When is enough…. Enough for a sex offender!!!?

Question

I downloaded child porn. I was sentenced to four years in a federal prison. Served 3 years supervised release. I am labeled as a sex offender for the REST OF MY LIFE. I have lost every job I had when my employer found out about my past.

My crime is labeled: 1 COUNT POSS. CHILD PORN TRANSMITTED BY COMPUTER

I don’t deny that what I did was distasteful and illegal. I didn’t buy, sell, produce, or was in ANY way involved in the production of child porn. I downloaded it from a newsgroup. Nothing more… nothing less. I know you are going to say “This was the first time you got caught, what else have you done?” (Lord knows I have heard that MANY TIMES from people who don’t know me…) well, the answer is NOTHING. I know you won’t believe it… so – play my assumption for a second. Let’s ASSUME this IS the first and only time I have done anything like this. Should I be ostracized from the rest of the world because of something stupid that happened over 10 years ago?

A statistic came out that 100% of the people who killed and raped a child in a certain state was listed as a sexual offender. Well, you can choose ANY egregious crime and that person has committed a lesser offense in the same category; HOWEVER, you will find an uncountable number of people whom have committed low-level crimes that don’t go to the next level.

I know for a fact the if EVERYBODY was labeled as a sex offender that downloaded child porn – and everybody was caught that downloaded child porn, I KNOW you would be surprised at how many people would be on that sex offender list. I am saying a CONSERVATIVE 70% of the population that has a computer has downloaded child porn. You can’t possibly believe that everybody who has downloaded child porn has been caught. Doesn’t make it right, but those are the facts. I think you would be surprised at which family members of yours have done something like this secretly.

Doesn’t make them sexually deviant – they were just being stupid.

Funny, I have *personally* talked to MANY people and they can’t believe I was dealt with so harshly – and YES, these people trust me with their children.

Someone brought up a good point. She asked why I haven't said I was sorry. The fact is... I am TRULY sorry. I am sorry for my actions. I commited an EXTREMELY distasteful crime. I have just said "I am sorry" so many times that - in my mind - it is now implied. I have NO desire for any child or teenager in a sexual way. I guess it really doesn't matter how loud I scream that I am sorry or what I say, the fact that I have this scarlett letter on my back won't change peoples perception of me. This crime is OVER a decade old. I do have anger - but not for the reasons you might think. I have anger towards society lumping all people who have committed a sexually based crime into one category. When is it enough? I just want to live without fear of being fired or my children having to pay for a crime that daddy did - not necessarily in that order either. I am TRULY SORRY!!!

I also have anger towards myself for doing something so stupid.

Answer 1

You raise an important question.
If you can seperate yourself from your own miserable situation for a moment (sounds like things have been pretty rough, I'm not trying to be sarcastic) and think about all of the children who have been made victims due to this stuff and you can start to realize the necessity of such severe measures.

Now I realize you may not have been caught pants down walking into a Dateline sting, but the fact of the matter is you were guilty of a crime. Politically speaking it is a "hot" crime right now and so they are going to make examples of people unlucky enough to get caught. While I agree this isn't solving the problem (if anything it is probably driving people even further underground and making them come up with even more ways to keep from getting caught) you are just one of many examples that prosecutors are using to scare people who may even be "curious" about the subject. If seeing that someone who was just on the fringes of the issue, like yourself, will ruin their life if caught is enough to keep just one more person from downloading (read:supporting) CP then that could be considered a small victory. While you would agree that you will be affected by this for the rest of your life, what about the child?

I would like to point out just one thing. You don't once say you are sorry. You simply acknowledge that it was illegal and wrong based on current society, but you don't really seem that sorry. Maybe it is because you are angry over your current situation which is understandable I guess. Just my 2 cents

Answer 2

Out of genuine curiosity not judgement , I have a few questions for you.

What did you get out of looking at Child porn?

Does being around children or young teens turn you on?

Was it a phase you were going through and are you no longer interested in viewing Child pornography or attracted to children or young teens?

See, those are the questions I have about you given your situation, and those are probably the questions going through other people's heads.
I know you have served your time and I am sorry you feel life is currently unfair, but my perception of sex offenders is that they have little control over their behavior and at best situations have a dormant internal monster waiting to strike.
I wish you luck in creating a successful and healthy life for your self, and I hope you are not practicing or viewing deviant behavior that could be harmful to others. However, I'll be lieing if I said I won't be one of those people to hide children away from you.

Answer 3

The problem is there is no way of knowing that this is the first anad only time. Most sex offenders are recidivists. Despite their well meaning intentions and their affirmative statements, they usually wind up offending again, and usually each time its worse. So, lets assume you are being honest. You then are a victim of every other sexual deviant who has, by their actions, proven that it is unwise to turn your back on a person with a sexually deviant criminal history. Blame them, not the rest of us.

Answer 4

well, thats what u get for looking at child porn. What is appealing about child porn? And its sick, so why would a person want to hire a person who went to jail for looking at child porn. By the way...THAT'S ILLEGAL! And not to mention gross. Yes i do think that u deserve the penalty for ur sick crime.

Answer 5

well first of all why the hell were you looking at it in the first place?

and no i don't think it should have been dealt with so harshly

though you should have had it say 5 yrs max

but after that it should be dropped to something less.. ya know like a probation of the title, like if you did it again you would get it back on you record as the full thing and it would be permanent...

since its like 10 yrs it should be dropped to a lesser charge...

Answer 6

I think you have a good point but since the legal system is flawed I don't see it getting any better. Ten years ago is a long time to hold that over you.

Answer 7

When you do something wrong it is not that easy to correct it. It is kinda like an alcoholic, they quit drinking but they have to stay away from alcohol or they will fall again. You have a flaw in your character and people are not going to risk their safety and their childrens for you.

Answer 8

Four years seems a bit harsh. I think there is a difference, specially if you were not creating the porn.

You would be forgiven for muder before this.

Answer 9

Did you get rape in prison?? Sorry can't seem to understand what might have led you to seeing child porn.

Answer 10

I do not feel sorry for any hardship you encounter for the rest of your life.