Ok here is a snapshot:
Married for 4 years together for 6
We had seperated for 2 months were we both dated and now we are back together...
We are doing GREAT everywhere EXCEPT in the bedroom...
We are communicating, we are spending time together... We are having alot of sex but it is not very good...
She claims it is AWESOME and she has been quite satisfied while I have been very unsatisified and it is not very good.
Any ideas ladies? I love her and want this to work I will do anything ANYTHING to make it work.
Thanks!
2006-10-10 08:38:28 · 17 answers · asked by Confused C 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Dear Confused, you are in for a treat. Do plan on spending some time with her intimately. Do all the things you do except sex. Satisfy her and have her satisfy you. Teach her. Tell her all the secret things that men love for women to do. Tell her, "Touch me here, baby...." Whisper these things in her ear. Softly.
Go online together and read Kama Sutra as part of your foreplay. (This is very naughty.) Read Tantric Sex. (Does she blush, giggle, what?) Apply. Help her discover her sensuality. The senses, touch.......Buy candles and spend as much time as you have just pleasuring each other. She'll learn, you teach.
2006-10-10 13:40:27 · answer #1 · answered by Sunbaby 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think time will have to heal this one. During the split both of you dated and I imagine some of the trust was lost. With open communication and honesty hopefully you guys will regain your trust. But, it will take time-be patient.
Think about it. DO you wonder if she's had intimate relations with anyone else? If so, I'm sure you try hard to block it out when you 2 are intimate. And if you are thnking this, perhaps she is too. This could be the passion block. By the way, I'm divorced, but still really good friends with my ex. We have a child.
2006-10-10 09:03:36 · answer #2 · answered by Jill S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Open communication! Ask her to try new things. What excites you? Experiment together... Why isnt it very good for you? Think that one through and discuss it with her... is she a dead $#@%? If so ask her to be more expressive and this would give you great pleasure. Buy a book on new sex positions and try some out. Try talking dirty to her during the day and wind her up over emails and text messages.... You need to ask yourself what is really wrong with the sex and try to fix it. Are you attracted to her still? Did you play away whilst you guys were split for 2 months? Are you comparing her to other women? Love is a hard thing..never easy..try to work this through sounds like you really love her. Good luck.
2006-10-10 08:43:48 · answer #3 · answered by Lynne B 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
In a very sensitive, and educational way show your wife where you want her to be.....if you know what I mean. Tell her what you like as far as foreplay, etc. We can't read minds, so sometimes we need to be taught.
What is she not doing, or not doing right? With all this good communication going on between you guys verbalizing what you need and desire in the bedroom shouldn't be too hard.
2006-10-10 08:47:38 · answer #4 · answered by NURSING FOR LIFE!! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's nice that you want to save yourself for marriage, however, it is never guaranteed that your woman of choice will be adventureous in the bedroom when you get married. Most women don't have a high sexual libedo to begin with, so you should be worried because most guys don't get enough sex ever!!!! I am truley one of the few amazing women who have a Very High Sexual Libedo, and I can't get enough of my guy...ever. I spend the weekends with him and I find myself getting laid at least 5 times a day every day of the weekend and one night mid-week during a routine sleep-over that we schedule. I would discuss my expectations about sex and the bedroom before walking down the aisle and taking those vows. Good Luck in your pursuit.
2016-03-18 07:29:36 · answer #5 · answered by Michele 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it's worth saving try counseling only if both parties agree to it. In the meanwhile ask her what it is that SHE likes and doesn't like for you to do with and to her. Maybe it is not her hang up but yours. Could it be during that two month seperation you've experienced things with someone else you wish your wife would experience? If so talk to her about it.
2006-10-10 08:48:11 · answer #6 · answered by Tanya 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Congrats first off. Happy your both making a go and are still in love enough to make it work..
now your not happy in the sack. why dont' you tell her the things you like if you find that awkward try telling her when she's doing you let her know what you like in a whisper or a low voice . tell her to go here or there or down deeper or this or that. she's your wife dont' be shy. you'll have better sex that way.
and im sure she wants to please you just as much as you please her.
Just think if it was her first time she wouldn't be a pro .. so go in there thinking im going to make this girl a star heheh. and teach her as you go.. after a while you won't have to tell her she'll know automatically. so worth explaining now so down the road you reep more benefits.
enjoy bon a petite
2006-10-10 20:33:59 · answer #7 · answered by For ever in my Heart 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You really need to talk. Find out what pleases each other. Perhaps books or videos can give her some ideas.
By no means make her feel bad about this or it will only get worse.
2006-10-10 08:46:24 · answer #8 · answered by Saffernellie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If there's something bothering u, u really need to start communicating to your wife about it. Communication is an important foundation to making a relationship work.
2006-10-10 08:52:30 · answer #9 · answered by cheetah7 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to take control of this one. Only you know what would make you happy, so you'll have to just start doing it. People have such a range of what they find exciting, and only you know what's missing for yourself.
2006-10-10 08:43:38 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋