Should I let my hubby have his fantasy????

Question

Should I get another girl for a threesome? I don't think I'd hate it, I just don't want it to become a habit.

these answers were really great, from both the women AND the men. thanks!

Answer 1

You can't do it if you have any doubts. You may end up resenting him and even yourself. Give it some time, if you are married and love each other you have plenty of time. Keep thinking about it and only do it if you want to 100% in your heart. Talk it through with him, tell him your worries. If you do decide to do it, set rules and boundaries. Good luck.

Answer 2

Is he serious about wanting to make the fantasy a reality, or is it one of those "yeah I've thought about it but the reality probably wouldn't measure up"?

If you're uncomfortable with the idea, or if you have *any* jealousy or self-esteem issues, my recommendation would be no, don't do it.

You need to look beyond the threesome and into the aftermath. How will you feel? How will he feel? Will you wonder if he's wishing he were with someone else instead of you? Will you be upset if he pays more attention to "her" than to you? Where are you going to find another person for a threesome that you'd be comfortable with in bed, and how do you know she's disease-free? Can *she* be just a "bed buddy" and not want any sort of strings or emotional ties to your hubby?

I'm thinking "If you have to ask, the answer is 'no'"...

Answer 3

If it won't bother you then go for it. However, just remember, that your relationship with your hubby will change. If he pushes you off to the side and leaves you watching, how will you feel? Will it still be his fantasy? If your hubby is constantly pushing a threesome, you should tell him how about another guy instead of a girl, just to see how he feels about having a threesome. Most likely, he'll get mad and not push the topic anymore. Unless he really don't care.

Answer 4

What is intended to make a relationship more spicey...often has the opposite affect. It can open the virtul Pandora's Box.

In 9 of 10 such acted on fantasies, marriages end in divorce.

I can assure you, how you think you will react rarely is how you react. Picture watching a woman in your bed... being done by your husband..... almost oblivious to the fact that you are even there... You could react any number of ways. Even if you survive that..... what happens when you find out... he made arrangements to meet on the side with the girl, without you knowing... how will you react then.

I can assure you that no matter how well it works out or how bad it works out... your marriage, as you knew it, is over. It is no longer the loving, dedicated and committed love that you once had.

THINK about this.... RU willing to risk everything you have for a fantasy?

Answer 5

Why is he having this fantasy? When he was first in love with you, would he have thought about that kind of thing? If not (and I hope he wouldn't have), why is he thinking about it now? Aren't you enough for him? Doesn't he still love you? To me, when a man really loves a woman, he can't even think about other women. He needs to remember how much he really loves you; he doesn't need a threesome.

Something else too: maybe he says it would be "just sex," but sex has a way of getting the heart involved, too. Do you really want to risk screwing up your marriage for this? Don't open that can of worms. Find other ways to re-ignite the spark, if that's the problem.

Answer 6

Let me see, this is a hypothetical asked by the husband, right?

The wife that willingly gets another girl to do the husband is probably a dream come true for him, but unless you are bi you had better direct the action and plan it out in advance. The logistics of this little bit of swinging will be too cumbersome to do too often if you wish to stay in control of who else your husband gets to play with besides you. But then what hubby wants to return the favor and 'drag' in some work or fishing buddy to help do you? Are you ready to be so 'honored' by his best friend being really friendly with you while hubby helps?

You have a good concern, but don't seem as concerned as I would expect. If you get someone close to you then you risk his getting some from her 'on the side'. If you get someone distant from you then you risk looking really stupid to some strange woman.

I remember a homosexual propositioning me, wanting some oral and anal action. He was married and I suggested he get his wife to do it for him, but no. I said the only way I'm going to do anything with you is with your wife in between us because I'm not touching you. I thought that would be the end of it, and he came back to tell me he had asked his wife. I said, "Dude, that's too desperate for me." He finally got the message. Bear that in mind, you might not just have to worry about husband wanting it again, but the other partner might be, and she might have her sights more set on you than him. Something to consider.

Answer 7

There's a big difference between "I don't think I'd hate it," and "I think it would be kinda fun." If you can't get to the "I think it would be kinda fun," don't do it. You need to have a reason to do it beyond just it being his fantasy. If all you are is a means for his fantasy fulfillment, that will leave you unfulfilled.

Now, if you get to thinking it could be kind of fun, and you can actually enjoy doing it with him, it will make him feel like a god, and as his wife, that would make you a goddess.

Answer 8

Only if you can be sure you're not introducing herpes or warts or some other STD or emotional pain into your marriage. I mean, what kind of woman agrees to do a married couple? A skanky one, right?
What will you do when your husband wants it again. And again? And he reminds you that you screwed him with another woman last month? Then what? Are you going to be to forgive him when you remember seeing his weeny someplace other than you? What if he likes it so much, he gets 2 other women if you won't do it? And brings home herpes. And on and on.
PS
where do you go "get" another girl anyway?? On the internet? Ask your friends?

Answer 9

You should only do something like that if you really want to do it. If it makes you uncomfortable in any way, you should not consider it. However, if you do decide that this is something you wish to do, lay down the ground rules: if you only want it to happen once, make that a ground rule along with anything else that you want or don't want to happen. Prepare for any surprises you anticipate arising.

Answer 10

ok well there's a couple of question's you ask ur self: do you both watch porn 2gether?are u attracted by the site of woman? and have every been bi-curios,well screw it find someone one nite you both don't kno a party or bar and get a little tipsy and go for it but be up front with him that it's a one time thing unless u end up ejoy it trust me if he wants to do it that bad he'll follow jus let him kno you have fantasy's too goodluck