I have this ex who is controlling freak, I have sole custody of our almost 5 year old daughter he thinks he can be in my face about my life cause he is now paying support ..
He asked for me to stay out of his life and I have, and now almost 3 years happliy divorced he is still in my face about everything I do..
How do I say all you should care about is our daughter is Happy and stay out of my personal life without hurting his "pride"
2006-10-10 09:01:36 · 14 answers · asked by twistedsingle 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Oh I forgot I have a open door for him to see our daughter even when he was not paying, and he is getting married to the woman who he cheated on me with
I don't date nor do I want to, I just work 16 hours a day and take care of my daughter , he is mad that I got her ears pierced, and I signed her up for karate classes without his permission
2006-10-10 09:17:25 · update #1
First of all why are you concerned about his pride. he is not concerned about respecting you. Second he does have a right to know about his daughter but that is where it ends. what you do is what you do and it is none of his business. i could see if you were out there being a ho but you are not. it's obvious that he still wants you but what you need to do is let him know hey if you are going to call here questioning me about my life then you don't need to call at all. I am a grown SINGLE woman and i can do what i please. Now if he feels like you are out of place then that is something that he is going to have to deal with. Not you. he pays child support for your daughter not you. that's why it' s called Child Support. not ex-wife support. if he cant stop maybe you guys can establish an account in your daughters name and he can deposit money into that account and when he wants to see her or talk to her don't answer when his number shows up. Let your daughter answer. that way you have no contact with him at all.
2006-10-10 09:07:44 · answer #1 · answered by mdbdyot 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is just trying to continue controlling you. Put an end to it. Your personal life is NO business of his. Neither is what you do with your daughter when she is in your care, whether it be karate, dance or yoga...he has no say. I would put some serious space between you and him. Keep the conversations strictly about your daughter and refuse to speak about anything else. You are in no way harming your child by keeping the relationship soley focused on her. Tell him to start obsessing over his new posession and to leave you alone.
2006-10-10 09:26:26 · answer #2 · answered by babe 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In a firm way let him know that you do not pry into his personal life and as a common courtesy his has no right to pry into yours. Let him know that just because he is taking care of HIS daughter that is the ONLY place his concerns should be. And this may hurt his feeling ,but he needs to realize that you two are OVER. And by him continuing to ask about your personal life, he is making sure that this door never closes.
Good Luck
2006-10-10 09:12:46 · answer #3 · answered by TBobb 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well there are two things you might try. First, try to make all of your meetings with him in public places. Some day he will say or do something that will resonate with someone able to persuasively say "Back off"--there's always a bigger fish and there's always someone who can handle bullies (just never often enough around when you need one). The other thing is to say simply and sweetly, "Have you ever heard of something called a restraining order? If you keep this up, I'm going to find out about one and if you still keep this up you will find out about one."
2006-10-10 09:10:00 · answer #4 · answered by Rabbit 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd write him a very respectful note saying that you'd like to have a good relationship for your daughters sake, BUT here are my concerns....
For the sake of peace you're going to have to play to the guy's giant ego.
You're a special person for putting your daughter first. She's lucky to have a Mom like you. Good luck.
2006-10-10 09:12:26 · answer #5 · answered by noils 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Screw his pride. I don't understand why girls always care about their ex's feelings. Who cares? Sometimes you have to be really really mean in order for your point to get across. Sad but true. If you try to be civil about it, he's just not going to get it. Try it. If not, then be as mean as you can get, if not he's not going to change. You are going to have to hurt his feelings, if not you'll be in the same situation always. Do you want that?
2006-10-10 09:18:10 · answer #6 · answered by Rica 82 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A controlling freak who gets in your face NEEDS his pride hurt.
2006-10-10 09:03:55 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell him directly that your personal life is none of his business and that he only be concerned about the happiness of his daughter. If she is happy, then he needs to shut up.
Your not insulting him. You are only telling him to butt out.
2006-10-10 09:20:07 · answer #8 · answered by snack_daddy10 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Screw his "pride" he's just being an a**....you need to out your foot down and let him know whats up. Don't worry about him he's a big boy. He will respect you more if you stand up for yourself and say EXACTLY whats up. TRUST ME!!
2006-10-10 09:06:17 · answer #9 · answered by CMA 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
MUTHAF*CK his pride. Tell his twisted ask to mind his bees wax!!
Your personal life is of no concern to him unless your dating child molesters!! And I highly doubt your doing that. Put his butt in his place.
2006-10-10 09:04:58 · answer #10 · answered by NURSING FOR LIFE!! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋