How can I come out as bisexual?

Question

I go to an all-girls school and i kinda like this girl. But I also like guys. I want to come out, but I don't know how or when would be the right time.

My closest friends don't care about my sexuality, three other friends have come out but there are quite a few homophobes in my school too. I don't know what sexuality my crush is though.

Answer 1

Why come out? What is it going to do for you? If you mean, by coming out, that you tell a girlfriend that you want to be more than friends, talk to her. You don't want to walk around telling everyone you are bi, it is none of their business unless you are soliciting interest. Tell the ones you need to tell and leave it at that.

Answer 2

Tomorrow is National Coming Out Day. It's a day when many will be coming out to their peers. If you feel absolutely ready, then maybe that's a good time for you.

If not, then take it slowly and come out when you're completely ready for all the hurtful negativity (unfortunately you will experience this). But there will also be others to support you, so don't let all the bad people deter you. Do what you feel is right.

National Coming Out Day is an annual event, every Oct. 11th. So you can also wait until next year if you feel you need that much more time! :)

Good Luck!

Answer 3

The right time to come out is when you feel comfortable yourself. Firstly, you need to come out to yourself before you come out to others. You should never feel pressurised into coming out, as its a big decision which involves a one way trip - once you tell someone, you cannot untell them.

Bisexuals have a harder time than homosexuals, as they must learn to find their place in a world which is primarily heterosexual or homosexual. Bisexuals can feel like outsiders in both communities.

One problem bisexuals face is misconceptions from the gay and straight community. Some lesbians are hostile towards bisexual women, accusing them of "being confused", "unable to make up their minds", "being in denial about homosexuality", "sleeping with the enemy" or "hanging on to heterosexual privileges". Some heterosexual males regard bisexuality in women as some kind of fetish, and come up with suggestions such as "cool, can you bring your girlfriend round for a threesome?"

Your family may be supportive, or may come up with comments such as "you're just going through a phase" or "if you are capable of a heterosexual relationship, then why would you go for a homosexual one?".

Your best bet would be to contact a bisexual group. Unlike everyone else, a bisexual will be a great asset in helping you come to terms with dual attraction - which can feel very confusing. They will help you frame your own language and identity, which is a good foundation for coming to terms with a sexuality which is at large - unknown.

Answer 4

I would not worry about it if I were you. I am sure that there are many others that feel the same way. Just get to know people. Worry about the sex part of it later. I know, I know, easier said than done, but better to be curious and interested than hurt, dissapointed, and let down.

Mostly I would ask some questions among my friends along the lines of "What do you think of someone that is bisexual? Would you think different of them? I have a cousin ( or aunt, or whatever) that is. I wonder how people treat her."

Answer 5

It's quite simple, but ,when coming out you need to be a 100% sure that you are bi-sexual cause you could just being going through a phase. but the correct time is up to you. I suggest coming out sooner because then it makes the reaction more calm, but if you wait the reaction that arises may included some anger, but test the waters to see how your parents will react first then come out to everyone else. If you need someone to talk to e-mail me at [e-mail]

Answer 6

Slowly and selectivly.
If you are going to an all girls school, if you tell one person, it will get around. All those girls who like girls will find you.
I suggest you tell a close friend. They might not be surprized. DONT tell anyone who you fancy. Wait for them to hear about your preference, treat them like a friend and who knows.

I've been choosy about who I've told about me being bi. It's funny my two closest mates are both bi and we didn't know that when we met. I mean, it's tough. I dont walk up to people and say, 'Hello, nice to meet you, I'm bi.' so people don't assume. I would casually mention it when you are first starting to be friends with someone.

As for the right time . . . you could try when watching tellie with a trusted mate, see a hot girl on and mention that you would do her. Then say, 'you know, I guess that makes me bi.' That will start a converstaion!

Best of luck darling!

Answer 7

In an all-girls' school, that might be really dicey. I'd make sure there are no "morality" clauses in your student handbook. Also, are there any other bi or lesbian girls at your school? If so, start making friends with them.

It's also good to see what this girl thinks of LGBTs in general before you come out to her or let her know you like her.

Lastly, do your parents know? Because they *will* find out.

Answer 8

Take your time, you don't need to rush into telling anyone. It is your personal business. Find out if she feels the same way about you, then tell her, or just flat out tell her. Do it before someone else does.

Answer 9

Today is National Coming out day... 10/11/2006--- Why dont you make today the day..

Answer 10

Have a party with all your friends "Doctor" and play charades!! Maybe they'll figure it out!! lol Have fun!