My husband knows that I've wanted to have a baby but he doesn't. So just to reassure him, I take my birth control pill in front of him because I got pregnant with my first child while i was on the pill and I don't want my husband to think i did this behind his back. I have been irregular for a long time now and switched brands on my pill. my husband knows all of this. If I am pregnant, I'm scared to death he is going to think I planned it behind his back and I didn't. How would you handle this? Thanks.
2006-10-10 08:24:10 · 11 answers · asked by rideabanjopicker 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I was in a similar dilemma once upon a time, so I can sympathize! I too, became pregnant while on birth control pills and another time while on the "shot". It was explained to me by my Dr. that there are NO fool-proof ways to prevent pregnancy other than abstinence. Some people just have a tendency to be more fertile than others. This problem wasn't eliminated until I got my tubes tied after my 3rd son was born. Hopefully your husband won't hold you accountable for something that may be genetic. If he has had issues with it now and/or in the past, gently remind him that, he, too has ways that he can help prevent an unwanted pregnancy!
2006-10-10 08:37:39 · answer #1 · answered by PBnJ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl, when you switch brand, it would help to use a condom for a while if you don't want to get pregnant. This is what I would do if I was concerned about pregnancy. Then your husband will be perfectly assured that everything that could have been done, HAVE been done. Tell him to get some rubebrs if he wants to "be sure".
I'm just wondering - what kind of marriage is this when he can't trust your word in such an important issue, and that you have to take your pill "in front of him". I would find it downright insulting if my husband even made a suggestion that I was not capable of keeping up with my part of family planning.
Again... If he feels like you're gonna do something "behind his back" - he can GET CONDOMS!!
2006-10-10 15:35:23 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds as if he wants you to take all the responsibility in the bedroom and blame you for any "mistake" that happens.
It takes 2 to tango, 2 to make a baby and if he doesn't want another 1 then he has to start using condoms.
He is being very controlling if he is expecting you to take the pill in front of him. Tell him that you will not take full responsibility if you become pregnant again because at the end of the day, if he doesn't want anymore kids, he can always get the snip.
2006-10-10 15:34:02 · answer #3 · answered by debs1701 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you could have him go to the doctors with you and have the doctor explain to him that switching pills or even taking the pill isn't 100% effective. there is always a chance of getting pregnant . I too got pregnant taking the pill and my husband still blames me. oh well, i know i didn't do anything wrong, so should you. just let it go.
2006-10-10 15:36:03 · answer #4 · answered by flwrgrl692001 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ah hello! It takes two baby! If he REALLY didnt want a baby and knew that you got pregnant prior whilst on the pill then it was really HIS job to ensure than no pregnancies occured... In other words...NO GLOVE NO LOVE! Stop worrying....if you are you are...and it took 2 of you to get there. If he freeks then he's an idiot....and he cannot blame this one you. Guys love to put all the blame on us women....if he was really 100% adament about never having a child then he should of closed down shop! My hubby did after we ended up with baby #3 when we really werent planning on it. Good luck..if it turns out your not sounds like a golden opportunity to relook at this whole situation and make him understand that he too needs to take precautions....
2006-10-10 15:30:33 · answer #5 · answered by Lynne B 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Does he love you? Do you love him? You guys committed to "death do you part", then what's the problem. Be honest and trust that even though he may not be happen today, he has time to change. That's what a marriage is about, excepting each other's changes. An unwanted child, doesn't have to always be unwanted.
2006-10-10 15:31:58 · answer #6 · answered by T W 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're worried that the person who swore in front of God and man to love, honor, and cherish you for the rest of your life is going to accuse you of something as low as creating a new life behind his back... then you have bigger problems. If he is so adamant about NOT wanting children, then he needs to go get his lil wires cut instead of putting it all on you.
2006-10-10 15:38:33 · answer #7 · answered by Mister_Mister 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If HE doesnt wear a condom along with you taking birth control pills, he is just as guilty so I wouldnt worry. Birth control is NOT the responsibility of one person. It is BOTH of your responsibilities. He should wear condoms or get neutered..or he can expect more and more babies.
2006-10-10 15:29:09 · answer #8 · answered by Mean Carleen 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
As far as I remember, it takes two to make a baby. Not like you went out and picked one up at the store without telling him. If he doesn't want kids he should have gotten snipped or used condoms.
2006-10-10 15:27:26 · answer #9 · answered by Fiona 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The only way he will believe you is if you already have a relationship built on trust. If you are always honest, he will have no reason to disbelieve you.
2006-10-10 15:27:41 · answer #10 · answered by all.about.the.details 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋