married and my parents have never had a divorce. I have read and hear of typical situation of children not getting a long with step parents and vice versa. In my opinion love can be very broad. Maybe you need a separation. Divorce can be too legal and complicated.

Answer 2

Divorse is the easy way out and should only be thought of as a last resort. Please I encourage you to expore finding each other again and though it is not easy and a lot of work you might find it more fufilling than the meat market that exists out there.

Relationships hard hard work and it is very easy to float away and grow apart. Not to mention when chilren are involved and though they will survive, it is always better ot operate as a family rather than two seprate individuals.
Seek counseling ias a second to last resort.
Love doesn't just die however it sometimes get forgotten or misplaced. Try real hard to dig deep in your soul for the answer it will come, but don't make a decision quickly. You can bring the family back together if you really want and you do know how>

Good luck

Answer 3

What a sad situation! If there is no love between the two of you, the children will pick up on that. You should go to counseling: as a couple AND as a family. Those kids should be your top priority, which doesn't necessarily mean staying in the marriage... but it shouldn't be the first choice, either.

Answer 4

I think that you need to rethink you decision. You have invested too much time...
Love does not die, it is like energy. Energy is a continum, it keeps growing or it moves in another direction, but the love is still there. You are probably just bored with the routine that your life has become. I think that you should take time and write down what about your life you don't like. Then look at the list and write next to it what you can do to change those things. If you love your husband and your kids you will remember that marriage is FOR BETTER OR WORST, RICHER OR POOR , IN SICKNESS AND HEALTH. That means that you are constantly working to make it better. You are not the same person that you were when you were 17 and you have got to upgrade your relationship to match the changes that life has made in you. It will not be difficult, but it will be change. And that is only hard when you resist it.

Answer 5

Well hun, You have to have love in any relationship for it to work. Unless you are just playing house like a few of my friends. If you don't love him there is no reason for you two to be together.
And 16 years and there is not love there.... Well HELLO! It's not ever going to happen.
And your kids don't like him. They should be your first priority in life! =)
Your family isn't that big of an issue. Although in your case it is, it just tops the cake........
Can you say D-I-V-O-R-C-E........
I'd go for it. I did! And I have found someone that I wouldn't dream of living without now.
I am totally in love. My firsts marriage was a joke. Similar to yours actually....
And don't think you can't find anyone because there is someone out there for everyone.
And your not with your Mr. Right.
Best wishes, and happy hunting! I'd call the lawyer and get this on the ball asap!
♥

Answer 6

The kids don't like him? Is he their father? Do they love him though? How long has your family not liked him? Do you love him? Does he love you? Is or has anyone cheated. When was the last time you loved each other? Anyway I am completely different in my own style of thinking and I have a very different slant on things so don't take it the wrong way, but if he has all the necessary equipment and I mean necessary, and you love it, scr.. everything else, don't talk to him just ...k him, sooner or later you'll smile at each other and you'll be ok.

Answer 7

ok, after reading some of the answers that you got from ppl, i just had to answer this one.

Get out of it as soon as you can. believe me i did the same thing, got married at 17, had children and that was all that my husband and i had in common. well, here i am at age 50 and still in this loveless marriage because i stayed because of the kids. Now my kids ask me why the hell didn't i get out a long time ago. cause they hated their dad.

so take my advice and don't stick around because of the kids, thats just a lame excuse. start over before it is too late.

Answer 8

i'm only 18, but here's how i see it. you've invested sixteen years of your life in this relationship, so this is something you really have to think through before making any decisions. you said that your family doesn't like him; do you know why? maybe he isn't the same person he used to be when you first met. have you talked to him about it? love doesn't die; in fact, most people are lucky to fall in love because so many people miss out on the oppurtunity. until you're abslutely sure there is nothing less that can be done to fix the relationship, you shouldn't go for divorce.

Answer 9

Just because your family doesn't like him, that isn't good enough reason to divorce. The kids, they don't have to like him, they must love him. And you, only you can come up with what you want. If you think the grass is greener on the other side, don't forget it must be mowed. You took a vow, now you either stand for it or fall.

Answer 10

yes life is too short if you dont' love the guy it probably shows he's not dumb. and why waste two lives in the process when you both can look for love elsewhere if thats what your yearning for.

Life is short you wake up and next thing you know you wonder where all the years went.

Do what makes you happy, not to be selfish but staying with someone you dont love and ruining there lives to is also selfish for your own needs .